"Friends with benefits" is nonsense.

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Seriously people need to stop being competitive when come to money and physical looks.

In fact, there's no chance that it'll happen: if you compete, you may lose; if you don't, you've lost already.

Even if you look at the most lame PUA sources, they define Alpha like I did. There's more of consensus on its definition than you think.

I haven't seen a man defining it as abusive and angry man.

Macho? Maybe, but again the cool cocky type of macho, not the aggressive type - or maybe only aggressive when it's necessary and rightful. Think of Thor in the marvel movies or the Aslan character in chronicles of Narnia.

Why?

Why is it reasonable to even think that people should go against human nature of competing for resources & attractive partners?

West civilization is against human nature. So yeah it can happen. Human nature would be killing and enslaving those who you can. That was human nature. But like many other human nature things we as society ended it and don’t allow it to be given into.
We also don’t have sex in public in front of people like is human nature.
Look at republicans they want human nature back, so they want to get rid of welfare as it’s unnatural to care for those who can’t survive. It’s human nature to let less fortunate people either die or be slaves. I’m sure many ceos would love slave labor again. They are already getting as close as they can within the law to it. Barely paying people anything so they use welfare then demanding welfare be abolished.

Society is itself a violation of human nature. It’s proof we can rise above human nature.

So no peopl don’t need to be competitive they can rise above it.

West civilization is against human nature. So yeah it can happen. Human nature would be killing and enslaving those who you can. That was human nature. But like many other human nature things we as society ended it and don’t allow it to be given into.
We also don’t have sex in public in front of people like is human nature.
Look at republicans they want human nature back, so they want to get rid of welfare as it’s unnatural to care for those who can’t survive. It’s human nature to let less fortunate people either die or be slaves. I’m sure many ceos would love slave labor again. They are already getting as close as they can within the law to it. Barely paying people anything so they use welfare then demanding welfare be abolished.

Society is itself a violation of human nature. It’s proof we can rise above human nature.

So no peopl don’t need to be competitive they can rise above it.

Many abusive men are alpha though. They successful, handsome. Think 50 shades of gray.

I find it hilarious the way men interpret that phenomenon! I can only imagine it is because either they do not have a female partner that was able to analyze herself enough to explain it to him, or else he has no female partner to try.

One thing to remind people who have never read the books- the female character lets herself be put into extremely vulnerable positions faced with Grey. Being tied up, being blindfolded, being dependent in various ways. It is scary and feels risky. In that position he could do anything- he could kill her if he so wanted! She sees a room that looks like a torture chamber, and it takes great courage to put herself in such vulnerable positions there.

But what happens? He doesn’t hurt her. He arouses her body with his own, or touching her with things that could hurt her, and then doesn’t. There is the tension and apprehension… which results only in a man not abusing that power. He shows her ways in which control can be pleasurable. He will use a vibrator until she is about to orgasm, then stop right before… waiting, then starting to use it again, showing her how pleasure can be longer with control. We read a whip “sliding over” her stomach or buttocks… it is sliding over, not hitting or injuring! He has ultimate control over his own aggressive and violent drives! He can be on the edge, totally able to inflict hurt, and controls himself.

THIS is the important point! A man with total self mastership and control over his base drives and impulsions is SOOOO sexy! It is a man who can be trusted, whose word can be relied on, who one can be totally open and vulnerable with, and know they will not abuse that power!

The books delve into his past, coming from a troubled childhood with a drug addict mother, becoming a teen with no self control, getting into trouble with violence and such…. until a dominatrix teaches him about self control.

Ana, at the beginning, is clumsy and unsure of herself. The story opens with her stepping in to do a favor for a friend (she can’t say no), actually tripping and falling into this guys office. She has no control over herself or her life.

By the last book, she is a confident and self mastered woman, able to fight and outrun “bad guys” with a grin- drive Grey’s fast car with skill….

Grey’s financial success is indicative of a man who has mastered himself.

I’m so sick of hearing boys complain that women just want men for their money! But a man who has no self control, has no self discipline, will never be rich. He will make impulsive and foolish choices, he will let his base appetites and drives sabotage his own choices and plans. No, not all rich men are self possessed, but the men that are, are rarely poor.

Any woman who wishes to be with a man she can trust, who has integrity and self control, who can handle power without falling into the trap of abusing it, would do well to look at their success in the outer world. Flying a helicopter, driving a fast car, running a corporation calls for self control and mastership.

That’s the draw of Grey. A man who you could open up to, lean on, and trust that he won’t use that moment to destroy or hurt you. That can channel his aggressive drives into constructive and beneficial actions.

Of course it is easy to simply say women want to be hurt and abused by men they can get money from. That is surely more comforting to tell yourself if you are a man who doesn’t have such self mastership and sees the prospect as too big to even try developing.

Alpha male =/= abuser.

Why?

Why is it reasonable to even think that people should go against human nature of competing for resources & attractive partners?

Oh, when an alpha male does it, it’s not called abuse; it’s called putting someone in their place.

Believe what you like, but being a confident, extroverted male who values physical prowess doesn't make one an abuser.

In nature, most of the violence happens at the beta level, not the alpha level.

Don't you know the difference between alpha and beta? You know what they means?

Here a useful link about it: http://tobealpha.com/alpha-vs-beta-males/

Alpha males are triggers to violence due to their competitive nature while beta males react to violence.

Alpha male =/= abuser.