Still haven't found a girlfriend

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I Have realized i am 24 and still in College. I started college when i was 20 so have now had 4 years there. I don't think i will find a girlfriend while at college.

But this is the thing, 2020 the next decade is only 3 years away and i do not want to be still living with my mum and my stepdad by then. I would like to find a job and either be living on my own, living with a future girlfriend or even living with my mates. I am entering my 25th year now and do not want to be living with my stepdad and my Mum for much longer. I want to learn to drive, lose weight, become more independent from them and perhaps I can invite them over for a xmas dinner in the future.

I think i need to do this for my sake and no one else. I am 24. I want to live my own life

Most people do. Just remember that the key to winning friends and influencing people is living for the pleasure of other people and NOT for yourself.

It's not a popular idea. Everyone says be yourself, be you, whatever. Leaders live for those they lead while relying on followers to meet their needs. Wealthy people, corporate leaders, etc. are really the neediest people on the planet because of the numbers of people they depend on. What you are doing is taking the lead in forming relationships, which is why I fall back on leadership principles.

Reciprocity is the name of the game. You will always be dependent on others. You just need to put together a team to get you where you want to go. You need to get someone to teach you to drive and get you to/from a job. Since you're in school, this might be difficult and take a long time, but there you go. You need the job so you can buy a beater, get your own place, and save up some emergency cash. Get to know girls along the way, and be open about what you're doing. They'll respect that and like you. Why? Because they'll see potential for what they can get out of you. So your team includes: Employer, family/friends/coworkers to help with transportation, landlord, used car salesman, friends to help you practice socializing, girls to help you practice conversing and dating.

As you assemble your team, take care of them FIRST. Your employer is helping you be financially independent, so make sure everything you do is from excellent to superior quality. Your mum is giving you rides, a place to live, and food to eat, so cut her in on your paycheck. Friends are taking time to talk to you. Buy them lunch or indulge their hobbies/special interests (I actually did pay a small group of church volunteers from a bonus that I was paid. They deserved more, but I gave all I had). Buy fuel once a week if you're depending on friends to get to work. Pay rent early, send birthday and Christmas cards to take care of your landlord--he's helping you live independently. Take care of your car salesman, he cut you a deal. Buy gifts for girls as is appropriate--they are taking time out of their day and life to spend with you.

Look at them all as members of your team helping you WIN. Always share your success with your team and give them credit for your winning. THEY are the real winners. All you wanted was a gf to take home to mum over Christmas, but look back and see how much good you did for others on the way to reaching your goal. Look back, and smile.

Ok, time for the teacher to give an assignment. Read the following wiki and answer the questions below:

Raven Davis wikipedia

1. Is Raven Davis male or female?
2. Does the wiki article indicate this in any clear way? (Yes/No)
3. What clues does the article give to support your answer for #2?
4. Is there a dire necessity in everyday communication to use gender-identifying language? (Yes/No)
5. Regarding your answer to #4, why/why not?

Discuss.

I allow people to address me with the pronoun they feel most comfortable with. I'll answer to male or female.

If that confuses or annoys you, I don't particularly care.

Your discomfort with shades of grey and nuance is not my problem.

I think it would have been great fun to see Outrider at the NYE party I was at all night. Over 400 people.. and many of them are quite the gender benders.. trans people, drag queens, alllll kinds. Although, Outrider's brain mmmaaaay have exploded.

I Will Angel. This year is going to be the change that i really needed and wanted. 2016 had been crap but 2017 and beyond will be fantastic and in the next few years I hope i will be in a relationship

IMO the very best relationship eveeryone needs to foster is the one they have with themself. Treat yourself as well as you would your best friend, or a significant other, or family member etc. That includes in every way. Make sure the thoughts you think and things you say to and about yourself are as nice as they would be about others you care about. Make sure to fuel yourself with healthy food like you care about your own well being. Make sure to exercise your body so it becomes healthier and stronger. Make sure to treat yourself every now and again just like you would others.

These things have been a bit of a struggle for me in the past and I find myself thinking of what one of my closest friends would do - and usually decide that he would do the nicest thing for himself, so, so should I for myself. I literally think "WWJD?" noooo.. not the religious "what would jesus do?" but rather, "what would Joshua do?" whenever I am at a crossroads of this sort.. and I know the answer is always the healthiest most self loving thing, so, then I'll go for that run because I deserve to be healthier, or will indulge in that small treat because WTF why not? hah.

Once you have an ever-better relationship with yourself, you'll be more and more ready to have friendships and relationships with others. Others won't be able to quite put their finger on what it is about you that makes you someone they'd befriend, but I guarantee that anyone who has a positive relationship with themselves is definitely friend/relationship material! I can't think of a single person I know who mistreats themselves who is someone I want to be around.. whereas, without being narcissistic or arrogant, people who are good to themselves are also good to and for others and are the types I want to be around.

I hope this is of value to you and others reading it.

I know where my Stepbrother met his girlfriend now anyway, he has cmt so he met her at a CMT weekend so i suppose that is what drew them together. Still i think CMT is better then autism because it dose not seem to affect the mind only the outside like their feet and hands.

What is CMT?

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Charcot-Ma ... ction.aspx

Oh, that's horrible! I'm very sorry to hear. No, it doesn't affect the mind so much. William Lane Craig I THINK has that.

@goldfish: it's kinda like muscular dystrophy

Interesting. Never heard of it. Sounds like the symptoms might present like very mild muscular dystrophy in appearance.

Here, the only thing I can think of the acronym CMT meaning is "Country Music Television" - a TV channel.

At least you've shared where your brother met his gf. Kinda makes me think you ought to be less jealous of him, really, as he met her at a particular interest group vs. just randomly meeting someone in public. It should maybe give you a little hope that you might meet someone in a similar way, too. Like maybe one day you'll find yourself reading about some travel destinations in a local travel agent's shop and you might just meet some cute girl who's daydreaming about going to the same place. Or maybe someone at some sort of autism meet up group. Or or or.. these things happen, your brother is living proof!

I think he'd be glad to just meet anyone at all. I agree, though, that he should feel inspired.

CMT can certainly cause problems, but it doesn't seem to be quite the most debilitating disease, like, say, MS. I don't imagine it's much fun, though.

How do i know weather the girl is single i mean if i go up to her and say hi, oh i would love to go there to, fancy a drink i would stand no chance.

I also don't want to find a girlfriend who has really major disabilities i want someone i can show to meet my family and some girls like this drama i went to had major disabilities such as down syndrome and could not even speak

The same way anyone would find out.. conversation. Unless, of course, she's wearing an engagement or wedding ring - then you know she's taken. Otherwise you have to do what everyone else does and engage in normal conversations, and then eventually you'll figure out whether she's single or not.. either she'll mention a significant other, or if you were to ask her out she may decline and say her boyfriend wouldn't like that much etc. People don't walk around with signs above their head saying their relationship status. (That's what Facebook is for lol) So, in order to find out you have to do it the same way everyone always has... interact with people, have conversations, learn about them.. pay attention to what they say and whether it indicates whether they are single or not, or interested in you or not. It's not rocket surgery stuff. Sure, it can be nerve wracking if you've never so much as talked to a girl before, but so what? You'll make mistakes, and learn from them, and try again the next time you have an opportunity to chat someone up.

I Have been at college today. Maybe i am not as ugly as i think because some girls do say hi to me. I mean i would not do anything or stand a change because the majority of them are 16-18 and i'm 24 but it is good isn't it.