Page 2 of 2 [ 20 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

jkrane
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 737
Location: 39uqlksdj3ujadlskd

02 Apr 2008, 5:38 pm

I wouldn't tell her. Most people don't know what Asperger's is, so it might freak her out.

I sometimes use my Asperger's diagnosis in order to excuse minor errors in social conduct and awkwardness (which usually aren't my fault). But it always backfires, and they never end up calling/messaging me again.



kiwi
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 12 Oct 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 424
Location: the GARDEN city..

06 Apr 2008, 12:55 am

"well if you suffer from aspergers dont tell her...

but if you benefit from aspergers tell her :D"

2 pysches eh....

Most things/response are given by the way you pitch them...

Identify what she likes (eg movies) perhaps mention famous actors.. if she likes money say i get X amount for just having this label ...
or... i get people to do my exams for me.... (haha aka reader writer)

or etc...

But yea dont let her worry about it though!... yea... if thats possible... say lightheartedly... hmmm....
maybe suggest everyone who has it is effected differnetly not all the critera on the internet do I have etc...

hmm...

cool... good luck... your decision eh :D


_________________
queer creative in Australia


TheLadyMary
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 30 Mar 2008
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 27

06 Apr 2008, 2:30 am

I'm not sure I'd mention it unless you're seeing that your AS is causing problems between you two (communication problems for example). She might be more understanding if that is the case.

Now if you get serious with her and you want to have children someday, I'd tell her.



Hanwag
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 209

06 Apr 2008, 6:07 am

The most perfect answer to this whole issue is: it depends :).

One important thing to ask is what she already notices around you. Depending on the type of aspie you are and the relationship together she might feel you are awkward or inconsiderate in some situations where you are just missing clues. This might become worse in the future (when I was very much in love I was considerate all the way, later I wanted more time for myself). If she starts really noticing these things you should ask yourself if it is better if she blames it on your Aspergers or on the relationship?

The other important question is how she thinks about well crazy people ;). If she has bad experience with psychological problems or thinks everyone should be perfect telling her would be pretty much stabbing yourself. A lot of the girls I know have some experience in this area and would be understanding. My actual girlfriend has aspergers herself, so there was ofcourse no trouble there.

The third thing is how serious everything is. The more serious you are the better the chance she will accept it, but also the more important it would be to tell her. She can't live with you without noticing some things probably or else you would never get a diagnosis. And if you have children together they might be aspies as well. It is not ethical not to tell in that case. If you show here being an aspie is not all bad, she will probably accept the chance.

Bottomline: at one moment you must tell her. The moment should be based on where in the relationship you are. But if you want to be real serious don't make it too late.