Late 20's to 30's: dating & romance

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You're old, so a bootcamp may be a better option for you since it requires less time and it focuses on coding only - Computer Science on the other hand doesn't focus on coding only; it's a broader science.

During the last year I was doing a lot of coding at work (Node.js, Angularjs and Powershell), a senior developer I work with (20+ years experience) told me recently that I became a true developer and put me in the project's bitbucket (a private git), i 've been on it for 3 months.

I am actually a little bit younger, but do feel old because haven't done so much been aimless for a while due to no goals. I use a different age on every site. So as to not get stalked(maybe paranoia). Been paranoid since on other forum they hacked a guy and kept posting an imgur link of a screencap of his email including all his personal details, I think it was a pay stub.

Would there typically be a lot of things not directly relevant to work in coding? I've looked a little at local uni's program for year 1/2 and they want students to take some sciences but most are electives or else appear to have direct relevance, only exception being a Physics class or two.

Where did you do bootcamp and how long did it take? was it a site like 314pe mentioned? Might be a good final test to see if this is the career for me(better than getting a degree then deciding I don't like it).


That's pretty cool!

Frankly unless you are stable ie. live independently, have an income that could provide for two people AND do only some of the activities you mentioned, you're better off going for women in the 20-25 age range. They're currently in advanced education with an equally fresh world view that you have. And, thanks to the modern ways of the world, have a more open minded outlook on what maketh the man. Seriously, the folks from my generation vs. those only 5-10 years younger than me are vastly different and it's actually not a bad thing.

I'd say start with being less defensive towards those in here, take some pointers, apply yourself to them and learn to enjoy the cards dealt to you. I've seen many people take up activities or running groups in vein of finding a partner and they often end in 2 ways.. 1) A shallow, empty relationship/dating period which eventually expires. 2) Being creep zoned by other participants as it becomes obvious. You don't wanna be these guys. Activities are a way to potentially make new friends and relationships yes but should never be the end game.

Most courses we had did not involve coding, but were useful for work or even for life in general. We had not only physics and lots of math, but even things like psychology and law.

Psychology is pretty cool, I've been thinking I will select it for electives. Probably will choose psych 200 for semester 1 elective. Outside of that it's a hard decision. Maybe law would indeed be very helpful for life.

My cleaning lady has a law degree. I would pay her the same amount with or without the credential, so in one sense you could say that the legal degree was a waste of time and money.

Thanks for the website 314pe! Think I may have found something ideal.

https://www.edx.org/course/introduction ... ing-python

A fair number of the jobs I see seems to specify Python or Java. There's a ton of variance and languages but these two seem to be the more common ones.

Does she have the full lawyer's degree, a Juris Doctor?

I live in stable home for awhile, living independently renting on my own paying bills on my own. I have professional networks of people. Don't have a job now but income is there. I don't judge that. I met lot of couples who have very low income, even a lot lower than me still have kids. I see more of compatibility and common sense rather than looks and money. That what people in their 20's, thinking about this area too much. My psychologists and older couples including my family and friends network kept telling me money and physical looks isn't a factor of compatible relationships.

I have a friend who is in wheelchair, she is younger than me and doesn't have a job but running a business like I am developing one. She have a boyfriend of long time, and there isn't any factor of looks and money there. They are just both happy of themselves. That is most important part.

At the moment my current activities are: running a young adult Landcare group as volunteer and networking, developing social enterprise business with vast and supportive networks, fitness bootcamp three times a week, running club once a week, play sports seasonally, run and attend Meetup group in specific of 'aspergers', 'socially young and anxious' group and 'social 20s, 30s' group etc, and attend community like minded interested events. I have been doing that for long time. I own a personal diary to write down my schedule ahead. I am keeping track of my own responsibilities and balance.

I have been doing myself for long time and that what makes me keep going. I hate it when people attack on me saying 'poor you' about no money, not good physical attraction looks etc. I had some friends saying that to me, but found them are shallow. I am protecting myself, my identities and compassion. I enjoy life when things are good, and avoid bad things. I try to avoid mistakes. I am not perfectionism person, I am very honest direct and straightforward on my tasks and responsibilities. I don't copy other guys in general public by the way they wear, placing tattoos, piercing, weird hairstyles and the way they speak.

I am not a nightclubber kind of macho person. I am a career driven, passionate and caring person. That is all.

She has whatever you get by doing graduate study in a law school in America. Is that a JD?

Who do you think you are? Paddy McGuinnesa? Wind your neck in.

I believe so. That's surprising, I wonder why she isn't working as a lawyer for big bucks?

I have physical & mental disabilities besides Aspergers & I've majorly struggled to find a relationship on & offline. Most women weren't willing to give me a half a chance due to my issues & my income & the few who may of been willing had communication issues with me because I'm too direct & straightforward for some NTs. I would of gone the mail-order bride route if I had the money & resources to do it. & if I had my own place, I would of looked for a girl who needed a place to stay. I was just wanting someone to give me a real chance & actually try to make a relationship work with me because I belived that most any women would love me if they really did because of how devoted, loving, caring, supportive, affectionate ect ect I am to my partner. I was also very willing to date women with issues/problems but even they wouldn't give me a chance. I got all 3 of my relationships on web forums. The 1st was when I was 20 & me & her were good online friends. I met my 2nd & current on here by making LOTS of post about what I was wanting, what I had to offer, & the way I was within a relationship. I made posts for years before they paid off thou. I got my current girlfriend when I was 29 & we moved in together after about 7 months. I moved from Louisiana to Vermont to be with her. I was very willing to relocate because I felt trapped where I lived & cared more about having someone to share my life with than I did about seeing my family regularly(I never had a close realtionship with them)

So you have a girlfriend for awhile, so what has changed? What happened? Like how it started.

While I don't value relationships from online world, I don't spend time on computers. I prefer go out in community and meet people in person. Learning communication and social skills are important being in reality. Text and that isnt good thing over screens. It misses a lot of body language and cues. It also impacts on ASD because of our inabilities to read them. So using devices that don't have access to reading body language will impact more.

Don't mind them. There is a subset of men here who likecto attribute their lack of success in the dating world to external factors such as lack of super model looks and lack of millionaire income rather than social delays, ineptitude, or bad luck.

Listen to gradma:

WP Grandma doesn’t agree with you:




Also the « lack of model looks and millionnaire income » part is a hyperbolic exaggeration.