Have a thing for a girl. There's a twist........

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They’re not genetically-related—that much is clear.

But there are judgmental people around.

I’d still go for it, though.

Good luck.

OP you'll have to find a way to meet her more often if you want this to go further.

You'll have to find a way to either implicitly or explicitly broach the topic of a relationship between you to. In other words you'll have to find a way to move beyond the friend stage.

Yes it's possible to have a relationship without going past that barrier but that only works in scenarios where you begin dating straight away (blind date, dating site, get set up on a date, etc).

One has to be aware, that’s all.

Update: yesterday I hung out with her, her family and my dad. I think I acted better than I would’ve before. I held the door open for her once. My stepmoms family is having another get together on Christmas and my dad and stepmom gave me the ok to go to that. I confided my crush on this girl to my mom. Her basic message was “there’s no moral issue here but it’s tricky” and told me not to initiate anything(which I think would be good advice with any girl).

Maybe “don’t initiate” with this particular person.

But, as a man, one usually has to initiate things as far as romance is concerned.

I was really shy when I was your age. And my “initiating” usually was pretty awkward. But, gradually, as I gained experience, I got a little better.

Don’t give up on “initiating.” But make sure you are always a gentleman.

Certainly don’t follow her around.

Maybe you could tell her how you feel once you two have had a couple of dates.

People give different advice because each individual is different from the other. Each person has their own take on things.

Unless you can ask her if you can perform cunnilingus on her every month for the rest of your life, don't worry yet about telling her how you feel.

Like your mom probably implied, she is gonna be scared if rushed.

Need to warm her up, let her see your body, manners, suit [whatever is about suits that women love] and be close to her sometimes. Be there when shes in distress or can't find a dance partner, a tissue or help install a lightbulb or something, bring her something she wants.

After 6 months you can ask the perform question. [but replace cunnilingus with cpr unless you want to have your balls fed to you and get a reputation as the wedding heartbreaker. then you can be sure her friends are off the table. Secret is they are anyway now because you are into her]

My dad asked me why I really wanted to go with him and my stepmom to see my stepmoms family. Seemed as if I was backed into a corner, so I told him about my crush.

Just based off the fact that I am crying right now, he didn’t take it well. He said that because she is my cousin, she is off limits and he thinks that it will make everyone uncomfortable. I tried to tell him that this has nothing to do with anyone but her and I, and that whatever happens is between us, but he thinks the opposite.

My dad talked to me about it in a way that makes me hate myself. It’s better when I talk to my mom about it. Although she did say(when I was texting her after that conversation with my dad)”don’t pursue a relationship”. I didn’t know what she meant there. I asked her “are you saying that because her and I just met, or do you side with dad? I also told her that no matter what she was about to say, the replies I have gotten on this thread are not gonna go away. That my dad is the only person I know so far that is against a potential relationship. My moms response was that if I made a move, I’ll regret it later. However, she said that no one thinks poorly of me and that she and my dad are just trying to protect me.

Although my dad seemed to fear otherwise, I was never gonna just ask her out when we see each other in 2 days. I was gonna do exactly what I already said on here. Hell, I know it’s possible she might find us dating to be weird

Lastly, my dad said that a relationship would be wrong to society, not just to him. Given what I’ve seen on here and in responses to similar stories on Reddit, I find that to be ridiculous.

So it’s now unclear whether if I’ll even go to that get together now. My dad sent me a text that made me feel a bit better toward him, but I am still shook up.

^ Sorry you're dad made you feel bad. We have so many members from all over the world, I think opinions given here won't always be reflective of opinions that exist in your own microcosm. I've observed that Iowans tend to be more iffy on these sorts of things (but often too polite to say anything to your face).

Plus every family dynamic is so different. Families that are really close may see more potential problems with this sort of relationship because of the rifts it could cause. For instance, I've always been really close with my cousins and they're almost more like siblings to me, but my husband has ~15 cousins that he doesn't know nearly as well.

^but I rarely ever get that chance nowadays.

She isn't even your cousin & you didn't grow up with her.

See with my stepsisters - I wouldn't hit on them because they're like actual sisters... BECAUSE I was 9 when our parents got together. I even call my stepdad 'one of my parents'.

If my dad got married now, his new 'daughter' would be neither my sister nor his daughter. UNLESS he was to marry a younger woman with a little kid. And then the age gap would be a problem too. I wouldn't consider his wife to be any kind of mother to me.

The cousin marriage thing is mostly a social taboo anyway. It varies from culture to culture & era to era in a way that it rarely does with siblings.

Edit: Just read your conflict with your dad. To be honest I wouldn't date anyone who it would upset my mother to see me with. Been there, done that in my teens & twenties. Family harmony is more important.

Don't go for it.

But she isn't really your cousin. Just - keep your dad sweet, your dad is your close blood relation and you shouldn't be considering unnecessary conflict with him.