Never rains but it pours!
Maybe the returning app messager had lost interest, but her position has shifted and now for whatever reason you have become more interesting to her again. Or maybe she was busy as you say. Or maybe she was having doubts of some kind that were not to do with you but with herself.
If all you're doing at present is talking on an app, you would ultimately have the same right to just fade away as she did before ... wouldn't you? For all we know, she's also talking to 300,000 other girls.
Lost_dragon wrote:
Currently, I'm not entirely sure how to approach this situation. I'd like to meet this social media friend in person, perhaps we should hang out first before attempting a date. Or maybe not. I don't know. Now, if things go well, then in that case I'd let the other down gently.
I am probably the least well qualified person in the world to advise anyone on dating, but from everything you've said so far, meeting Social Media Friend in person does sound like a promising next step. Hanging out first before attempting a date sounds reasonable in principle. Who knows, if the chemistry were right, you might both decide to skip straight from hanging out to something more than!
I've never been 100% clear as to the real purpose of "a date". Is it not really just a very artificial, and sometimes expensive, vehicle for somewhat stilted and time-limited "hanging out"? But admittedly, I think I'm probably demisexual or demiromantic or something like that, because I really can't get a major crush on someone I don't already know. So a date was never much use to me, because you'd need a year's worth of dates with someone to even begin getting to know the person really, and even then, to me at least, it isn't until you start actually hanging out together that you get to know one another properly. But maybe that's just me.
I would like to cast my vote for Social Media Friend, in the circumstances you describe. And in fairness to Returned App Messager, maybe this matter ought to be pursued sooner rather than later?
Hopefully there would be a way of "playing it cool" (or something like that) with Returned App Messager for a while, until the Social Media Friend situation became clearer?
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You can't be proud of being Neurodivergent, because it isn't something you've done: you can only be proud of not being ashamed. (paraphrasing Quentin Crisp)
16 Oct 2019, 10:37 pm
