Pugly wrote:
gwenevyn wrote:
I find I have a lot of male traits, but my major feminine trait is that I like to talk about problems that I don't want or need help with. If I want advice, I will ask for it directly. Otherwise, I'm just sharing what's on my mind.
Is that a feminine trait? I find myself just talking about a problem... and not really expecting a solution... but explaining a problem helps solidify my own ideas.
Good point. No, I don't think it's a feminine trait. It's just a stereotype.
Pandora wrote:
techstepgenr8tion wrote:
Well, when you know that you have a more in-depth grasp on an issue than most people its going to be very difficult to find anyone who can add to that perspective. The best someone can do in that case is just be a sounding board - if they'll sit and listen I really don't know what more you can ask.
That's just the trouble when we talk about things - how many other people are willing to just listen and not jump in with unwanted advice. I would only want advice that was something I hadn't already thought of and that I felt I could take up.
Pugly wrote:
Though I may not consider potential solutions, I don't think worse of a person that offers help.
I should correct what I said. I don't think that the advice is what bothers me, per se. It really depends on the personality and air of the advice-giver. For example, "Hey, did you think of doing xyz?" would be acceptable, even if xyz wasn't a good idea. Somebody who says something like that is just trying to be helpful. What I don't like is when somebody offers advice as a way of stroking his own ego, not in an honest attempt to communicate with me or know anything about me. People offering advice in an earnest attempt to
help actually listen to the details of what you've said, take your background and experience into consideration, and probe you a bit to see how much you know about a given subject. He will meet you as an equal, not lecture you as an inferior.
Quote:
But that's just generally not liking people who exude expertise in areas they don't understand.
Yeah. Arrogance is pretty gross.
Though I've been told I inadvertently come across that way myself on occasion.