I cannot believe I haven't had sex yet!

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Does your church have a singles group? If not, have you ever talked to your pastor about the possibility of starting one?

Is he a serial killer?

Over the years, I've seen several articles in the news about serial killers having many female fans. In one of the articles, a psychologist explained that the reason for the popularity of marrying serial killers is that for some X% of the female population (and surely the male population as well), fame is so extremely attractive that it causes people to fall in love with famous serial killers, and just ignore the fact that the object of one's love is a serial killer. Just simply ignore the fact that he's a monster.

It's surprisingly common, according to the articles I read. Usually it happens with bad guys who are less extreme than serial killers, but it also happens with the most extreme bad guys. Even Hitler was very attractive for a surprisingly large number of girls. I say "girls" because no woman could love Hitler.

Why can't you believe you haven't had sex yet?

Because she's not married, obviously. It's absolutely not possible that she had sex, because if she had had sex, then she would be already happily married and living happily ever after.

Note the above paragraph isn't my opinion. Not at all. I was just guessing what her answer would be.

Yes it is because I am waiting for marriage

Maybe what I actually meant to say is I can't believe I'm not married yet!

Wow, and here I thought I was merely delusional and narcissistic when I believed I have prescient powers of clairvoyance.

I am still waiting to have sex until I'm married

However if a good enough guy comes along...I might break that rule!

I haven't even kissed a guy in YEARS!

It has been so long I forgot how to do it

I am sex-deprived and kissing-deprived

Once I'm ready and he is ready I want our first time to be special

BIRTH CONTROL.

Of course I would use birth control

Or I wouldn't allow him to get to the point of penetration because I am terrified of pregnancy childbirth and labor!

Before I can actually have sex I MUST get over my body insecurities first!

I don't even like it when a doctor tries to look at my body during a physical

I would have to be able to completely trust my partner before I am willing to be naked with him

Don't go to church to be honest. Is a nice thought, but when I used to go, the church, or similar Christian based organisations seemed to have a tabol thing about dating within the church, but at the same time did not approve of dating anyone who was not a Christian, but when I tried to ask advice from.pastors and others they had other things to do so I never really did knowwhere I stood of what was permissable or not.
Most of what I have rearding this subject comes from advice given by my parents which was good advice but did not come often if I asked more in depth questions such as what this or that word means. I remember more than one occasion I would ask my Mum, she would go bright red and said "Ask your Dad".He would go bright red and say "Ask your Mum" and it would go back and fore like this u til I was told to read a book in the library (Which I never did as it was taboo to even ask about the subject, and besides, I did not have a clue what such a book would be entitled in those days to find out) and was once told to "Ask your friends in school", but I was a complete loner apart from some years having the odd person as a kinda friend but these questions no one was street wize enough to know. So I made up answers when people asked me which became most amusingto those who heard them, and acted as a mask to actually speak to people as I think much of the large secondary school would come to ask me questions to hear my amusing answers. But I could not have any serious conversations about the subject with anyone. In church people would just go quiet and not answer, and it was generally the same at home, though My Mum did give advice in regards to "Wait until you are married" etc., but it wasn't a subject thatwas talked about.

Is rather like mental health where I was told time and time again from both my grandmothers (Who in their day had very good reason for telling me as one had hardly any life due to addictive pills which would keep her like a zombie, where she eventually weaned herself off them only for the same pills to change their name, and she was put on them again, and her life was awful again, and many years later she got off them again and again doctors perscribed the same pill under yet another new name and many years later when she got off them, in her elderly years yet another doctor gave her these "Purple heart pills" which turned out to be a new name again for the same sort of thing! Looking back on hef life, all along she was on the spectrum and needed support and got none!
My other grandmother on my Dads side who lived much of her childhood years as an orphan going from relitive to relitive until she and her sister were taken in by a relitive who owned a big country mansion house as servants, and there theylearned how to cook and other things... But she herself had personally known people or known of people who went to their doctor through ordinary stress or minor metal things and ended up locked for years in mental institutions for asking. They knew these people were not insane and just needed some athoritive figure (A doctor) to talk to. This was done by doctors here right up to the 1970's. Yes, some did need the mental institutions but many just needed a mental rest. In these institutions people were said to be so drugged up it was hard to tell if they were sane or not when they went in! Though I did hear of the odd person who came out of them! One man I knkw was grabbed by his doctor and the police, and forced into one when he became a Christian because his wife and brother-in-law saw quite a change as he had stopped doing the bad things that they were doing so they saw quite a change! He was taken to a mental hospital for a few weeks and he said he saw the most interesting inelectual people in there who were patients, and the mental hospital could find nothing wrong with him so released hime giving him an official certificate of sanity which he has kept to this day! I have seen it! It is hillarious to know that these certificates exist!
But it was drummed into me from a very early age to never say anything about ones mental health to a doctor. It was only in desparation a few years ago I did and it took me two years to ask as due to the stress of asking my mind would go blank with each appointment I tried,and I would go to default mode and mention about the shutdowns (Which I did not know what they were called and no doctor ever did find out what they were though once one came close, so they were attributed to being"Mystery allergies" but each time Iasked over a 25 year period of asking, Iwas told the NHS did not do allergy testing or did not have the budget for it).

Sorry. Have forgotton what the subject was.
Ah.. No. The advice information about dating came more from my Mum and Dad and a few other older people who all said I have plenty of years left so not to worry, and then one day I was in a church gathering and an African pastor came there and asked if there were single men and was surprized that I was 40 and and ever married or been in a relationship and said that there was something wrong for a man to reach what was my age at the time and still be single... (That was a good few years ago). But as my Mum explained to me, in his native country it was rare for men to live past their 40's so there was more of an urgency there to find a partner.

But sorry to use many words and go off subject like I normally do! I don't often meet ladies my age and when I do they are married.

Also to add to this, mentally, (And I know this is strange) I do not know how old I am because when I was 16 I almost had a girlfriend but when I went on a date where she said via a note to meet me, due to prosopragnosia I did not realize it was her. She was dead quiet and shy, and I mistook her for one of the Mums waiting for their kidsto come out of te school next door to thecollage I as in. During the time of waiting...actually about half an hour later, it hit me that the collage had more then one set of gates. Found out the large perimiter hadfive sets of gates, so I got on the bike and cycled quickly to each one again and again as the last thing I wanted to do was upset her, but she was not there so I wet back to the main gates and thought this lady waiting under her umbrella must have a kid delayed in the school next door, and as it was getting dark as it was winter and they had put the clocks back, I decided that after 45 minutes of waiting that I should go. (There was also another guy in my class who fancied her and he told me that she would not turn up as he wanted to date her).
Anyway. The next day her friend approached me and really had a go at me and she was in tears whenshe looked towards me, so I spent the next few months avoiding them making sure they were not in corridors when I passed etc. I saw myself to blame and I vowed I would never date another and upset a lady like that.
I did date when I was 36, and it took a whole lot of persuasion by the lady to get me to date her. It kinda lasted a few months before I discovered from her sister she was already married, and not wanting to upset her I carried on dating as she was getting a divorce at the time, and we were going to get married. Then one day when she had me take my entire years annual leave at the same time and she had me take a loan out to buy a van (She was going to have it after we were married but she knew full well I did not like the van myself), and the day she saw I had the van which was the first day of my annual leave (Where we were going to go on a big caravanning holiday) was the last day we were a couple, as she said she needed time to herself and that was that. All attempts after a few weeks to contact her were blocked by her family and when I drove the hours drive to visit they said she wasn't there, so I went into deep depression and made an attempt to end my life where God saved me from and to this day I don't know how!
But then six months after that a work collegue told me (Due to shifts I had not seen him for six months) that she was passionately dating another guy as he had seen them at the same time when we were preparing to get married! She was 8 years younger than me.
But going back to when I was 16, my mind kinda stuck in years... What I mean by that, is that what I viewed to be the perfect date kinda would look for ladied who were of the similar age that I was when I did not recognise that lady, but I did seem to move a bit to look for ladies in their mid to late 20's when I was in my mid to late 30's.... But then my mind stopped in that ladies in their 20's seemed a bit young, but ladies my age seemed a bit old and I could not find any age that would suit me because in my own mind, I seemed stuck at the age of my early 20's.... And I never forget when I had hit burnout (Or breakdown) two or three burnouts ago, where I walked out a small shop following a group of 20 year olds thinking I was with them and thinking I was their age when I was twice their age! I didn't even know them! But it was like I was in collage or in a group I was in such as the Princes Trust when I was in my early 20's! It was odd.
Age wize I really seem to consider myself these days somewhere in my mid 30's or a few years beyond? Yet ladies of that age are going to think I am weird if I want to date them! Haha!
So I don't know. I am not looking because I don't expect. But maybe God will one day make a lady just for me like He did for Adam, but I will do all I ca to keep her away from apples!

Last edited by Mountain Goat on 05 Aug 2023, 7:13 am, edited 2 times in total.

Hmmm, have you looked around for a church that fits your personal take on Christianity? (You've talked about the latter quite a bit here on WP.)

Attending church as a way to find a partner is NOT a good idea if you don't actually believe in the church's particular belief system, but, if you do believe in it, a church is probably one of the best places for a heterosexual man to find potential partners, given that most churches are predominantly women.

I don't know whether this is true for serial killer fandoms generally, but, in the case of Charles Manson in particular, most (if not all) of his fans believe that he was wrongly convicted, that he was actually either innocent or, at worst, guilty of only a lesser crime. So they don't "just ignore the fact that the object of one's love is a serial killer"; they actively disagree with what they see as a miscarriage of justice.

I'm not a Charles Manson fan myself, but I think some of the arguments they make are valid. (I won't go into details here because it's off-topic, but, if anyone wants to discuss this, we can do so in PPR.)

Jerry is NOT a serial killer

I wouldn't date anyone who actually murdered people!

I can't remember why he is in prison but it has nothing to do with being a murderer

How did you first get to know him?

I agree that your description is more accurate.


Right, he was framed. He didn't do it. It's a miscarriage of justice.

Hey, are you 100% sure that he's still alive? I ask because I just read that the famous Jerry Brudos (the "Salem shoe-fetish killer") died in 2006. Maybe someone else in prison continued writing letters to you in Jerry's name after the real Jerry Brudos died in 2006.

Our family friend Debbie introduced us

We were pen pals first and that organically turned into a romantic relationship