So Aspie gals don't want Aspie guys. Do Aspie guys have a ch

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Just let it go, he says so much Rubbish stuff that it dosnt make sense.
Like hale linked, in one thread he says
Something, and in another he says something that goes against what he just stated here. My bet, no girl ( even Aspie girls) dont want today him, and he thinks that's how it is in general?

Ah, I should've known given the username.... /:

I find it interesting that you're upset by Kilroy's generalizations but not by the other "positive" ones here. Shouldn't you be just as offended by the persons indicating that they'd rather date AS rather than NT? They're stereotyping both groups.

I firmly believe that you're much better off throwing yourself into social situations and finding people you like - rather than filtering out potential mates/friends based on AS/NT. There's so much inconsistancy in how medical professionals interpret the DSM - it seems rather impossible to use that as a basis for friendship.

I wouldn't generalise, most aspie girls wouldn't mind dating aspie guys.

although I bet that most of them would choose a NT over an aspie in a ski mask...

If people don't want to date Aspies I don't care, they are the ones making the mistakes then not us. I got mad because he generalizes that alot to all aspies are selfish and etc. And while he does generalize them and points his finger, he dosnt even bother to say WHY they migth be the way they are. Nope, from what I've seen him say it's "Hey, we've got AS, let's be selfish jerks from now on"
But that's not how it is.

And about dating AS/NT
In the end, the one you fall in love with matters, not if they are AS or NT

He said "a lot of aspie guys" and "From what I've seen" so that's doesn't mean he meant all of you. He had a lot of bad experience with aspies online so he hardly talks to any now.

An aspie talks to you about their obsessions but they don't let you do the same to them in return because "its boring" and when you tell them why can't you talk about your obsessions to them but they can to you, they say you're selfish. That's one example there.

He was just venting out his frustrations. If what he said wasn't true about you, then he wasn't talking about you.

To the OP, the longer that you wallow in your self pity and hopelessness, the less of a chance you have at ever finding anyone NT or not.

I know. That's why I said that it's good he said alot and not everyone ( but feels that way from seeing him generalize so much all the time)

And it really does deppend on what the subject is. Yeah I'm an aspie and I love to talk about the things I like, however, if the person I am talking with has interesting things to talk about I also listen to their stuff.
Example, my friend vin, me and him have alot of the same interests and stuff, so I can easely listen to him and not feel bored.
However my other friend named silas, he's very NT'ish in the typical sense, party, girls ( they almost swarm around him) hip-hop/ "gangsta" music and stuff, when I am with him I am bored cause we are way out of sync, only friends with him cause we are childhood friends.
And then there is another guy, he has TOTALLY different interests mostly, I think he said he was a new raver or something, and he is really interesting to listen to.

Again, don't generalize everyone <.<
or think everyone is the same, Kilroy had some bad luck with other aspies I guess

I am an NT mom of a PDD-NOS Son. The more I learn about my son, and the more I read this website I realize that my husband is most likely AS or HFA. This explains so many things. I am his third wife and the beginning of our relationship was very hard. I felt he was distant, insensitive to my feelings, didn't really care about things I cared about, only things that he cared about, and he didn't care enough to listen because he would forget whole conversations. We ended up going to marriage counceling to work on our communication (which helped). I just couldn't get him to talk about anything, and if we couldn't talk we couldn't fix anything between us.

I wish I would have known about autism/AS back then. I understand so much now, and I don't take these things personally anymore. He has trouble with empathy, he doesn't understands things he has not experienced himself so he doesn't always respond in the way that I may need, but it's not because he's insensitive and uncaring, he definately has auditory processing problems and is very literal, it's not because he's not listening, it's because he doesn't understand and is afraid to ask for clarification, or he understands what I say differently than I intend and I don't realize that. He hates it when I repeat myself, but he has trouble with pragmatic language and gives me NOTHING to say he understands, so I had to encourage him to verbalize to clarify understanding. All of these things are hard for us because we are wired so differently, but we work hard to change what we can and work around things that are pretty rigid. This goes both ways.

Whether or not he has AS, we work hard to work out our differences and understand each other. Knowing about autism makes it so much easier for us to communicate and work things out because I am coming from a different perspective and I am much more respectful of his aspie like traits than I was before. That said, people AS or NT need to commit to working things out. At least in the United States, everyone is looking for something better, easier...greener grass, and that may be a lot of the problem. not so much AS/NT.

It is hard to find the right person, and all of you are so young. You have so much time, and people mature. I wish for all of you that you find that person that understands you, and that you work to help whoever you are with to do that, if that is what you really want. Call me naive, but there have to be people out there for you.

Last edited by MommyJones on 14 Jan 2009, 2:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

it's because most aspies girls don't want guys who live in other countires/continents who are probably can't be reached....and vice verso.

You're talking as if AS people makes a large non-dispersed population....

I saw several times elsewhere on WP Aspie women saying that they wouldn't want to date Aspie men. I don't remember the topics they were from anymore. That's why I started to believe that Aspie women didn't want Aspie men. I guess the Aspie women who said the above were merely a niche.

I don't think he has self pity I think he likes making fun of us....

You misconstrue!

Oh my, I forgot that the aspie females on this website talked for ALL the aspie women out there. How could I not have logicaly seen the connection Between a few ignorant aspie women and the rest of the whole worlds aspie girls?

/ sarcasm off

Logic, do you know what that is?
2+2 = 4, NOT 5 because a few people say so.

That's probably my pet peeve on the site. People see AS individuals say something and they think that all Aspies are like this. Likewise, they experience something from an NT individual and believe that's an "NT thing".

This thread is a perfect example of that.

I know, and yet people are told so often that generalizing isn't good cause you blindy state something, that's way bigger than what you can picture.

Saying " all blacks are just trouble making gangsters who deal with drugs" would not only be WRONG, but you also turn the blind eye to all those who actualy aren't like that, heck, sometimes it's even the minority of people who get generalized from a big group.

Like in, let's say i've met 5 people from something, like say French people.
And they were all 5 of them snobish people. I can't just then asume that every French person is a snob, just from a experience with a minority part from a majority as a whole.

And well the general idea now IS that people think french people are snobs, while I bet there are so many who aren't.


Dunno if I made any sense at all here, I tend to get confusing at times and repeat myself <_<