AdrianB wrote:
IMHO:
It depends.
I think there -has- to have been a spark in the beginning for anything to evolve out of it (deliberate or unintentional).
It may just be that the spark hasn't had time to evolve because certain actions or happenings already defined the relationship, it may be that there wasn't any spark or it may also be that the spark is busy evolving and waiting for something to make it burst!
What you think probably depends on your current mood or state..
sarahstilettos wrote:
I've just been thinking... if I became friends with someone, rather than being their lover, it could be for a load of circumstantial reasons that say nothing about that person or my feelings for them. It could be that I'm in a relationship, dating, having an affair with, or am just plain obsessed with someone else. Or it could be that I'm not particularly looking for a boyfriend at that time in my life - working too hard, too stressed out at that time. So I would never have even thought about the suitability of this new person I just met. Or maybe I DID like them, but was simply too shy to say anything - maybe something they said or did gave me the impression I'd never be their type.
Circumstances could change, chemistry could develop. Its a small chance, but only because the chances of me being attracted to any given person are small.
I think both Sarahstilettos and AdrianB both bring up important points.
If there is absolutely no attraction of any sort in the beginning, then the chance of having a relationship that is anything but platonic is not very likely at all.
However, even though mutual attraction or interest may not be visible at first, that doesn't mean its not there. One or both of the people involved could be currently preoccupied or not considering a potential relationship at the time. If you aren't looking for something or someone, you won't notice them when they are first presented or introduced to you.
26 Dec 2007, 12:28 am
