How quickly do you get obsessed with your major crushes?

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Much too fast, and much too obsessively. The extent to which my mind has fixated, in the past, is truly shocking... and my imagination is way too overactive, filling in details I can't possible know, building this whole house of cards around a person.

Truly horrible!

Most girls aren't good enough for me so this almost never happens.

Developing a crush I suppose would require the presence of some woman in my life. My work environment is mostly male (I'm a programmer); the females are managers and business analysts and all tend to be married and a good five to ten or more years older than me at least. The gym I go to is mostly men, a few middle-aged to elderly women, and some high school-aged girls. Occasionally there might be a girl roughly in my age range at one of the Borders I go to, but I tend not to find the bookish types especially attractive (at least in terms of spontaneous attraction).

I'm very slow to even develop crushes (or any kind of feeling) in the first place... it usually takes a month at minimum, although it can take years...

It really puts a dent in my relationship-making abilities since I can't like a woman until long after she's moved on...

I get obsessed way too quickly, it can really put a dent in things...

It's especially frustrating if I hold things back to make things work, only to find out she is just dragging me along. People like that, I could only begin to imagine the horrible things that should happen to them. If you're not interested, just say so, because I'd rather not go through all this effort for nothing.

Sometimes I get really bad ones on people I barely know, and have trouble thinking about anything else. >.<

It's rare for me to get a really major one, though, so it's usually not that bad.

The first option. Length of time has ranged anywhere from a few weeks to 13 years.

It's hard to win me over, but once I do, I fall hard.

I know once I meet someone who feels as strongly about me as I do about them, I'll probably be with them forever. I'm an incredibly loyal person when it comes to loving someone.

Unfortunately the few times I have felt that strongly about someone, it was not reciprocated and it was really devastating. I seem incapable of having "casual" relationships - is that an Aspie trait?

I have to know the person-- I have a degree of face blindness so I've never felt obsessed at first "sight." Once I get to know the person, and the obsession begins, I'm doomed.

Read "What do you do when..." in the Haven for an example of what I am currently going through.