DOES ALL MALE WITH ASPERGER'S DESIRE SEX?

Post Reply New Topic

^^^ This.

most males (and girls, tbh) in general desire sex.

its not for everyone, however. this being said, have you tried it, by chance? it really is quite fun, and it feels great for most people. its nothing you should rush into, obviously. personally, my rule is: love before sex. having sex with someone you dont love isnt nearly as good as sex with someone whom you love with all of your heart.

just.. set boundaries, yanno? go as slow as you feel comfortable with!

and, its really not something to look down on people for doing. after all, its a natural part of life. it would be about as logical as me scowling at you for eating a hamburger because i hate hamburgers. it just doesnt make much sense, and really only hurts you.

That really only makes sense if we pretend the impulses of billions, and their tendency to act on them,
don't affect anyone but themselves,
as opposed to the entire world, in various ways.

Sex isn't objectively "fun", nor do people who lack sexual desire usually feel a need to "try it", any more than those who flat-out aren't interested in knitting or racquetball need to try those things.

Sex is great and fun to do

I'm male. Masturbation works way better for physical pleasure than sex, for me. It's fast, it's reliable (ie orgasm is more or less guaranteed), performance is not an issue, and I have complete control over it. I can stop without having to explain anything, and it's just so much easier, physically speaking.

I have sex with my wife regularly nonetheless. Having sex with someone else may be a bit more intense than masturbation, but given the greater physical effort, physical and psychological coordination required, lack of control over the experience, and so on, it would hardly be worth it just for venting a physical tension, when you could just masturbate instead. So why? Simple: physical pleasure aside, its the ultimate expression of acceptance and affirmation. Without it, I wouldn't be sure of myself in the relationship, and there would be a distance between us. And that's really the only reason. It's not something males are supposed to admit, but purely physically, I could do without it, I'm not that great at it, and I don't find it as enjoyable as everyone seems to claim (on a purely physical level, that is). All that is beside the point, though.

Yes, sometimes it does seem disgusting, I can't say I feel that way at all times but in certain modes I do. I can't relate to feeling that way *all* the time though. I think what you're experiencing is an effect of cognitive dissonance. The classic example of cognitive dissonance comes from a story in Aesop's Fables. A fox sees some grapes hanging from a branch, and tries to get them. He can't reach them, which creates the cognitive dissonance, so he tells himself he didn't want them, a new cognition which resolves the previous dissonance. If you're not having any luck romantically - or if, perhaps, it fails to meet your expectations - cognitive dissonance is a likely outcome, and it would probably take the shape of your brain attempting to convince itself it's not interested.

I don't understand why anyone is "hurting" you if they don't share your opinion/preferences. If I hated toast, but nobody else did, I wouldn't feel they were trying to harm me - they just don't share that perception. I don't get where the "hurting" comes in.

wow i see alot of people with different aspects of sex. really interesting. thanks for feed back. i

never seen it that way. yeah i think it's whether you want to get into a woman's body and intense it or just not do it period.

Ive never got off during sex, physically speaking masturbation is better. but women like sex, you have to enjoy it for what its worth. Giving a girl pleasure doesn't make you happy? If nothing else i just like being able to sleep next to them afterwards. Its all what you make it.

I know this is a necro'ed thread from 4 years back, but I still want to address some of the ideas expressed in the OP, as I've seen it elsewhere as well:

I take umbrage when people declare sexuality as shallow. Such a contention is ludicrous. Zoologically speaking, sex is the single most important facet of existence, as it can result in the propagation of the species.

By what factually verifiable position, then, can sexuality be considered shallow?

Having a personal philosophy of asexuality does not by any objective capacity render one superior to those who engage in sex.

If you don't want others to approach you from a sexual perspective, then the onus is on you to inform others of your asexual status(exceptions apply, of course). It's essentially like being a vegan and getting invited to a BBQ by a stranger: if you want to be able to eat acceptable food at the gathering, you'd better let them know.