Online Dating

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whatamievendoing
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06 Jul 2017, 6:24 am

Empathy wrote:

There was a quiz on that link to Aspieology https://www.quiz-maker.com/QVKTX03#

Took the quiz myself out of curiosity, and apparently I got the following result:

Quote:

Your type: Chameleon / Sea Horse (AOCS)
Socially Open and Habitually Neutral

Behavior Preferences

The Chameleon/Seahorse (AOCS) is socially adventurous, enjoy the company of others, and opportunities to expand their social repertoire. Whether it means spending time with family, close friends or perhaps out meeting new people, they gravitate towards people and social interaction. While they enjoy spending time engaging with others, they may also require time to design and integrate routines, or structuring their daily life in a way that minimizes interruptions or surprises, and maximizes overall comfort and efficiency. Yet, they also have the ability to try new things, and scrap a routine or daily ritual whenever needed, or if it is no longer working.

Dating and Romance

The Chameleon/Seahorse (AOCS) benefits from an ability to welcome social interaction, as well as a knack for adapting to changing situations, by freeing themselves from rigid routines. However, by implementing deliberate routines into their life, they may be able to increase the likelihood of kindling romance. For example, joining a local yoga class or gym a few times each week, and getting familiar with the people who work there. This will allow them to feel at ease, while significantly increasing the chances of meeting new people, and showing off their social skills.

Alright, that description does not fit me for the most part. For one thing, I do not gravitate towards people and social interaction - quite the opposite. Not to say I dislike social interaction, but I only practice it in a select few situations. And when I do, it's only rarely by my initiative.

Second, I'm the complete opposite of what the thing says when it comes to routines. If anything, I thrive off them. And breaking an old routine or developing a new one, while not necessarily hard, isn't something that's particularly easy for me either.

I do like to try new things, though, so at least it got something right.

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FelineWizard
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06 Jul 2017, 6:40 am

I have tried several dating sites including one for "People with autism"(I use quotation marks because those people were scammers) and the results are not very good.

My experience is the following. Unless you are really rich or look like brad pitt it will be very difficult for you to find love on a site like that. I cannot judge for everyone ofcourse and everyone has a different story but in my case I often got either no replies or the conversation went badly. Due to the large amount of men on dating sites(often larger then women) is there an unequal gap between the two parties. A woman has a lot of choices while men are often ignored or simply scammed(which happened to me a few times).

Final Verdict: Don't bother. You are better off going to an event that you like and talk to people there.

XFilesGeek
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06 Jul 2017, 7:42 am

[MOD]

Hey Boo, tone it down, please.

I know your online dating experience has mostly sucked, but the OP is trying to create a positive thread.

Thank you.

[/MOD]

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TheSpectrum
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06 Jul 2017, 7:46 am

LOL :lol:

Erm, dating sites aren't all bad. Just go in with realistic expectations.
You're going to be exposed to lots of people but the same is in reverse.
If you believe you have unique qualities or are the better of a bunch of people that have the same qualities, then you should be fine. If not, do as our Feline Wizard suggests.

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Empathy
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06 Jul 2017, 4:02 pm

CivilSam wrote:

This is the only place I've ever run into so many people being confused with someone being retired from the federal government. Did you honestly think I am using a fake picture, am trying to find younger women, and am trying to date a fed person? I'm sorry, I am really confused here and I mean no disrespect, I just need you to clarify I guess.

I know you don't but maybe you could clarify yourself better. I'm from England. Actually, I don't want to discuss dating with anyone ever again, affer a ton of equally merciless bad experiences filled with confusion.

Aristophanes
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06 Jul 2017, 4:33 pm

Empathy wrote:

Actually, I don't want to discuss dating with anyone ever again, affer a ton of equally merciless bad experiences filled with confusion.

And with that statement you became 10x more interesting and I really want to know now... :lol:

smudge
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06 Jul 2017, 4:49 pm

Everyone's story bores me.

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Aristophanes
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06 Jul 2017, 4:57 pm

smudge wrote:

Everyone's story bores me.

Perhaps the problem isn't 'everyone' :wink:

. Oh and to tie this thread with your Fedex anger thread, 10 bucks says a flirty smile and wink is enough for the Fedex guy to completely forget about the VAT. I tried it once for a joke at my sister's request, but to my chagrin the UPS guy swung that way.

Empathy
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06 Jul 2017, 5:17 pm

Aristophanes wrote:

with that statement you became 10x more interesting and I really want to know now...

Have you recently filed for divorce? if you have, I'll fill you in on all the undocumented parts you skipped.
I'll just use my Skype recorder for all the stand up sessions that took place.

Aristophanes
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06 Jul 2017, 5:54 pm

Empathy wrote:

Aristophanes wrote:

with that statement you became 10x more interesting and I really want to know now...

Have you recently filed for divorce? if you have, I'll fill you in on all the undocumented parts you skipped.
I'll just use my Skype recorder for all the stand up sessions that took place.

Well I am autistic, I love me some fat stacks of data and documentation. You're such a flirt...

Empathy
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06 Jul 2017, 6:29 pm

Aristophanes wrote:

Empathy wrote:

Aristophanes wrote:

with that statement you became 10x more interesting and I really want to know now...

Have you recently filed for divorce? if you have, I'll fill you in on all the undocumented parts you skipped.
I'll just use my Skype recorder for all the stand up sessions that took place.

Well I am autistic, I love me some fat stacks of data and documentation. You're such a flirt...

Yeah well, that's nothing compared to whats moving under that stack.

kraftiekortie
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06 Jul 2017, 7:00 pm

If you're retired from the civil service, you're getting a pretty decent pension.

I'll be getting mine in five years.

Sweetleaf
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06 Jul 2017, 7:16 pm

CivilSam wrote:

I don't need a job, as I have a federal pension for working for the federal government and I live very comfortably off it.

Empathy wrote:

Not sure what that has to do with anything related to online dating though and, AspieDating would be I suppose, where autistics choose to find their first date.

I don't know lots of people on here are telling me I need a job even though I worked full time since I was 18 and am retired under a very nice federal pension (officially retired). I do lots of volunteer work at a local soup kitchen because I like to give back to the community and I thought that was enough for a job but I guess not? I can get a part time job if I have to though as I can work private sector.

If you're retired, which seems a rather lucky thing your age and satisfied with your pension why would you get a job? lol, that's ridiculous. I mean maybe self employment would be an idea if you want more income or start your own little shop or something but that's really up to you...if volunteering is more your thing that works to. I think the main thing is don't be doing 'nothing' like yeah obviously if you sat around the couch all day watching reality t.v and your house is completely filthy because you never bother to throw away trash and things like that it wouldn't be very appealing. But it doesn't seem like that describes you so I don't see the issue of not having a job in your situation.

For some reason some people equate not having a job to 'doing nothing' but there are plenty of things to do aside from going to work.

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TheSpectrum
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06 Jul 2017, 7:22 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:

If you're retired, which seems a rather lucky thing your age and satisfied with your pension why would you get a job? lol, that's ridiculous.

It's ridiculous because it's untrue.

Sweetleaf wrote:

I mean maybe self employment would be an idea if you want more income or start your own little shop or something but that's really up to you...if volunteering is more your thing that works to. I think the main thing is don't be doing 'nothing' like yeah obviously if you sat around the couch all day watching reality t.v and your house is completely filthy because you never bother to throw away trash and things like that it wouldn't be very appealing. But it doesn't seem like that describes you so I don't see the issue of not having a job in your situation.

Wanting to work and being able to work are two different things. Though, having actually been in charity retail management, I can confirm retirees and people who are genuinely on a pension/of pension age do often take up volunteering. I was a volunteer myself after a breakdown I had until I got back on my feet. It's very fulfilling and gives you a sense of purpose and duty. Those have the potential to be attractive qualities in dating. However, I didn't get any dates til I was employed again :lol:

so what do I know.

Empathy wrote:

For some reason some people equate not having a job to 'doing nothing' but there are plenty of things to do aside from going to work.

Agreed. If I had the option not to work these days, I'd take it and venture into art and volunteering. Also, the social stigma associated with unemployment or motivations for volunteering for good causes will unlikely go away any time soon.

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smudge
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07 Jul 2017, 12:25 am

Aristophanes wrote:

Empathy wrote:

Aristophanes wrote:

with that statement you became 10x more interesting and I really want to know now...

Have you recently filed for divorce? if you have, I'll fill you in on all the undocumented parts you skipped.
I'll just use my Skype recorder for all the stand up sessions that took place.

Well I am autistic, I love me some fat stacks of data and documentation. You're such a flirt...

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I've left WP.

smudge
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07 Jul 2017, 12:27 am

Aristophanes wrote:

smudge wrote:

Everyone's story bores me.

Perhaps the problem isn't 'everyone' :wink:

Damn, I put the apostrophe in the wrong place.

It was a letter, so a smile wouldn't have worked. That was lucky for you!

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