The only women my age I would be interested in

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ironpony
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11 Jan 2022, 2:24 am

Well I just don't understand the big deal of this thread. Going after women in their 20s, if that's what you want, should not feel this risky, such as feeling like you are going to be caught with a minor, etc. Why such fear?



QFT
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11 Jan 2022, 3:20 am

ironpony wrote:
Well I just don't understand the big deal of this thread. Going after women in their 20s, if that's what you want, should not feel this risky, such as feeling like you are going to be caught with a minor, etc. Why such fear?


Because I went off tangent.

As far as going after women in their 20-s, there is no fear of anything legal. Just the fear of rejection. But thats a different topic: nobody gets arrested for rejection.

As far as fear of breaking a law, that was referrign to one *specific* woman who was 18 and in high school. That woman is irrelevant. If you follow the thread, you will see she was banned, so I can't talk to her even if I wanted to. But this subject came up *before* she was banned.

The reason I continue to pursue this tangent is because I found the topic interesting. So I talk about it out of curiosity even though it is no longer relevant.

But yes I am still interested in the original topic of this thread. And the original topic of this thread isn't related to the fear of breaking the law. Just the fear of rejection.

Fear of rejection and fear of breaking the law are two completely different topics that are not related to each other. The fear of rejection is the original topic. Fear of breaking the law is a tangent that is not relevant. But I like discussing both just cause I am curious about said tangent. But I do intend to discuss the original topic too since the original topic is what is actually important to my life, as opposed to mere curiosity.

The reason fear of rejection affects me a lot more than fear of breaking the law is because the proportion of 18 year olds who would even reply to me is tiny. So if I want to avoid the fear of breaking the law, I just have to cut off 1% of women. Well, 1% is tiny. So why not go ahead and cut it off if it makes me sleep better. Its not such a big sacrifice. Particularly since I don't have that much in common with 18 year olds anyway.

As far as fear of rejection, that is 99% of women. So that is far bigger sacrifice. But like both of us said, the law is not relevant here. Because here we are talking about women in their 20-s, not 18, and none of them are in high school anyway.

The reason I keep talking about the law-related topic, despite it being a lot less relevant, is because I am a curious person. So if I see something I don't understand I want to understand it.

But yes, the topic of women in the 20-s is a lot more important one. But I still want to talk about both topics: as long as one topic doesn't disract people from the other one.



kraftiekortie
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11 Jan 2022, 7:54 am

Women in their 40s tend to be much better in bed than women in their 20s— and are very charming and feminine people :heart:



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11 Jan 2022, 8:07 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Women in their 40s tend to be much better in bed than women in their 20s— and are very charming and feminine people :heart:


Since I never had sex, I don't even care how they are in bed. Its the act of interaction with 20-somethings that counts a lot more than with 40-somethings, in any capacity.

Its ridiculous how people see sex in everything. I remember, back in 2013, I was bragging on facebook about being with the virgin at the time and one other women who was pissed at me accused me of wanting a virgin "only because her vagina is more tight" (to tell me that I am supposedly shallow). I was like "huh, I don't even know how tight anybody's vagina is, nor do I care".



kraftiekortie
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11 Jan 2022, 8:32 am

I just feel you would be limiting yourself if you confined your desires to women in their 20s.

There’s so many different sorts of attractiveness and cuteness.



QFT
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11 Jan 2022, 8:37 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I just feel you would be limiting yourself if you confined your desires to women in their 20s.

There’s so many different sorts of attractiveness and cuteness.


I am not limitting myself to 20-s, I am just "preferring" 20-s. But I am open to 30-s too. In fact on dating sites I tend to contact women in their 30-s more often, simply because I am more likely to get replies that way.

However, I don't contact women in their 40-s. Even though I said I never had sex, I want children in the future. And they are likely to become infertile for one thing. But even if I set this aside, I miss my younger years so why go for someone even older (especially seing that I am in my early 40-s as is).



ironpony
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11 Jan 2022, 9:38 am

QFT wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Well I just don't understand the big deal of this thread. Going after women in their 20s, if that's what you want, should not feel this risky, such as feeling like you are going to be caught with a minor, etc. Why such fear?


Because I went off tangent.

As far as going after women in their 20-s, there is no fear of anything legal. Just the fear of rejection. But thats a different topic: nobody gets arrested for rejection.

As far as fear of breaking a law, that was referrign to one *specific* woman who was 18 and in high school. That woman is irrelevant. If you follow the thread, you will see she was banned, so I can't talk to her even if I wanted to. But this subject came up *before* she was banned.

The reason I continue to pursue this tangent is because I found the topic interesting. So I talk about it out of curiosity even though it is no longer relevant.

But yes I am still interested in the original topic of this thread. And the original topic of this thread isn't related to the fear of breaking the law. Just the fear of rejection.

Fear of rejection and fear of breaking the law are two completely different topics that are not related to each other. The fear of rejection is the original topic. Fear of breaking the law is a tangent that is not relevant. But I like discussing both just cause I am curious about said tangent. But I do intend to discuss the original topic too since the original topic is what is actually important to my life, as opposed to mere curiosity.

The reason fear of rejection affects me a lot more than fear of breaking the law is because the proportion of 18 year olds who would even reply to me is tiny. So if I want to avoid the fear of breaking the law, I just have to cut off 1% of women. Well, 1% is tiny. So why not go ahead and cut it off if it makes me sleep better. Its not such a big sacrifice. Particularly since I don't have that much in common with 18 year olds anyway.

As far as fear of rejection, that is 99% of women. So that is far bigger sacrifice. But like both of us said, the law is not relevant here. Because here we are talking about women in their 20-s, not 18, and none of them are in high school anyway.

The reason I keep talking about the law-related topic, despite it being a lot less relevant, is because I am a curious person. So if I see something I don't understand I want to understand it.

But yes, the topic of women in the 20-s is a lot more important one. But I still want to talk about both topics: as long as one topic doesn't disract people from the other one.


Oh okay, I see. I am sorry about the rejection issues you are facing.



ironpony
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11 Jan 2022, 9:39 am

QFT wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
Women in their 40s tend to be much better in bed than women in their 20s— and are very charming and feminine people :heart:


Since I never had sex, I don't even care how they are in bed. Its the act of interaction with 20-somethings that counts a lot more than with 40-somethings, in any capacity.

Its ridiculous how people see sex in everything. I remember, back in 2013, I was bragging on facebook about being with the virgin at the time and one other women who was pissed at me accused me of wanting a virgin "only because her vagina is more tight" (to tell me that I am supposedly shallow). I was like "huh, I don't even know how tight anybody's vagina is, nor do I care".


Well virgin women are hard to get it seems, so if you were able to get one, than you must have some game?



QFT
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11 Jan 2022, 10:29 am

ironpony wrote:
QFT wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
Women in their 40s tend to be much better in bed than women in their 20s— and are very charming and feminine people :heart:


Since I never had sex, I don't even care how they are in bed. Its the act of interaction with 20-somethings that counts a lot more than with 40-somethings, in any capacity.

Its ridiculous how people see sex in everything. I remember, back in 2013, I was bragging on facebook about being with the virgin at the time and one other women who was pissed at me accused me of wanting a virgin "only because her vagina is more tight" (to tell me that I am supposedly shallow). I was like "huh, I don't even know how tight anybody's vagina is, nor do I care".


Well virgin women are hard to get it seems, so if you were able to get one, than you must have some game?


She was raised in very conservative southrn baptist family, she lived with her parents despite being in the early 30-s, she didn't have any friends other than her sister, she didn't see any problem with the fact that I don't have friends, she was freaking out when I was invited to the party, and got jealous when I mentioned possibly meeting my mom's landlords granddaughter whom I only meet once in few years.

So she is a different story from everyone else.



rse92
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11 Jan 2022, 3:47 pm

KimD wrote:
rse92 wrote:
QFT wrote:
KimD wrote:

Actually it is not as obvious as you think. My mom was regularly paying my credit card way into my adulthood (including when I was in my 30-s). At some point when the debt was unusually high she kept insisting I show her the transaction history. I refused, no matter how many times she insisted I do. And there was really nothing she could do about it because its my private history. If she wants to pay my card (which she continued to do regardless) thats her decision, but that doesn't change the fact that banks aren't allowed to disclose to her my transaction history.


That's really lame and selfish, and manipulative.


This comment is misleading; it appears as if I said that my mom was paying my credit card, and so on. Those are QFT's words about their own experiences--NOT MINE!! I never said such things, I never did such things, and I never would.


I apologize to you. I misedited the quote. I didn't mean to attribute his selfish asininity to you.



rse92
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11 Jan 2022, 3:50 pm

QFT wrote:
KimD wrote:
I never did such things, and I never would.


It wasn't my "doing" either since I never *asked* my mom to pay my credit card, she *decided* to do that all on her own.

I guess the part that *is* my doing is that

a) I kept spending too much money

b) I didn't stop my mom from paying the card

By the way she no longer does it. After living with her for a year during covid while at the same time still getting TA salary, that was more than enough to pay off my own credit card.

Now the other thing I have to pay off is student loan. And this I am paying on my own. Not because of any concern for my mom but rather because I don't want her to know I have this loan to begin with -- she would kill me if she finds out.


c) Not giving your mother the billing statements or letting her know what you were spending on even as your spending got higher and higher.

I suspect you neglected to mention c) because even you know that comes off as really horrible.



rse92
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11 Jan 2022, 3:55 pm

QFT wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
I just feel you would be limiting yourself if you confined your desires to women in their 20s.

There’s so many different sorts of attractiveness and cuteness.


I am not limitting myself to 20-s, I am just "preferring" 20-s. But I am open to 30-s too. In fact on dating sites I tend to contact women in their 30-s more often, simply because I am more likely to get replies that way.

However, I don't contact women in their 40-s. Even though I said I never had sex, I want children in the future. And they are likely to become infertile for one thing. But even if I set this aside, I miss my younger years so why go for someone even older (especially seing that I am in my early 40-s as is).


Let's be frank. You are a 42 years old college TA. The pool of 20 something women who would be interested in you is very small and the pool of high quality 20 something women who would be interested in you is even smaller.

You might be able to find yourself a woman your own age. That would be better use of your energy than indulging in fantasy here.



QFT
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11 Jan 2022, 5:07 pm

rse92 wrote:
QFT wrote:
KimD wrote:
I never did such things, and I never would.


It wasn't my "doing" either since I never *asked* my mom to pay my credit card, she *decided* to do that all on her own.

I guess the part that *is* my doing is that

a) I kept spending too much money

b) I didn't stop my mom from paying the card

By the way she no longer does it. After living with her for a year during covid while at the same time still getting TA salary, that was more than enough to pay off my own credit card.

Now the other thing I have to pay off is student loan. And this I am paying on my own. Not because of any concern for my mom but rather because I don't want her to know I have this loan to begin with -- she would kill me if she finds out.


c) Not giving your mother the billing statements or letting her know what you were spending on even as your spending got higher and higher.

I suspect you neglected to mention c) because even you know that comes off as really horrible.


I thought "c" logically follows from things I said. In particular, I said that I spent too much money, I also said I didn't give my mom the billing statement, these two things together imply "c". Just because I didn't say "c" in your exact words but instead said it in different words doesn't mean I was hiding it.

Point remains: if my mom didn't offer to pay it off, I wouldn't have asked her. Just like I am not asking her to pay off my student loan.



QFT
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11 Jan 2022, 5:29 pm

rse92 wrote:
QFT wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
I just feel you would be limiting yourself if you confined your desires to women in their 20s.

There’s so many different sorts of attractiveness and cuteness.


I am not limitting myself to 20-s, I am just "preferring" 20-s. But I am open to 30-s too. In fact on dating sites I tend to contact women in their 30-s more often, simply because I am more likely to get replies that way.

However, I don't contact women in their 40-s. Even though I said I never had sex, I want children in the future. And they are likely to become infertile for one thing. But even if I set this aside, I miss my younger years so why go for someone even older (especially seing that I am in my early 40-s as is).


Let's be frank. You are a 42 years old college TA. The pool of 20 something women who would be interested in you is very small and the pool of high quality 20 something women who would be interested in you is even smaller.

You might be able to find yourself a woman your own age. That would be better use of your energy than indulging in fantasy here.


Well, if you go back to the title of this post, there *are* women my age whom I am willing to date: namely, the ones whom I knew when I was younger. Thus I can think of them as "20-somethings who became 40-something" as opposed to simply "40 something".

The only question is where can I find them. Believe it or not, I ran into one of them. But she is married. So I need to be lucky again and run into someone who is still single.



rse92
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11 Jan 2022, 5:31 pm

It really doesn't logically follow. No wonder you are still a TA.



QFT
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11 Jan 2022, 5:43 pm

rse92 wrote:
It really doesn't logically follow.


Okay, lets look at the exact words you wrote in "c" and show you my words:

YOUR WORDS: Not giving your mother the billing statements or letting her know what you were spending on

MY WORDS: she kept insisting I show her the transaction history. I refused, no matter how many times she insisted I do.

YOUR WORDS: even as your spending got higher and higher.

MY WORDS: At some point when the debt was unusually high

So yes, I said the same things you did, just in different words.

rse92 wrote:
No wonder you are still a TA.


I got my first ph.d. when I was 29 and did 3 postdocs afterwords. It was my own decision to go to a new graduate school and do the second ph.d. (the first one was in physics the second is in math).

The reason I did that is that I really want to become a professor but I don't have enough publications to stand the competition. Most people in my situations either go to industry or go teach in community college. But I don't want to do that. I still want to be theoretical physicist. Thats why I decided to go back to graduate school as I am continuing to try and publish. Nobody told me to do that, in fact most people were surprised I decided to go that rout. It was just a creative move on my part.