Most Aspie men are in over their heads with dating.

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@fs, leaving aside all the controversy of your opinions, my take-away from your "call to action" is this: if you don't have relationship success in your current environment, change your environment.

Most people would advise the following: if you don't have relationship success in your current environment, take a look at your situation. Try to figure out if it's your environment that's the problem, or if it's you. If it's you - get to work on addressing the issues that are causing you to fail. If it's your environment, change your environment.

However, you advocate for simply changing your environment. It seems to me that your "logic" is that in developed nations, "feminism" has given women too many options - meaning that they don't have to settle for lesser men (women in developed countries do tend to have the option to be alone rather than to settle). Again, following your "logic," your proposed solution is that (I'm assuming Aspie men? or is it any man?) should simply target a culture where women have fewer options, and would be willing to settle for a lesser man - hence your focus on third world countries as a source of "suitable" women.

Okay.....why not? Maybe you'd get more acceptance if you re-branded your idea into a "citizenship with benefits" program. Honestly, living in the States, even with a man who honestly feels the need to control and subjugate her would probably seem like a dream come true for many, many women in third-world countries. Let's face it, there's a terrible chance she could be subjugated by men for the rest of her life if she remained in her own country. At least with your solution, she'd have her green card in a few years, get a divorce, and make a decent life for herself in a country which sees women as being worthy of the same rights as men. Added bonus: men who feel the need to control and subjugate women would not be wasting the time of women who do have options for healthy, satisfying, loving partnerships.

Your plan doesn't really address even the possibility that the reason a man is unsuccessful in relationships is that he's the problem. Unfortunately, that's a pretty big gap, because if a man doesn't acknowledge and address his own problems, he's really not going to be happy in the long run (probably will marry and be divorced from many third-world women over the course of a lifetime). But everything can't be perfect, I guess. At least the end result will be a more diverse society (good), with more women who are free of the control and subjugation of weak, ineffective, impotent men....and some modicum of satisfaction for the men who enter into these marriages. Your solution would actually wind up empowering the very women you seek to control and subjugate - so please, have at it.

Obviously you've stirred a huge amount of controversy in the way you've expressed your opinion - exacerbated by the fact that you seem incapable of acknowledging that your problem with women could actually be your problem with women. Unfortunately, you have violated the rules of this site by making "negative generalizations about whole groups of people" - to quote you (just once, as there are many examples in this thread): "American women suck and I strongly advise all men to avoid them like the plague." I'm thinking that close to 200 million women constitute a group, so you're no victim here.

IMO it is the atmosphere he is creating that is the problem, and censoring his statements will not do much if he continues on about his views

he is on a recruitment mission

I didn't create this thread for it to be hijacked by some cult leader.

While I agree with his basic premise...that young American women have a sense of entitlement...he obviously is on a mission, and I'm not about that at all.

I just think *most* not all Aspie men are in over their heads with dating (at least as it concerns 20something dating) because sincerity isn't welcome. Aspies are "what you see if what you get" people...and dating is a web of games and power-play.

I do want to say something sort of off the wall here.

Feminism is supposed to be about giving women choices. One of those choices is to take on traditional roles and be submissive to men. There are many American women making that choice, and it is just as valid as any other choice. The point was to choose, not to remove any single option.

Being free from cookie-cutter stereotypes may make finding a mate more difficult, but it should enable one, long run, to find a more appropriate mate. At least now men know, if they are in a relationship with an American woman choosing traditional roles, that she is happy with those roles, and won't disappear from the marriage a few years down the road because she "can't handle it" (something that did, in fact, happen in the 1950's when rigid roles were the norm).

Feminism should also give men choices, to be free of pre-designated roles, should they so choose. Some men like that, some don't, and the choices are not yet as real as they ideally would be; it is still tough for women to accept a man that is less intelligent and has less income potential than they do (the problem here not being that women are free to be intelligent and earn income, but that they haven't completely let go of the idea that their men should be at least equal to them in personal acheivement, and the men haven't let go of their need to take the higher position).

Feminism isn't the problem. There is an actual problem brewing, and as the mother of a son I am aware of it, and it starts in education. Boys are currently at a disadvantage in the education system, which puts them at a disadvantage when they eventually enter the job market. I don't have time to go into the details, but there is an excellent book on the subject, written by a woman, which I have asked some of my son's teachers to read. We are reaching a point where 60% of college students are women, and only 40% are men. That does not bode well for the future of men, and it does not bode well for their future marriage potential. Anyone raising either a son or a daughter would be right to be concerend about the lack of balance there. Who are all those well educated women going to marry? If it could be proven that women at all ages and in all measures were superior to men, then maybe we could say "let's just flip roles." But we can't say that. There are differences, especially in developmental timing, but nothing that doesn't really even out in the end. The inblanace reflects a problem in how we choose to educate, and that problem needs to be fixed.

All of which leaves me wondering just a little ... could someone like fs have started from a small observation that had some merit, found the wrong scapegoat, and let it grow into what I do think is a highly flawed and damaging belief system?

Should look it now. I'm not guilt-free in this...I took some shots and made some accusations (concerning other things) but it obviously got hi-jacked by that one person. I will make a new thread, and more coherently and maturely get my points across.