How can I tell my girlfriend she is fat?

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The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Dec 2017, 3:20 pm

fluffysaurus wrote:

Typical, now I'm enjoying myself you want me to stop.

/System shutdown.

Let's start over, let's break down in two phases: First: your guy because half your height suddenly. Second: Having sex with him!

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Dec 2017, 3:23 pm

magz wrote:

Fireblossom wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Come on ladies...come on.

For once in WP history, give us a damn clear-cut answer to a question: Yes or No?

Stop avoiding...

So the question is: would you still find your partner attractive if he suddenly became half of your height? Did I understand correctly?

The only realistic situation of that happening would be him having his legs cut off. Well, at least this is the only hypothetical situation matching this description that I really can imagine myself in.
And in this case my answer is: probably yes. Althought if he just lost his legs, he would probably be depressed and I would need to help him get out of depression for the attractiveness to surface.

Women of WP, seriously.....please stop with this "This not realistic" bs just to avoid to give a clear-cut answer of Yes or No.

He just got much shorter than you by magic, Harry Potter's nasty spell, nothing is cut and no medical condition caused this. Is this fine?

magz
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07 Dec 2017, 3:39 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

magz wrote:

Fireblossom wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Come on ladies...come on.

For once in WP history, give us a damn clear-cut answer to a question: Yes or No?

Stop avoiding...

So the question is: would you still find your partner attractive if he suddenly became half of your height? Did I understand correctly?

Nope, it's not fine. I can deal with hypotetical situations only if I have any expirience of something at least vaguely similar. Toddlers are more than half my height, so I have no idea how to imagine a healthy adult man half my height.

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Hopelessly3
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07 Dec 2017, 3:41 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

magz wrote:

Fireblossom wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Come on ladies...come on.

For once in WP history, give us a damn clear-cut answer to a question: Yes or No?

Stop avoiding...

So the question is: would you still find your partner attractive if he suddenly became half of your height? Did I understand correctly?

Is there a reverse spell? Or is it permanent?

fluffysaurus
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07 Dec 2017, 3:53 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

fluffysaurus wrote:

Typical, now I'm enjoying myself you want me to stop.

/System shutdown.

Let's start over, let's break down in two phases: First: your guy because half your height suddenly. Second: Having sex with him!

I have no guy! I have no guy! I have no guy! I am ALWAYS single! I know, it's pathetic, but I have never been on a forth date.
If I found someone I could put up with and who would put up with me, and he suddenly became half my height, then I honestly don't think I would no longer find him attractive, but I do think it would take some getting used to.

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Closet Genious
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07 Dec 2017, 4:01 pm

This whole scenario about people becoming shorter and taller is honestly a bit hilarious boo...

Esme
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07 Dec 2017, 4:30 pm

I think the main issue is incompatible change (i.e. they looked like A when you met and you were happy with A, then changed to B afterwards and B includes some attribute that is a turn off for you personally). The criteria that come under 'incompatible change' will vary from person to person (weight, gender, height, hair colour, etc). Weight is one of these criteria for many people.

All I would suggest is that anyone entering into a relationship with someone new should be honest about what their areas of compromise are and what their incompatible criteria are. Then everyone knows where they stand in advance.

sly279
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07 Dec 2017, 4:41 pm

fluffysaurus wrote:

sly279 wrote:

fluffysaurus wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

goldfish21 wrote:

MidnightMoon wrote:

How about just accepting her the way she is?

Why do people say this as if sexual attraction should only matter the moment you meet someone?

Why should anyone accept their partner getting too fat, or too thin, or ____ that otherwise makes them sexually unattractive to them?

Seriously. I think it's ridiculous. He didn't meet a fat girl & was never attracted to a fat girl so why should he be with one?

Same goes for other changes in appearance or behaviour. If she was nice, and now she's not, why stay? If she was reasonable and responsible, but now spends money recklessly & is accumulating debt she'll never pay off, why stay?

If the things you were initially attracted to someone by are no longer present in that person or your relationship, it's time to have an adult conversation about getting back to where you both were Or parting ways and carrying on with your lives individually.

That’s why I asked earlier the ladies in the thread the fictive question what would happen if their partners suddenly became shorter than them (because I know most women would never consider a man shorter than them) / most dodged the question that this is impossible to happen (duh! no kidding ladies!).

Sorry didn't mean to dodge the question, I got distracted by the fact that I couldn't think of a way for that to happen that wouldn't involve them being dead, and dead isn't an attractive look on anyone.
Would I dump someone I loved if they got shorter (but didn't die) than me? no. would I mind them being a lot shorter? yes, but I wouldn't break up over it. Ideally a guy would be taller than me, but if you like someone you adjust your idea of what you find acceptable to fit them.

They could be in an accident have their legs cut off and feet reattached at their knees.
Would you find them attractive still? Would you resent them and that resentment gradually grow more and more. Would you want to be physically intimate with them?

What I seem to be getting is a lot of women will stick with a guy they no longer find attractive or want to be intimate with, why?

I don’t think people can adjust what they find attractive, if they could gay people could make themselves straight, this is proven to be impossible. People find attractive what they find attractive it’s unchangable. If you don’t find fat people attractive no amount of pep talk will make you find them attractive. Attraction is key to physically intamacy which is key to relationships for non asexuals.

It’s why I’m alone forever. Women can’t make themselves feel attracted to loser like me.

I used to work with a guy who, when he started I did not find attractive at all, he was obese and his face was quite boyish (he was also younger than me) by the time we had worked together for about 6 months I really fancied him. He was really nice, but the main thing was that we had the same sense of humour. By that point he had a girlfriend so I didn't say anything, and I don't think it would have worked anyway because of the age dif.

I didn't mean you can make yourself find someone attractive, I meant that if you like someone they become more attractive to you, and if you love someone they remain attractive despite something like loosing their legs. Yes physical attraction is important, for most people to feel towards their partner but it is not a simple straight forward thing, because people are complicated.

Most people won’t get to know a person they don’t find attractive to start with, so that supposed building attraction doesn’t have a chance to happen. I won’t date a woman I find ugly.

sly279
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07 Dec 2017, 4:43 pm

fluffysaurus wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

fluffysaurus wrote:

Typical, now I'm enjoying myself you want me to stop.

/System shutdown.

Let's start over, let's break down in two phases: First: your guy because half your height suddenly. Second: Having sex with him!

You’ve had a 3rd date

I’ve neber had a second date. You were practically in a relationship at date 3. Far closer then me. I’d probably date you but you likely would date me.

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Dec 2017, 6:05 pm

Hopelessly3 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

magz wrote:

Fireblossom wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Come on ladies...come on.

For once in WP history, give us a damn clear-cut answer to a question: Yes or No?

Stop avoiding...

So the question is: would you still find your partner attractive if he suddenly became half of your height? Did I understand correctly?

Is there a reverse spell? Or is it permanent?

No, I killed Harry Potter - so there’s no way to get his height back!

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Dec 2017, 6:09 pm

Closet Genious wrote:

This whole scenario about people becoming shorter and taller is honestly a bit hilarious boo...

What’s more hilarious is the pretense of missing the point - and the avoidance of giving a clear cut answer by pointing out how this can be possible in real life.

As if they are completely unable to imagine fictive scenarios - I thought aspies are supposed to be creative who create things like pokemon.

Oh well....but I am sure they’re starting to understand the OP’s point of view.

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Dec 2017, 6:12 pm

fluffysaurus wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

fluffysaurus wrote:

Typical, now I'm enjoying myself you want me to stop.

/System shutdown.

Let's start over, let's break down in two phases: First: your guy because half your height suddenly. Second: Having sex with him!

Imagine a guy! Imagine a guy! Imagine a guy!

A crush of yours or maybe your favorite pornstar.

Closet Genious
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07 Dec 2017, 6:13 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Closet Genious wrote:

This whole scenario about people becoming shorter and taller is honestly a bit hilarious boo...

No I agree with you, but the scenario makes me laugh when I visualize it.
So I thought maybe the question you're setting up for the females here, is a tough one.

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Dec 2017, 6:18 pm

Closet Genious wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Closet Genious wrote:

This whole scenario about people becoming shorter and taller is honestly a bit hilarious boo...

No I agree with you, but the scenario makes me laugh when I visualize it.
So I thought maybe the question you're setting up for the females here, is a tough one.

Well, it is a fact that shortness is a common turn off for many women like how fatness is a turn off for many men (yet there are way more men who are into BBWs than women who are into short men).

So the story is equivalent to the OP case really - his gf became fat in a short period.

goldfish21
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07 Dec 2017, 6:25 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Well, yes.. in general you're correct that women seem more drawn to tall males than short, but that doesn't mean there aren't any specifically attracted to short men. It's just they're not the majority. But like any marketing/sales, you're not selling yourself to the majority, only to those in your target market that are interested in you.. and 100% of girls interested in shorter guys MAY be interested in you. That's a way better figure to focus on vs. "it seems only 3% of the general population of women are interested in short guys." It's all just a matter of perspective & mindset. Basically, even when overcoming challenges, focus on the positive bits however you can as it'll put you in the frame of mind to put out a positive "vibe" and potentially attract someone vs. dwelling on allll the possible negatives.

Just for the record, while I realize it's of nearly zero value to you lol, I'm only into gys shorter than me - never taller. I know other gay guys like this, too. Sure, there are bound to be many gay guys only into taller guys, but for myself and at least one of my friends - it's only shorter, as one criteria we each have. My point with that is that there are DEFINITELY women out there like this, too, as there's virtually every sort of person and what they're attracted to out there.

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Closet Genious
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07 Dec 2017, 6:37 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Closet Genious wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Closet Genious wrote:

This whole scenario about people becoming shorter and taller is honestly a bit hilarious boo...

No I agree with you, but the scenario makes me laugh when I visualize it.
So I thought maybe the question you're setting up for the females here, is a tough one.

Well, it is a fact that shortness is a common turn off for many women like how fatness is a turn off for many me (yet there are way more men who are into BBWs).

So the story is equivalent to the OP case really - his gf became fat in a short period.

For sure, and I think we both now the answer to question.
The dating landscape is without a doubt, very unforgiving if you're a short man. Even if you're just below average it's already a disadvantage. It doesn't help that height is impossible to change.

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