My problem with relationships and age

Post Reply New Topic

Oh okay but I mean can you yourself go out and try it with women, and I don't mean just research? For example, I don't mean to come off like I am bragging when I say this, because I am not, but my gf is 21 and I'm 37, because I too feel I am at that younger age mentally, because I am autistic. But I am just using my self as an example, as to how I may be relate-able to you, and that maybe you can try the same thing perhaps?

Um... Yeah there's no reason to not experiment, but it's best not to enable delusions.

Always look at yourself through your potential date's eyes. Why date you? What do you have to offer?

Think of it as being a solution looking for a problem, or an answer looking for a question. Does one really fit the other? Based on this keep your expectations realistic.

Can't say that I'm not mildly curious about how it will go with an 18-year old.

Not too sound too harsh against the OP, but I do understand why he just doesn't try going after younger women if they are more suitable for him. They may be more suited for him but at the same time, he is too ashamed to do it. Not to come off harsh, but I just wanted to give him a push in the hopefully right direction.

There's currently a thread running with people sharing their brutal rejections. That thread just might have a few more additions...

Oh okay, I don't know about that thread I don't think, but what does that thread have to do with this?

There are different ways to look at OP's problem. The most objective way would be to recognize the OP is out of time to be chasing things that aren't realistic.

On the other hand it could also be argued that OP already missed the prime, so there is no hurry anymore... To an extent.

Why is it unrealistic totally though?

Oh I see. Well I was using my relationship as an example before. I am 37 and my gf is 21. And the OP said he feels he would connect a lot better maturity wise with a woman around this age. And I found that relate-able because I feel I am around her range of maturity advancement. So I thought if it could happen for me, perhaps it can happen for the OP too?

Also, a friend of mine before told me felt that me dating a 21 year is easier for me perhaps, because a woman that age, likely does not have as high of expectations, as older women and would therefore be easier going, which is why it's been easier with for her, he says.

If he is correct, than perhaps the OP might have an easier time with younger women that age, if they are easier, like my friend said?

OP's problem is that he's too focused on marriage or serious commitments.

At age 40, yes it's very late to go for that.

Go for fun relationships, FWBs, and you wouldn't have the age gap problem nor imbalanced power dynamics (as long they're well adults above 21 or something).

A lot of sensible advice for the OP