How many of you are on OKcupid?

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I sympathize.

Ask someone to help you improve your profile and take good pics. I think having a more interesting profile is more important than which site you join.

My experience was similar. I wasted a lot of time on my profile, especially the questions. This was partly because I am not sure what I am looking for, particularly with regards to what things should be "deal breakers" or "red lines". (E.g. drug use, religion, children?) It also does not help that most people seem to put very little thought into their responses to the questions, and what they allow as an acceptable response by the other person. The end result is the "match", "friend" and "enemy" percentages are of very limited use. Moreover, I am rather quiet and asocial, whereas dating involves going out, having conversations, and sharing activities. I suspect that I am just too introverted and/or autistic to date.

Deactivated my OkCupid profile. It was stressing me out somewhat

I'm on OKCupid only to look at what's out there, not pursue a relationship. Frankly I don't get responses because of my writing style (apparently i have to act fake or stupid to get responses. I know this cos I tested it) and I find it toxic to just play the silly games people want me to play there.

Yes, you have to act cocky.

And you need to flirt her pics smartly, in a way to make anyone blushes. That often worked for me, at least in getting responses.

I did, but I deleted my profile tonight after a month of nothing but people I have no interest in visiting my profile. I just got too discouraged. I've come to realize I'm never going to find what I want, and since I refuse to settle, I'll have to get used to doing without.

I am.

Last edited by ValentineWiggin on 14 May 2012, 7:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Well, if you come off half as well IRL as you do online, his parents are probably right. We are our own worst critics, are we not? Anyway, congratulations Val! Best of luck.

Thankums.

I met my girlfriend on OKC

I think you do have to sell yourself quite well, or at least give your profile a bit of an edge if you can and also, changing bits of your profile regularly will make it more visible to potential mates.

Sounds like you're doing alright, Valentine go get 'em!

I am on okcupid now. I haven't had much success, and to be honest, a major issue is that most of the people on the website don't appeal to me either.

I tend to message people with the hope that they show some potential, but the knowledge that they probably will not. I get the feeling that the larger issue is that I am just an extremely nerdy and intelligent individual, but most people on that website don't really come close to having those inclinations. For the most part, I don't care about women not messaging me back because most of the time messaging them was a significant gamble on my part, so they probably just saved me some time.

To this point in time, I have met one friend, but nothing else through that website. I have not bothered with pay websites, as I don't think they'll fare much better. (Note: It could also be entirely true that I am simply not handling the situation well.)

I'm not having ANY luck...

Woo hoo! I FINALLY got up enough courage to send a message! I just simply asked a question relating to their profile, but that's it. I'm not holding out much hope for any reply, but it's definitely a step in the right direction.

That's not a terrible strategy anyway. It shows that you paid attention to their profile, and very few guys actually do that. Not only that, but most women don't put enough in their profile to allow you to be overly creative anyway.