something extremely shallow that's bothering me

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This part if your post alone shows that you're a lost cause and that there's no point trying to explain this to you.

You don't deserve this 'chubby' girl.

Are you implying that all obese people skip showers and don't use deodorant?

OK? Go ahead and explain it. I'm all ears.

So much irony in this thread....

In a way it sort of reminds me of the movie Shallow Hal. /:

I was drawing a comparison, but having said that, extremely fat people are kind of stinky.

Even a fat person that showers daily and practices good hygiene?

Why don't you go f*** a few? Do your own research.

Report back to me. I expect line graphs and bar charts.

You're not really helping... if I'm at least making an effort to practice good hygiene, and people like you still write me off as "stinky" because of weight, why should I even bother practicing good hygiene to begin with?

I don't know you and obviously didn't realise you were overweight. Sorry if you've taken offence. But to be blunt, if you're extremely overweight, it can be quite difficult to smell nice, even if you bathe and use deodorant.

But, as I say, I haven't met you, so you could smell like a meadow in spring for all I know.

Anyway, you're a Yank. You'd probably tear me to shreds about my english teeth.

No harm done... that was just a misunderstanding...


Oh, believe me, I know... but I still try... I'm bad enough to look at, I at least want to not add a bad smell to the equation...


Nah, nothing that rosy... for all I know I probably do smell like crap despite my efforts... but going "why don't you go f**k a fatty" sounded particularly demeaning to me... I don't blame you for it (again, there was a bit of a misunderstanding), but I have enough problems finding women as it is with or without the weight issues...

Great! I love graphs and bar charts, especially about fatty f-ing.

Roadgames, you are way too hard on yourself, dude. You're on the right path, but stressing too much on your own physical factors and physical factors in general. You are not broken, you're just being too much of a perfectionist on that.

The fact is that there's no guaranteed lay, and I have been turned down by women way below my tier for any variety of reasons, including them not being secure enough in themselves, sensing I wasn't that sincere or into them, or just not into my personality or look. Just because someone you think is less good-looking that you are rejects you (and you could be right about their looks in comparison to yours) doesn't mean that they automatically are lay-able by you. Taste is so relative, and the woman I crush on the most at work is thought to be very mediocre by everyone else's standands, yet I'm friggin obsessed with her and find her so attractive. Meanwhile, everyone else finds her unattractive. We're all different.

The other part of this is the reason why I asked your age -- women tend to be very in demand (more so than normal) probably the first 10 years of their lives or so after hitting puberty. It's a "seller's market," and they're the seller. So someone like the girl you mention probably has a lot of guys up on her already, or thinks she does. I say this like a broken record here, but the balance of power really does shift later in life, and suddenly normal guys with jobs become as popular as teenage girls, dating-wise.

Oh yeah, I have the english teeth too thanks to my heritage (my dad was one of those european latinos, born in south america, but to a british father and scottish mother), and to make matters worse my parents decided that getting orthodontist on the dental plan would cost too much, so I never had braces either...

f**k it. Tell him the truth. You shouldnt have asked her out in the first place. f**k her

Never too late to get braces....

Norm MacDonald had a line about how "all your credibility is in your two front teeth." It's kinda true, at least here in the U.S.

I guess I should be alright then... my two front teeth are the only straight ones in my body...

I think all the people chiming in with "fat girls can be attractive too!" are missing the point. Yes, I think we all have seen women with bodies on the large side who were still cute. On the other hand, I think we could all agree that obesity for either gender is not considered a positive trait by the average person.

I see the OP's post as mainly a rant against how choosy many women are as to the guys they physically get involved with. There are certainly cases where I would greatly enjoy sex with a woman who doesn't really fit my ideal of "hot", yet is at least slightly attractive, provided that we really "click" on a personality level. While women harp on and on about wanting to be liked for themselves as people rather than as bodies, it is doubtful to what extent they base their sexual choices on who their guy partners are as people.

A lot of guys, myself included, are annoyed at how much harder it is for many women to accept guys as sex partners relative to as friends. And sometimes, as it seems to be the case for the OP, to some girls "friends" means mostly "people to b***h to". Most guys wouldn't even get away with a friendship based solely on this among each other, even though willingness to lend an ear is likely part of the "deal" in any friendship.

For me, if I'd consider being good friends with a girl, there's a quite good chance I'd also be physically interested in her, if for nothing more than curiosity about how our personal connection would play out on a sexual level. Now, that doesn't mean I'd necessarily (or even likely) want a long-term romantic relationship with her. The "chubby" girl referred to by the OP obviously liked the OP as a person, but rejected him sexually. I think the "insult" is that for this girl, who the OP was as a person was not enough for her to even get past a first date without writing him off sexually, though presumably she would want that from a guy (rather than him writing her off immediately based on her not looking stereotypically beautiful).