Didn’t come as a surprise that he was a virgin!

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Psychotherapy is a fraud, silly! It's been a fraud since day one. If you think sitting there and answering stupid questions, like "How did that make you feel?", helps, then I got bridges in New York and San Francisco to sell you.

Probably because we asked a question about rape that wasn't fully answered.

I wanted to know why autistic girls and women get raped if they have such bad looks and genes, because of nature.

You said that genetic looks don't affect a person's character or personality.

Twilight asked how that explains male rapists. Some of them are quite handsome.

Being vulnerable overrides all looks from a rapists perspective.

It was an attempt at demonstrating the absurdity of basing behavior (and making absurd assumptions) off of supposed genetics.

Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 09 Jul 2022, 5:59 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Ah, I forgot. My opinion about therapy, which saved my life after violent sexual abuse, is wrong.

Same with all the time I've spent reading your threads about trauma from therapy, and offering advice.

Likewise with the time I wasted making threads about Men's Mental Health, and Men's PTSD.

I forgot to check my lived experience.

Therapy has helped many individuals, including myself, but we must all be wrong.

Saying 'how did that make you feel?' is not psychotherapy.

I just saw this.
I agree with you.
I was thinking of starting a thread called "How to have a conversation".
I was worried it would seem condescending, but that wasn't my intent.

I thought I might post some etiquette rules or tips about how to have conversations.
Then people could go on the thread and practise having respectful and meaningful conversation.
It wouldn't have to be about sex or gender or politics, but any topic, so long as it was reciprocal.

It's not like I know all the answers, but it's very hard to discuss anything on this site.
I thought it might be helpful.

If it's not psychotherapy, then why does every psychotherapist ask it? Not only that, they get ANGRY if you say you don't know. Which puts the burden of proof on YOU, even though YOU'RE paying $100+ an hour.

Every psychotherapist doesn't ask that, and many people have told you this before.
Many people have also commented about "Alexithymia" or not knowing how to express our feelings.
That's normal for autistic people.
Another consideration is that we often have issues with interoception (reading our body sensations / emotions).

I've written lots of posts about going to an Occupational Therapist for help with this.
I think others have too.

Beyond that I acknowledge that you experienced trauma from your therapy.
I've tried to support you and other men who have PTSD.
Have you read any of that?

Some people don't like therapy for whatever reason and that's a valid opinion.
It's just frustrating when you don't respect the opinion of others who had success.

I’d have to agree with Isabella and Twilight on all this.

I feel like the life philosophy of an Incel reeks of weakness and simplicity, and of not studying with thoroughness the lives of men and women.

Men have their problems in dating…..and so do women. All genders are victims in many ways. But there is delight in romance….and sometimes even dating.

It’s a “give up” philosophy, and gets nobody associated with this anywhere. It imprisons people in junk ideas.

It’s a pity a person of intelligence can’t USE that intelligence.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 09 Jul 2022, 7:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.

[quote="kraftiekortie”] Men have their problems in dating…..and so do women. [/quote]

Some of our problems are the same or very similar.

The ironic thing is that I do empathise with men (and women) who are involuntarily celibate and have difficulty meeting people or maintaining relationships especially when they're autistic. I've read enough heartfelt posts from members explaining how lonely they are, and how times have changed since when you and I were young.

I get all that and I have compassion for that. I've written about it and responded to many posts to let members know their voices are being heard.

My problem is when some of us go out of our way to be friendly and helpful to these members, and get nothing in return from some of them. They don't say thank you and they certainly don't help us when we share stories of trauma or pain. No matter what we write, some people judge us as hateful, judgmental, crazy or "wrong" for explaining our own point of view while also being female. Somehow all of their problems are our fault. Even worse, it's upsetting to put forth all this emotional labour and be completely ignored without any acknowledgement for the support and friendship we've tried to offer.

I'm still waiting on a response from Aspie1 about the abuse links, and an answer about the difference between "nice guys" and "bad boys". It's hard to progress in a conversation when people invalidate the other person, or pretend to be part of a dialogue when they're not.

I don't agree with you.
You may have had a previous bad experience or two but that doesn't mean all therapists are the same.
It also depends on the kind of therapy you are having.
Usually a therapist will negotiate and collaborate with their client.
To become angry with a client is unprofessional and unethical.

Oh I see. But does this mean that a lot of women care about looks more than autism or mental/social function?

I was called all sorts of names as a child. I saw therapists, too. I felt very lonely, and thought nothing of going into a store and shoplifting something. People were in absolute shock that I had a girlfriend in my senior year of high school, despite being the Pariah of Pariahs.

We have to grow up from that high school mentality…..and most people do grow up from that mentality. This is what the Alpha/Beta thing is…..the same thing as the “jocks” and “nerds” in high school.

Around 50% of men date about 50% of women. “Evolutionary biology” has little to do with actual human love and desirability. Genetics has little to do with the ultimate choice of a mate.

Under a theory of “evolutionary biology,” I would have been considered a “mutation,” a “genetic defective.” I’m glad all this stuff is not true.