Too dangerous too be left with women!

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CockneyRebel
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10 Apr 2018, 12:48 pm

I'd rather sit around in my own little country (Germany) than go to a bar.


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10 Apr 2018, 2:39 pm

Jamesy wrote:
Going too bars is better than being stuck indoors on the weekend with my parents. When you havent got a partner you really dont have many more options.

I have been going too the same bar now for over 4 years now.


There are plenty of things one can do besides go to the bar. What about going for a walk, going to a movie, go to a museum...or perhaps look into hobbies you could do at home to keep yourself occupied.


Also, though maybe try some different bars, sounds like you just have negative experience after negative experience at this one, so what is really the point of going there?


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10 Apr 2018, 3:04 pm

Also you're probably not going to find a relationship at the bar either. Sure some people have met that way, but its probably not going to work for you. Also it would seemed rather its been intentional or not you don't have a great reputation at this bar...which even further reduces your chances of meeting someone interested in a relationship there.

So, that would be another reason to maybe expand your activities and such, it would increase your chances. And also maybe give you more to talk about and things to have in common with people.


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RetroGamer87
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10 Apr 2018, 5:45 pm

Jamesy wrote:
When i was at the bar last friday this guy i met there said too me "some may think people with mental health problems like yourself should not be left alone with women"

Is there some truth too his remark?

Is he a psychiatrist? No? In that case his opinion isn't worth dirt.

Next time someone makes a statement about mental health problems, ask to see their credentials.


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goldfish21
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10 Apr 2018, 5:53 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
When i was at the bar last friday this guy i met there said too me "some may think people with mental health problems like yourself should not be left alone with women"

Is there some truth too his remark?

Is he a psychiatrist? No? In that case his opinion isn't worth dirt.

Next time someone makes a statement about mental health problems, ask to see their credentials.


Why does someone have to be a Psychiatrist to have an opinion on mental health problems? :?

That's not the way opinions work. One does not require credentials to have an opinion on anything.


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RetroGamer87
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10 Apr 2018, 7:05 pm

I didn't say he can't have an opinion ;)


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10 Apr 2018, 8:13 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
I didn't say he can't have an opinion ;)


True. But his opinion is worth just the same as any other opinion that isn't a medical opinion (from an MD/licensed Psychiatrist), diagnosis, or expert opinion in court etc. To say it "isn't worth dirt," simply isn't so.


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10 Apr 2018, 8:24 pm

It honestly sounds like the guy was trying to insult Jamesy. That's my impression. On what basis does this guy conclude that Jamesy has "mental health issues?" It doesn't seem to me like the guy had good intentions when he said this. This is based on my experiences with people.

This is similar to what happened to me in school: It was assumed that I was "ret*d," so the kids treated me like I was "ret*d." There was no basis for this belief----the belief was borne out of the fact that I wasn't as socially adept as the other kids---that's all. I reacted in various ways. I threw temper tantrums. I tore this kid's ligaments when he tried to shake my hand after following me around calling me "ret*d" all day.

I would go even farther. I would CONCLUDE that the guy was trying to insult Jamesy.

I'm going to be honest: if I were Jamesy's friend, I would feel like just kicking the insulting guy's butt. That's my true feeling. I would probably hold off for legal reasons----but that's the feeling I would get. The guy deserves a taste of his own medicine.

My anger is aroused by these sorts of people who just want to be as*holes. I've had experienced enough of those people. I would FEEL like kicking the guy's butt---but my rational side would prevent me from starting the fight.

I'm not a "tough guy." It's just the feeling I get when I run into those sorts of people.



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10 Apr 2018, 8:39 pm

goldfish21 wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
I didn't say he can't have an opinion ;)


True. But his opinion is worth just the same as any other opinion that isn't a medical opinion


Exactly.


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Last edited by RetroGamer87 on 10 Apr 2018, 8:44 pm, edited 2 times in total.

goldfish21
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10 Apr 2018, 8:42 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
I didn't say he can't have an opinion ;)


True. But his opinion is worth just the same as any other opinion that isn't a medical opinion


Exactly.


It seems you and I place different weights on the opinions of people who are not medical professionals.

I think almost anyone can have an informed and valuable opinion to contribute about anything mental health related without being in the medical field themselves. They could also have an uninformed and stupid opinion about things, too, but just because someone isn't a doctor doesn't mean they can't have an opinion worth consideration. IMO.


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RetroGamer87
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10 Apr 2018, 8:50 pm

goldfish21 wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
I didn't say he can't have an opinion ;)


True. But his opinion is worth just the same as any other opinion that isn't a medical opinion


Exactly.


It seems you and I place different weights on the opinions of people who are not medical professionals.

I think almost anyone can have an informed and valuable opinion to contribute about anything mental health related without being in the medical field themselves. They could also have an uninformed and stupid opinion about things, too, but just because someone isn't a doctor doesn't mean they can't have an opinion worth consideration. IMO.


Maybe my disdain of non-expert opinions comes from debating creationists who think they know better than scientists when they haven't studied science.

When it comes to medical matters I don't even trust my own opinion because it could just be hypochondria.

Perhaps the average man can help someone with mental health problems but I don't think the guy in the pub wanted to help Jamesy.

When I said his unqualified opinion wasn't worth dirt my real intent was to provide Jamesy with a comeback for the next time the guy says Jamesy is too dangerous to be left alone with women.


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The Grand Inquisitor
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10 Apr 2018, 9:24 pm

Your questions always seem to warrant the most common-sense answers. Someone woth sexual desires and severe impulse control issues or an intellectual disability that prevents them from understanding consent should not be placed in situations where they may act inappropriately. Most on this forum and on the higher functioning end of the autism spectrum do not fall under this category



The Grand Inquisitor
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10 Apr 2018, 9:25 pm

Your questions always seem to warrant the most common-sense answers. Someone woth sexual desires and severe impulse control issues or an intellectual disability that prevents them from understanding consent should not be placed in situations where they may act inappropriately. Most on this forum and on the higher functioning end of the autism spectrum do not fall under this category



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10 Apr 2018, 10:08 pm

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
Your questions always seem to warrant the most common-sense answers. Someone woth sexual desires and severe impulse control issues or an intellectual disability that prevents them from understanding consent should not be placed in situations where they may act inappropriately. Most on this forum and on the higher functioning end of the autism spectrum do not fall under this category

The man in the pub seemed to be suggesting Jamesy falls into that category. Shows how much he knows.

The trouble is, there are many types of "mental health problems", the majority of which don't make the sufferer a danger to women.

The fact that the man in the pub refers to " mental health problems" as though it's a single condition shows that he doesn't know what he's talking about.


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goldfish21
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10 Apr 2018, 10:24 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
Your questions always seem to warrant the most common-sense answers. Someone woth sexual desires and severe impulse control issues or an intellectual disability that prevents them from understanding consent should not be placed in situations where they may act inappropriately. Most on this forum and on the higher functioning end of the autism spectrum do not fall under this category

The man in the pub seemed to be suggesting Jamesy falls into that category. Shows how much he knows.

The trouble is, there are many types of "mental health problems", the majority of which don't make the sufferer a danger to women.

The fact that the man in the pub refers to " mental health problems" as though it's a single condition shows that he doesn't know what he's talking about.


Except that what the man in the pub knows is what his perception of Jamesy is, and while it might not exactly be pleasant to hear, it's valuable feedback for Jamesy as it can inform him that some people may perceive his presence, behaviour, demeanour, body language, facial expressions etc as "creepy," or as a sexual threat to women and knowing that can allow Jamesy to think about why the man in the pub gets that vibe from him, and in turn give him some things to think about improving if he can so that others don't get that impression from him.. so, there's that.


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11 Apr 2018, 4:58 am

Is Jamesy the member who got arrested for assulting a bouncer because the bouncer insulted him :? It's possible I'm thinking of a different member but if it was Jamesy, perhaps the guy who said he shouldn't be left with women told him that because of his bad rep.


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