Girls are impossible

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Stalking is predatory behaviour, and it indicates the potential for more serioues crimes like assault, murder, rape, kidnapping, forcible confinement.

Someone who's just "observing" does not want to be found out. A stalker, OTOH, is an unbalanced indvidual who seeks a relationship with the target. If were an obsessed person stalking you, I would want you to know I'm stalking you.

So you're saying the difference is that the "stalker" wants the other person to know they are observing them in some manner, and the "not stalker" doesn't?

Yes. That's what I'm saying.

Anyway I've been speaking her several times on aim and a friend suggested that i ask for her phone number and talk to her on the phone. Is that a good idea?

Go for it!

So then someone who sends a message after they have "observed" someone else, say via whatever internetz implementation to someone else, saying something along the lines of "Hi, I recognized you from school but never had a chance to say hi, wouldya want to grab a cup of joe/etc." is stalker behavior, however if someone kills someone who they had "observed" w/o the person being "observed" ever knowing they were being "observed" they're a "not stalker"? I'll admit my examples are outlandish to say the least, but my point is that the metric you described doesn't seem to jive with what most people view as "stalking".

Don't overthink this Dustin, just ask her out!

If you are polite and considerate, there will be no problem. The worst thst can happen is that she will refuse, either rudely or politely. Depends on the person. Coffee is a good beverage because, unlike booze, it has no romantic overtones, no legal issues, and is usually more casual than going to some bar or club after dark.

"Going for coffee" is a foot in the door, so to speak, but it isn't really a date.

Oh and BTW, "stalking" implies something predatory and violent. You could say a hunter "stalks" a moose through the woods with the intent to kill it. If a human being "stalks" another human being, his motives are highly suspicious. Hunters always hunt; they never just watch or observe. Observers are always passive.

Now that I have stake in this, I want to know how it turns out.

Yes, but she doesn't have her own car... so how would that work? Would I pick her up, or have her parents drive her?

Traditionally, the guys drives the girl to & from the date. It doesn't matter if the girl has trasportation. It always looks better if the guy has a car, and what never looks right is for the girl to be driving the guy in her car.

If neither boy nor girl has transportation, public transportation is always good because it puts you on equal footing right away.

but it'd likely be just for one date.... so wouldn't it be a bit awkward to do all that meet the parents bs?

girls are impossible, but women are expensive...

good luck. take it slowly, and watch to see how she reacts...

Yea, my brain keeps telling me that I'm going to fail. Your a failure, she's going to hate you just watch. Then I'll look and see she wasn't as nice to me, then it's all over fo rme.