She says her parents won't let her date me

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No I've already given up and stopped talking to her. But this is an interesting coversation so I'm sticking around.

Oh ok. In that case I'll hang out with you and wait for someone to derail the thread haha

I don't buy into the alpha/beta male thing. I reject the entire premise. I've stolen women from the arms of their big strong "alpha" men and even impregnated one. Alpha/beta holds no useful meaning for me.

Supplication? Exactly why is that wrong? lol Some girls might find that refreshing.

And yes, I know it to be effective. Think dom/sub kink-type relationships. Who actually holds the most power, the dom or the sub? Bear in mind the sub has but to utter a single safe word and everything comes to an immediate halt.

Less extreme, but same idea. Partners only possess the power GIVEN to them by their mate. A truly strong and powerful man must really be confident and secure if he's comfortable handing the reins over to a woman.

Vetting? Meh, that's kind of a given. Half the point is getting to know someone and decide whether a second date is even in the cards.

The 80's... Well, you had Dynasty, living in excess, Reagan, the Golden Age of electronic music, the final days of the Cold War, Reagan, and the Golden Age of electronic music. What's not to love? Oh, and if you came by my house, yes, yes, that IS a real Synclavier in my bedroom.

The 80's were good to me.

There was, incidentally, an EXPLOSION of women's media back then culminating with peak of daytime soaps in the early to mid 90's. You want to know what women want? You don't have to go far. Very little has changed since then if you want to know the truth. And I think that's the reason for much of the decline in women's media.

NOW you have youtube channels and blogs whereas back then the magazine and romance novel publishers were the gatekeepers. Now everyone gets their Warhol 15 minutes plus some, and figuring out who to trust isn't as easy as it used to be. But I will say that anything that puts our needs ahead of women's needs in my experience has consistently been less effective.

Too funny you mentioned this! I actually have indirect experience with the dom/sub scene. I went to an escort convention in spring this year, and had a long conversation with a dominatrix I met. She showed me pictures of kink equipment on her phone, and talked about eroticizing pain, safeword etiquette, and similar things. She also said that she refuses to be a sub with clients, because she doesn't trust them to follow the etiquette as judiciously as she does. So if she fears being a sub with clients, it's safe to say that the dom has more power. Because the sub's power extends only as far as the dom's etiquette adherence. At the end of our conversation, she gave me a light spank, and joked: "Here's a free demo for you!" I joked back by saying a safeword she said she uses.

Of course, this convention wasn't as fun as the one I went to last summer. That one was in a rundown warehouse, in an equally rundown neighborhood. No dominatrixes attended that night, but I kissed 4 escorts and danced with many more (non-erotic partner dancing). Whoo-whee!! ! The Uber driver taking me home probably wondered what the hell was wrong with me, when he saw me smiling.

TheSpectrum, how's this for derailing the thread?

Country girls herr(half the girls) say they want real country boys who grew up on farms not pretenders from the city. They want a guy with a big truck and cowboy boots( I've met very few country men who wear those). So they won't be happy with a city. Or who fakes or takes interest in their interests, they want a guy who's been doing those things all his life. Also from my experience they tend to be women who still follow the men work and women stay home and men provide from the 1950s mentality so unless your well off country man it's best to avoid them. I can't provide for a woman, I don't own a truck, I can't stand getting dirt in mud or killing and gutting animals. I'm just a city boy who likes to go hiking and camping.

From my experiance, only a very few actually mean that, men and woman alike. It makes them appear more desirable or something, not sure though. I think the reason for this though is that people have a few dates, sleep with each other and that's more or less it due to lack of compatiability, so it might actually be true they want to ind a life partner, but in reality its not that likely to happen.

You're the one expressing melodramatic fantasies. Maybe isolating a fully grown woman at home is normal in Raqqa, but not most other places.

How many country girls have you dates and been in a relationship with?

What the flying frik are you talking about?

No one's denying the weirdness of the situation.
What FP was saying to you was rescuing this damsel in distress was a white knight's fantasy, which it is.

Well, we're also assuming the parents really are the bad guys. Let's be honest here. Some people with disabilities really are incapable of handling the world on their own. They are, so says the law, incapable of informed consent when it comes to dating, relationships, marriage, and sex. There was another guy on here who had the same problem. His girl really was real, they really had a relationship. But her parents wouldn't allow her to leave home, and they had very strict dating rules. The guy was ok with most of it, but it became apparent the parents weren't going to allow their relationship to progress any further. He did eventually break up with her. Last I heard she was giving him a hard time about it, meaning she's C~R~A~Z~Y. So when you have that situation, the parents really are doing you a favor.

Catfish, trapped with insane parents, insane herself--I mean, we got three different possibilites for SCREWED. Makes no diff which one at this point, unless you really think you got what it takes to break her out.

Even if you do break her out, what are you going to do with her? I busted a girl out of a "situation" and found myself stuck with her until she recovered. GREAT girl, I didn't mind, so it's ok. But you break someone out of prison you better be confident with drama management. You might be doing her more harm than good if you're not prepared for it.

If I'm to give my honest opinion and no offence to the OP, you'd have to be totally desperate to be asking a forum of strangers how to make that work so you don't have to deal with the morbid reality of isolation.

PF definitely made the right call. Plenty of other women out there.

Anyways!......

*munches a biscuit*

The bottom line is that it doesn't matter if her parents are trying to protect someone who doesn't understand the risks, she comes from an overprotective home or she is afraid of her parents the answer to give is "talk to me when you are ready to be an adult".

Yes, I thought I was doing my crazy ex a favour by trying to get her away from her "horrible" parents but in reality she was not capable of standing on her own two feet. I let her trash my place and get the cops called on me because I was trying to be the good white knight and "fix" her, blaming myself for her irrational behavior.

You may adore a child but you can't form an adult relationship with one.

This. This exactly. I got a girl out of an abusive situation and had to put up with her PTSD for years. I'm not ignoring my audience here--none of us would be here if we didn't have issues, so it's not about being judgmental. Can you take responsibility for your partner? Extreme PTSD aside, my girl came with a whole laundry list of dealbreakers, and for the first time in my life it didn't matter in the least. But I still have to be prepared for the worst. It's what I signed up for.

I think those of us who think we could be white knights aren't reading the fine print that goes with the job description.

I understand that's not what the OP is doing. He made a good call.

While the outcome of my rescue complex wasn't this bad, the driving motives were awfully similar.

I remember how I was with my first girlfriend (in college). When I first met her in my class, she told me she came from across the country to study, and didn't know anyone at school. And she showed romantic interest in me . So stupid me wanted to be a knight in a shining armor who alleviates her loneliness. Especially considering that I myself moved across the country 8 years prior, so I felt I could understand her situation very well. What I overlooked is that the motives for moving were as different as night and day. I was pretty much forced to move by my family; she chose to come because she picked that college. Later, my rescue complex bit me in the butt, as I rightfully deserved: she one of the most introverted girls I ever met, even to this day! Instead of wanting to explore the city together, she just wanted to hang out on campus, like in the student union or in the courtyard. Any semblance of a relationship there was fell apart a few months later.

She's 21 years old and her parents don't allow her to date??? That sounds a little fishy ... My parents are strict and always have been but even I had a boyfriend when I was 17 o-o They just don't approve of my current boyfriend and my dad told him that he didn't want him seeing me anymore a few months ago but I didn't meet him online or anything.