Has anyone had this problem?

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I would not demand sex of my partner at any time. She is a separate person and although people can change somewhat, what she does is up to her.

TRUE - I think that's an extreme view of loyalty.
I tend to view it more as an adherence REGARDLESS
of the wrongs committed, at it's purest form. Not that
loyalty doesn't come in degrees. But, it seems an absolute
basis for love, and a relationship without love (or at least the
likelihood of such) ain't worth the time or effort. It isn't even
a friendship, in my book.

I mean that men shouldn't demand loyalty and sex out of women. It would be like treating them like material items. I think that men who are too controlling are considered inhumane.

I would demand trips to museums and conversations about the 1832 cholera epidemic.
Not sex though. No time for sex when there's history to be discussed.

Of course I would spend time with my girlfriend if I had one. If the girl asks for me to spend time with her somewhere, then I will be there. It is a small part in the much-needed loyalty necessary to keep a relationship. I wouldn't demand sex. I also would try not to demand total loyalty. I would give her some free will. I know I won't repeat what my former stepfather did to my mom.

I wouldn't demand anything actually.
If they didn't instinctively know exactly what I wanted and then immediately do it, then they're not right for me.

I think that the question is what you mean by loyalty.
I don't expect loyalty out of anything fully material.

Sex, sure. But not everyone is interested in inanimates.

What I mean by loyalty, I mean that I would let my girlfriend go places, see people, and do whatever she wants. All I would ask would be that she wouldn't cheat on me. I would want her to remember that I'm her boyfriend. However, I wouldn't be so controlling that she wouldn't be able to have any free will. Plus, if she loves someone else, she would need to be honest and tell me right away. Honesty is the best policy when it comes to love. I know I wouldn't want to end up on the Jerry Springer show or the Maury show.

So you wouldn't demand obedience?

Yoshie - sounds more or less like I see it.
Though I often regret being that way - as
there were moments where I think an outright
demand that my wife stop seeing some of her
friends would have been heeded, and would have
saved both of us a lot of grief. But I can't control someone
like that. It goes against my morality. Not that
it's necessarily wrong though - just as talking
to a random yet attractive person seems immoral
to me.

im no native speaker, but obendience is that someone obeys to me, right?

why should i demand something like that? for one, people who obey just because are boring - i want someone on eye level, a counterpart, not a blind follower. (followers ill have enough, once i rule the world... err, did i say that? ehhh... you are sleepy, you are very sleepy, the last ten seconds didnt happen, you just dreamed...) i would want someone who, through their way of being makes me believe that in their heads, as much is happening as in my head. someone who is not acting like a mindless puppet on a simple three-line program like over 90% of the population.
why should i demand anytghing? what on earth would put me in that position? i can ask for something, and my counterpart could agree or not. the same as i can agree or not. aint that the most normal thing in the world? were talking love and romance, not imperialistic politics...

No, I would ask for consensus. The world doesn't revolve around me. I don't always want it to be the world according to Joshua. I will not be as demanding as my former stepfather.

I do demand sex in a relationship and if I "really" liked someone I wasnt very patient about waiting for it.(especially in my teens-30's)I am female,so it wasnt difficult to find accommodating males but I cant imagine waiting until after marriage because I never planned on getting married.I was glad to be friends with a guy who didnt "put out",( hypothetical,since I never personally met one)but I needed sex and was honest about it from the beginning of a relationship.I dont think I would be very attracted to someone who didnt have a strong(but monogamous)sex-drive.

But this wasnt the topic that the OP was talking about(as I see it).I know what it feels like to be "not popular/attractive enough"and notice how different men treat you because of that.It is the same way,certain women treat men who dont drive the most expensive car or arent captain of the football team.You are treated as if you have less value as a human.The less value you have in the persons eyes,the less resources they are likely to spend on you(time,money,sex,whatever).That is just the mathematical formula that society uses for making decissions.The sme they use for valuing a diamond worth more than a piece of coal.....one is more "rare" and there for more valuable.It sucks but it is reality,(if you havent figured it out,reality sucks).

I thought,reality should cut me some slack because I didnt value someone for such superficial reasons(dated mostly guys with little money,no car,no fancy cloths,didnt expect them to spend their money on me,didnt have to be a rock star or an athlete)But reality didnt care.I still wasnt treated as well by these guys as the cute "bimbos" who batted their eyes at them....these so called "liberated,intellectual"guys would still fall all over themselves when a cute girl(who never gave a s**t about them other then what they could get out of them)came around and showed them some attention.

So your answer is.....get used to it.Try and find someone who is mostly nice to you and whose company you enjoy but dont expect them not to value beauty over your loyalty,intelligence,etc.

The door swings both ways
want to practice human reproduction
let us bash wooden swords together after ‘cause that’s my induction
a minimal amount of deduction is required
to reveal how and why this will function
it’s a duality that’s inspired
by our lack of an introduction
‘cause we see the equality
equally
and both ways

hey krex,

Coal burns and diamonds cut. ;)

I don't demand sex out of women....sure it means I'm a virgin, but at least I have character, eh?

Honestly, I'm one of those men who could care less when it comes to sex. I don't have any interest in it and if I were in a relationship, sex would never come up as a discussion piece. Part of it has to do with the fact that I'm not very trusting of others when it comes to sex, what, with me being a virgin still and having to deal with past relationships where women wanted to 'relieve' me of that, which I found totally disgusting and repulsive. I'd pretty much demand that she provide me proof that she were a virgin, too, before we had sex, and even then that wouldn't be a guarantee that sex would happen. I'm able to differentiate between love and sexual attraction. I can love someone without having a sexual longing for them, and chances are that whoever I'm in a relationship with will encounter this. If she wants nookie, then she can probably find it elsewhere. :\

Sorry if that sounds very harsh. However, I take my virginity pretty seriously and I'm hella picky on who I lose it to and who I marry and so on and so forth.