how to use dating sites?

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www.plentyoffish.com is free.

Tim

Yes, but beggars can't be choosers.
My experience with free sites is that there'a hardly anyone I could be even remotely interested in, and absolutely no one interested in me. I'm trying a paid website (I know, approximately 99.9% probability it will just be a waste of time and money, but apart from those two I have nothing to lose).

Correction: Actually, I have had interst in my profile, all from people far away and usually obviously, blatantly incompatible.

Last edited by pbcoll on 08 Jun 2007, 12:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I don't really have alot of personal experience about dating sites, but:

1) This "dating sates are unsuccessful" is a wrong, but popular belief. I read a study, that 94% of all people meeting each other having a prior internet relationship, were still going out 6 months later. The emphasis here is of course, meeting... So in my mind, it doesnt make too much sense to chat with someone living 8 hours apart from you. It may be fun, but realistically, nothing can emerge from it.

2) If you are male, you must be active. If you are female, you need to be Maybe that's the best thing you can learn from online dating: Being active, always writing people first and then dealing with the rejection, when many of them dont ever write back. This is somewhat similiar to real life.

3) Dont play a role. Dont have fear. In the internet, aspies are actually among the people with the most social skill. Over time you will learn which kind of questions come up often, which is quite similiar to the real world.
Just make you sure you arent chatting for years, and try to establish a meeting in the real world quickly.

4) Dont use email or private messages, rather some real-life chat like ICQ, and after time try getting a phone number or Skype or anything. Anything else really is a waste of time.

Oh an never pay for a dating site, it's nonsense.

You first have to find someone interested enough in you to be willing to meet.

I find that the free and public discourse
on this site is far more conducive to
making friendships than what could
be expected at a dating or friendship
site. Still, the dating places allow for
locality, which is a major issue.

Perhaps each city should have it's
own public forum, and people should
enjoy the semi-annonymous (sp?)
speech therin.