Right track if you want to marry

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Why do the sexist threads get the most replies in the L&D forum?

You can't defuse a misogynist with logic or entreaty.

You can only have fun taunting him.

only desperate men go out of their way
to go to depressed areas to find a woman
to be their wives, instant slaves.
the public think lowly of these women
who subject themselves to these kinds
of relationships but in my opinion, it's the
men who are the scums...
what a sexist thing to do, it's like buying
someone. who does that? must have
some really low self esteem or a humungus
EGO! what a loser.

I may have been a desperate man, but I'm a desperate man with a good long term marriage and a family! The "public"" can think as low as they want. When they put it into action I respond with criminal charges, lawsuits, etc. As an Aspie, it's not like I have much to lose with the "public's" attitude to begin with. After becoming acclimated to life in the US, the only thing she asks is zero responsibility where she has zero authority .... fair enough.

She especially likes that I go ape with anyone that even begins to mess with her. She also likes that other women generally make me sick to my stomach given past experiences with "modern, liberated" women.

Misogynists aren't born, they are taught... almost always directly or indirectly by "modern, liberated" women.
Misogyny is the red-headed stepchild of misandry.

I wouldn't be surprised if few people here even know what misandry is. Just to prove the point, as I was typing this, the spell checker built into Firefox underlined misandry, because its dictionary doesn't recognize the word (I spelled it correctly). However, it did not tag misogyny as it recognized it without a problem. As Firefox is an international community-developed program, that in itself is as revealing of what our society really thinks about gender equality as any facts or figures I could throw out.

LoveableNerd,

I'm sometimes amazed at how quickly the not-so-past past is forgotten. It was only thirty years ago that women were generally not allowed to have jobs outside of teaching, secretarial work, nursing, and cooking (with rare exceptions, when the women came from an unusually enlightened family). Even if you managed to get a "male" job, you weren't accepted as competent and weren't able to move from one company to another. You would be met with outright hostility (which is where the term "harassment" in a work context comes from). Job want ads were separate. Men/Women. Women couldn't get credit cards on their own. I know this, because I lived it. It was only thirty years ago. Women were never in positions of power, and were expected to keep their opinions to themselves.

Women had no property rights in the US until the 1800s, especially married women. As recently as 1970:

Throughout most of human history women have been property. Why wouldn't that engender some animosity towards males? You have no idea what it was like. "Women's lib" does not equal misandry (and yes, I already knew the meaning of the word).

Women's Property Rights Discussion

PS I am red-haired.

The go-to-Latin-America approach works very well if you're a middle-class or upper-class white American (well, if you're rich enough it doesn't matter if you're black, white, yellow, green, or invisible) and all you want is an all-in-one maid/live-in prostitute/live-in-nanny rather than an actual relationship, as there is no shortage in Latin America of airheads looking for a white American caveman, just don't delude yourself into thinking they like you for you rather than as a status symbol/source of income.
Frankly, some of us aren't looking for that. I know that type of woman and would much rather stay single. I'm not looking for a woman to boss me around or a misandrous one but I'm not looking for a servant either.

So, you are agreeing with me that... old school misogyny (paternalist society) gave birth to a form of misandry (some animosity you admit), which in turn gave birth to more misogyny (the current backlash against feminist political correctness)? You must see that this is a potential downward spiral of animosity with no end in site. This is why we were all taught long ago that two wrongs don't make a right. However, in this case three wrongs do take us further to the left.

No disrespect meant to redheads of course, lol. I got my point across though. Were women wronged in the past? Of course they were. This isn't aimed at you personally - you come from a different generation that had some legitimate gripes that you fought hard against. I am talking about the current generation, who seem to be more than happy to cash in on what your generation fought for, but also tend to be less and less willing to take the responsibility that comes along with it to pull their own weight.

That being said, I wouldn't consider myself anything close to a misogynist (unless my resentment of the BS treatment I get from a lot of women counts as misogyny). However, I will admit I used to be a bit misaNThropist growing up, having been discriminated against due to being aspie and not even knowing what an aspie was. So I know how hatred and misunderstanding breeds more hatred and misunderstanding. Wouldn't it be better if we all tried to understand and respect each other?

I don't know how your Aspie traits manifest themselves, but my wife was patient enough to get used to all my "rituals" like melting down if I can't watch Andy Griffith, getting depressed for a whole day if my favorite chair was moved and a hundred more things like this. She learned most of my traits and used that information to avoid "pushing my buttons". I don't care why she does it. All I know is that it has lasted a number of years now and I DON'T CARE WHY SHE DOES IT.

And by the way ... if you called my wife a prostitute to my face, you'd wake up in Fat Lip, Arizona!

You're mighty brave behind that keyboard, you little dweeb.

BTW .... you say you're a student: What? You can't find a job.

Oh, bosh. Do some reading, please, on how women have been treated throughout most of Western history, and how they still are treated over much of the planet.

Some of the recent manifestations of misogyny in our culture are probably backlash against extreme feminism, but misogyny has been a sad and terrible part of most of human existence since WAY before any of that.

And btw, I'm red-headed too.

I'm not denying that. Please read my follow up post.



That is where I was going with my argument.



Yes, but that is hardly the reality in the western world today. Case in point, we have a woman running for President that is getting the most votes from the older generation, men included. If the old-school misogyny were still around in any meaningful capacity, wouldn't that demographic be the one it was most prevalent in?

Ironically, the old attitudes were slowly disappearing in the Middle East as well, until the US decided to force change on them and empowered the extreme fundamentalist backlash.



I have nothing against redheads, lol. I'd say I think redheads are hot, but you'd probably think I was being sexist.

I just have a problem with political correction, particularly as it applies to me. As a straight, white male who comes from a Christian tradition, there are a lot of individuals who are part of groups that have been historically oppressed that bear animosity against me, but I have done nothing to deserve this. I fail to see much difference between that undeserved animosity and the original prejudice that they were fighting against.

It was in the past. It sucks. I wish it didn't happen but it did. I didn't have anything to do with any of it, and I wasn't even around for most of it. If it's any consolation, I do have an inkling of what they went through because aspies are discriminated against just for being themselves, usually with no idea why unless they are lucky enough to have been born in or after the 90's when the DX was available. If I can look past it and forgive all the NT's who made my life miserable growing up, because they didn't know any better and just went along with the herd mentality of the time... well, I don't think a little forgive and forget and let go of animosity against generalized groups is too much to ask of individuals who are part of other oppressed groups, historical or current.

The worst part of political correctness is, if I even so much as voice my opinion on this matter, I run the risk of being called homophobic, xenophobic, racist, sexist, whatever-ist. So when Tailfins voiced his opinion that South American women make better wives because they have not been affected by the self-centered, materialist memes of consumerist culture to the degree of North American and European women -- granted he blamed it all on feminism while that is only a part of it I think -- he was denounced as a misogynist for it. Labeling people as bigots without considering their arguments on their own merits has a tendency to stifle debate, and is having a chilling effect on free speech throughout the world.

I for one, have to side with Voltaire... I may not agree with a word you say, but I would defend to the death your right to say it.

Depends - do they have beer and backyard volleyball? Without the backyard volleyball its definitely a no go.

Whether "provoked" or not, neither misogyny nor misandry is justifiable when you know better. Sure, you have the freedom to say it, just as I have the freedom to insist that the world is "flat"... but neither one has any place in a rational debate. Now, I'll admit that I'm not perfect... I have been both misogynist AND misandrist at times (as well as anti-humans, anti-NT's, anti-carbon-based-life-forms, and even anti-Aspies), but this is mostly due to emotions, not reason. It's part of human nature to make gross generalizations, but one should try to keep an "open mind" and not let those generalizations limit one's thinking.

The point of my original post is that if you're alone, tired of begging women to like you, there is a good short cut. All I'm saying is the equivalent of "jump in, the water's fine"!


Having said that, it's just a short cut past the starting gate. Once you get there, you still have to earn the relationship through hard work and playing by the rules. You will be confronted with other challenges, but they are challenges that are not made more difficult by being an Aspie. There is no expectation to be "cute and entertaining", just patient, reliable and a willingness to "carry" someone who starts off nearly helpless. However, things progress little by little. For example, it took five years for my wife to be able to drive a car. She still can't fill out forms and still speaks little English. These challenges are still far better than having to be an entertainer for a demanding feminist.

Actually, I'd commend you for your excellent taste.



Yup, and as a woman, there are guys who bear animosity against me for being one, and I've done nothing to deserve that either.

Sucks both ways, but it doesn't really help to say misogyny results from women hating men.

For one thing, I quite like men, yet I've borne the brunt of misogyny on a number of occasions.

For another, if misogyny is caused by women hating men -- which in turn is ALSO women's fault -- then both misogyny AND misandry are women's fault. That's a pretty extreme position, yet I've seen it expressed in various ways on these forums before. I don't like it and I'll speak up when I see it, pace Voltaire.



I think the misogyny charges resulted more from quotes like this:



Dunno about you, but I spot more than a little hostility towards my gender in those posts.

The materialism bit is a red herring. It's the submissiveness he likes.

Which is fine: I'm open-minded, and to each his own. It's the contempt for women who don't fit his preferences that's annoying.

Because women are evil and all men are bastards....