How do females respond to 'broken' males?

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I have tried all antidepressant, antipsychotic and mood stabiliser medication, self help, self hypnosis, psychologists, psychiatrists, career advisors. I just want to wake up tomorrow without any Aspergers or depression or if not I don't want to wake up

Unfortunately you are not going to wake up the next morning with no AS or depression. It will always be with you. You just have to learn how to manage it like we all do. Hang in there man. Take it easy. I know it is frustrating beyond words. Just gotta learn to relax and not expect things to happen over night. I had to. Try and focus on things that make you feel good. I never said medications, shrinks, etc were the answer just a thought. For me they had their good points to start with although in the end I found that psychs were more trouble than their worth. I have thought about attending asperger's workshops. Maybe that's an idea for you. I don't know. I have never been. But I will be sure to check them out.

It fills me with such contempt and loathing to hear about women disrespecting 'wimpy' men. I'm just trying to stay in touch and be nice to you...

"Broken" is too vauge a term to really answer. I'm a guy myself, and from what I observe and hear from my female friends, is that women are not attracted to weak or timid men. Women can be great healers, but only if the guy has other things going for him (ie: Hot, Strong, Rich, Exciting).

I don't care if this makes me sexist, but women like strong men becuase men are the stronger sex. And men like weak women becuase women are the weaker sex. Aspie men have troubles becuase current society sees the manifestations of our diagnosis as "Weaknesses" and women get turned off. Radiate stregth and you'll attract women, no matter what you're emotional state.


</Puts on flame suit>

How do I manage it. I read a book Feeling Better a Guide To Mood Management, and it said the same thing, Schedule pleasant activities, then I buy what I can, car, big TV, etc. But it doesn't change anything I would rather sit and stare that play PS3 or anything. How to focus on what makes me feel good. There is no any more. A lot of times I manage to put on a very good façade, but I am terrible inside. People think I am good looking when they meet me and I am able to keep the impression I am "stronger sex" for about 60 seconds then they realise I am different. Then I want do die. I don't know how to "radiate strength" it's impossible. There is group therapy for Aspergers a clinic I know but it is about 80km away and I have to work on that day. Maybe I will wag work. I don't need the money. Anyway I know you guys can't help me any further. Thank for your sympathy.

Hearing about these supposed attitudes of women has been giving me these violent feelings... I just want to be a nice guy...

Its like I said earlier, be sure to self-improve as much as you can all the while making sure that you have your frailties realistically accounted for. Its really the only way to go.

Assertive dominant males to some women are the sort of men that have the type of ingrained chauvism they do not even recognise, are patronising, argumentative and make you feel opressed...

In that case I'd rather pick "broken" (if I was doing any kind of picking..given my level of inertia on this it's not likely )

However AS is itself does not make some one "broken" IMO. The ancilliary issues many of us have or have had, drink, drugs, messed up education, careers, relationships, issues with family etc are commonalities not drawbacks. If I find myself in a different mindset re relationships, I would be more comfortable with someone who has been through similar things to me. I wouldn't say I'm broken though, I just have some sharp edges

Daemonic-Jackal, as a woman I can tell you, I would much prefer not to get sympathy from the media but have most of the power and control in society like men do.

Women still have it a LOT worse than men. Wages are lower for us on average, even with equivalent jobs, there are few women in positions of power, women (but not men) are still expected to choose between babies on their career, there are more incidents of violence and sexual assult against women and so on. And this is just the West. Outside of the west there are places where women have their genitals mutilated as little children, where they can be stoned for being raped, where they are not allowed to go to school, not allowed to vote, not allowed to drive, not allowed to go out of the house without a male accompanying them, they have to marry young against their will to men who are allowed to beat and rape them.

So, Docmartin, I agree, we live in a sexist society but it is not men I am concerned about.

I will go with some of the others, and say that with "broken males", most women either use, and walk all over them, or they brush them off to the side, in favor of the more confident, attractive, exciting, and dominant types. Is this wrong, yes, but that's the way it is.

Also, I've noticed a lot of women (on here and in real life) have the "it's my way or the highway" attitude. In that, they have plenty of issues of their own, and can be real PITA's themselves, but they expect the guy to go along with it, now if the guy has any issues, they either try to "change" him into their ideal man, or they get rid of him, because they know another guy will be waiting around the corner for them.

Well I don't think that it is right to use anybody (but males are just as guilty of this as women).. but what is wrong with brushing over less attractive, less confident and less exciting types? I would prefer a confident, attractive and exciting partner and I can't see why this is wrong.



I have noticed a lot of men like this too. I doubt it is gender specific.

I would imagine that the response would depend upon the woman.

My guess is that the overwhelming majority of women find it a turn off, or so many of the 'broken' men wouldn't be single. But that could change if whether or not a man is considered 'broken' partially because he is single.

Sounds kinky. Maybe I should put on a 'broken' act.

I didn't mean to say that women have it easier than men at all. It's hard for both sexes. Don't get me wrong. What I meant was that society is sexist where men are expected to be the strong, macho and dominant types and women are expected to be the more fragile ones.

Well I am sorry I could not be of further help to you but remember what you appear to be going through, most of us are experiencing very similar situations. You are not suffering alone even though it feels like it.

Sometimes I wonder would it be better to come across as heartless, cold and arrogant than wimpy and broken? Just like the 'real' Doc Martin. Personally I would rather be seen as a 'prick' than a wimp. Sorry for the course language.

Yeah, I agree that men are guilty as well. We live in a self-centered, shallow, and superficial world, where people are hypocrites, and have many double-standards. The problem with going for the more attractive, confident, or whatever types, is that there are many people that want these things is a partner, but can't they can't offer the same things themselves (eg. double-standards).

What really bugs me, is that there are many woman on here that talk about all of the problems they have, yet in the same sentence, they are telling everyone that they want a confident, attractive, interesting, caring, supportive, or whatever else kind of guy...this is completely self-centered and shallow.

Examples:
They want an attractive partner, yet they aren't that great looking.
They want someone that has their sh*t together, but they are a mess themselves.

Last edited by SilverStar on 05 Jun 2009, 8:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.