The Female Conspiracy

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It is a conspericy. See my post on 'why this happens to me". If the same stuff happens with different women, I feel women were send from Hell just to mess with guys.

At any rate she doesnt seem like a good option. I think you need someone intelligent, not someone who makes others do their homework for them because they dont want to think.

Last edited by zen_mistress on 10 Aug 2008, 4:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.

For this thread title alone, I'm going to go and have a shotgun mouthwash.

Girls don't conspire to do anything. They're too busy fighting each other.

Do you think that maybe she's saying odd things because she's flirting? Girls do that sometimes. They'll saystuff just to throw you. Stick in there, and stay positive. But act like you already have a gf. Girls love that.

I hate this phrase, but I don't have a better one.

Perhaps you need to "get over it" to the point where one conversation isn't messing with you--where a single conversation couldn't be messing with you. If what you are looking for is a relationship, not just sex, one conversation is barely thinking about dipping your toes in. If it doesn't go well, it doesn't go well. . . try again. It wasn't anything.

If you are just looking for sex, that's a bit of a dilemma. You unfortunately don't have the right to access anybody else's body, and there are a limited number of options for people who choose to pursue that particular--I personally think very shallow--goal. . . if I were in that place, I perhaps might re-evaluate my priorities.

It is not a conspiracy. What you have to realize is that you came on too strong, in both cases. You have to realize that you're trying too hard to get the fantasy world to be like the real world. that isn't going to happen. You need to grow up and you also need to stop thinking about relationships.

I'm not going to be rude here, but you do need to get over this whole thing, because you're making yourself into the victim, you're not. You're someone who needs to know how to play the game, cause you're being a little cry baby about it, because you're not getting your way.

I'm a woman who has had to shoot down what seems to me to be unsolicited male interest after very short conversations. Most recently, it was a MVA victim who had been DUI of psychiatric meds - and he was saying it was the Dr's fault for prescribing them to him!
I was trying to be nice to the guy - I was just in the room to get blood from him, was trying to make it as painless as possible, trying to treat him like a human being despite his mistakes - and he wants to 'get together sometime after all of this is over.'
His wife was a passenger in the car he was driving, and was strapped to a backboard in the room across the hall.

So-
What?
I show an ounce of humanity and guys think that I'm coming on to them or playing psychological tricks?

I have AS. I can't play the game because I can't see the signs. People need to be honest with each other. I'm frustrated because I have done nothing wrong and I still get treated like crap. When the same thing happens to me all the time, what am i suposted to think? That its me and i'm screwed up. If I don't have someone by next march i'm going to end it and tell everyone why in my note. It will be because how women like to screw with people.

That is a different situation. Its not like you were friends or knew him from work or something. You were at work and doing your job. You have every right to reject someone in this situation. If the guy keeps it up, let your boss know. You are not coming on to them you are doing your job.

KenM, you're not alone. 'Conspiracy' does seem over the top, nevertheless there has been a media trend over the last 40 years - our lifetimes - to belittle men and elevate women.

Take a look at http://www.angryharry.com. There are many women in the West who have a total attitude of entitlement and they don't care what lies they have to tell to get what they want. If you think findinga relationship as a man is bad, wait to see what's in store for you when you're married.

Gamester, while I don't disagree with everything you say, I do think you're going over the top on keep repeating that the reason all these AS men get rejected is "because they came on too strong". For a man with AS, the opposite is more likely true. I agree that the problem is more likely to be with the AS male than EVERY female, but coming on too strong is not the problem. I've been rejected many times in similar situations and invariably the woman involved has remarked that they didn't think I was interested in them at all.

What's so wrong about a man being interested in sex? The succesful men are the ones who are not ashamed of this interest and don't feel the need to hide it for fear of upsetting the delicate little girlies. Having been friends with NT males who are accepted by women, they seem to very quickly realise when they have a chance or not. If not, they move on to the next one in seconds. When they spot that they have a chance, they come on very strong and this isn't a problem as it's making the women's role easier, she's not having to risk rejection.

What? uhm.........

When a women is shareing part of her life story with you, she is getting personal with you, and trusting you, and trying to bond with you. Not stabbing you in the back. How did you conclude that she was conspireing by shareing part of herself with you, I don't get it. Mess with you? How?

That was my first thought. She started telling you a story about her past. How do you know, unequivocally, that it was made up and that she made it up with the intention of "messing" with you? Some people have strange pasts, maybe she was opening up to you but you perceived it otherwise.

This reminded me of something from English class once. One topic was communication between members of a married couple. The male supposedly, would think that if his female partner were talking about how she feels about the relationship, then to him there was a problem, but to the female there was no problem with the marrege she was just wanting to discuss it. One guy in my class agreed. Just saying, I will leave the thread now, if fighting or debate doesn't pull me back. Heheh.

Hey KenM you really need to take a step back and look at what you are saying.

Conpiracies and talking about ending it all. You don't sound like you are in a good place right now.

No women are not all evil. Some are evil, some are really nice and there is a mixture of in between. Just the same as the male population.

Some women do lead men on and reject them just for a self-esteem boost, which I don't think is right. But that is how it is.

My advice to you is why not try and be happy being single, keep trying to find a girlfriend if it happens it happens, which is great. If it doesn't then you need to except that.

These women you talk about that are not interested in you. Would you like them to be with you even though they are not interested in you? IF someone is not interested in you, you need to move on, just like if you are not interested in someone they need to move on. Would you want a relationship with someone that you were not interested in??

Also try and be the best you can, that way you become more attractive. We only have so much control over certain things like looks and intellegents, etc.. But where you can improve do so, you can certainly work on your attitude.

Also where you cannot improve that is out of your control and it is not you fault, don't beat yourself up about it because it won't do you any good. There is no harm working on your faults though.

This kind of thing is the proof that as far as relating goes, man & women occupy totally different universes. Most women are regularly 'approached' by men in some way. They get so used to it they regard it as an irritation.

Men on the other hand....Well, very good looking and very obviously wealthy men may get approached. But for your average Joe, let alone your geeky Aspie, unsolicited approaches from women are rarer than Halley's comet. (please tell me it's not just me..... )

My other point is that because there are in fact 2 dating games, 1 for each gender, men should never ever listen to advice from women. When younger, I had a phase of many years of having close female friends but no girlfriends. And the mistake I made was actually listening to advice from these girls. Advice such as "just wait for the right person", which is fine for a girl with at least 2 or 3 men are hitting on you every single day. But totally useless for a less than verage looking male. I'd have waited till beyond my deathbed...

I guess my point is that it's pointless denying that at least with initiating (and casual flings), the females have the advantage. It's also pointless complaining about it as it's just the way things are.

I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you. And then all the card-carrying members of the Women Conspiring Club would kill me.

So it's better you go through life being jerked around. Don't listen to any of these people saying there's anything you can do to improve your approach or anything - they're in our employ.