Is it normal to want affection more than sex?

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MDD123
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18 Jul 2009, 6:45 am

billsmithglendale wrote:
I think that's a pretty good equation -- someone who scores high on both would be a good match.

You only live one life -- Is what you want so outrageous that you can't go for it and be happy? (I'm assuming what you want is legal)


I actually like the older crowd (ok I guess that isn't weird), younger people need so much reassurance that I just get worn out.



Michjo
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18 Jul 2009, 6:55 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
If it's that much more common in women, why is it so hard for me to find a woman that wants affection?

It's not more common in women, it's just made out to be that way because women tend to be more specific about who they will sleep with than men. You've got two choices, you can wait around until you meet a girl who is like you that you like. Or you can change your expectations, get drunk all the time, goto nightclubs, and go home with strangers. Personally, i'm quite happy waiting for someone, i'm not looking for sex.



LePetitPrince
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18 Jul 2009, 10:31 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
Manders wrote:
I too want affection more than sex. Though it seems to be more common in females...


If it's that much more common in women, why is it so hard for me to find a woman that wants affection?




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Normalcy is derived from the word 'norm', the norm is defined by the majority. Here the definition of 'norm': a standard or model or pattern regarded as typical.

If 99% of guys consider their sexual urges as first priority then this is the typical male behavior so this its norm , any other behavior would be out of the norm ,hence abnormal.

and oh btw, any type of abnormality won't be really appreciated by most girls, keep that in mind.

It's logical, captain.

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and keep up your diet.



MDD123
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18 Jul 2009, 9:35 pm

Michjo wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
If it's that much more common in women, why is it so hard for me to find a woman that wants affection?

It's not more common in women, it's just made out to be that way because women tend to be more specific about who they will sleep with than men. You've got two choices, you can wait around until you meet a girl who is like you that you like. Or you can change your expectations, get drunk all the time, goto nightclubs, and go home with strangers. Personally, i'm quite happy waiting for someone, i'm not looking for sex.


That's my kind of gameplan. In the meantime, I go to the gym, read some books, work on that degree, bringing something to the plate gives me a better chance.



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18 Jul 2009, 9:46 pm

No way man. There's no normal when it comes to sex and relationships. It's different from person to person. Just keep being you :)



MDD123
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18 Jul 2009, 9:57 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
Manders wrote:
I too want affection more than sex. Though it seems to be more common in females...


If it's that much more common in women, why is it so hard for me to find a woman that wants affection?




Quote:
Normalcy is derived from the word 'norm', the norm is defined by the majority. Here the definition of 'norm': a standard or model or pattern regarded as typical.

If 99% of guys consider their sexual urges as first priority then this is the typical male behavior so this its norm , any other behavior would be out of the norm ,hence abnormal.

and oh btw, any type of abnormality won't be really appreciated by most girls, keep that in mind.

It's logical, captain.

Image




and keep up your diet.


There's a huge difference between considering your sexual urges and demonstrating them. I just thought I'd point that out because the line is a little blurry sometimes and I've definately made the mistake of coming off like a complete pig.



CerebralDreamer
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19 Jul 2009, 3:46 pm

I always thought I was a bit freakish by desiring affection more than sex, but at least now I know I'm in good company.



MONKEY
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19 Jul 2009, 5:20 pm

I don't think it's abnormal to want affection more than sex, anyway I don't like the idea of just "having sex" when there isn't any love involved, it's just pointless and there's not much you'll get out of just screwing a stranger. With relationships I think you should start with just affection and cuddling, so when the time comes when you do want it you know it's because you're in love and there is alot of emotion going into it and not just physical jumping around on a bed. I do think though it's more common for women than men to want affection more than sex, so compared to other men you're in the minority, but there's nothing "abnormal" about it in my opinion.


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southwestforests
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21 Jul 2009, 1:00 am

My wife and I were friends for several years before we realized we had romantic desires for each other. As it happened, the way our lives had gone we were both starved for affection - just simple, hey I care about you, want to share things with you, want to be in your company, and touch me please goddammit, nobody's even just touched me for soooo looong!! !!

In a way, affection is sex: sex on simmer instead of boil.

Affection can be all sorts of things, not just hugging and snuggling.
It can be a cellphone call like this, "Hey Babe, took a different road there this time and saw this conservation area park so pulled in to check it out. You have got to come see it when we get a chance! Bullfrogs jumping in the lake, iridescent blue dragonflies everywhere, and while I'm not the birdwatcher in the family, heard a Bobwhite. And there's really cool little bridge over the lake's spillway. And there's a little bitty concrete dock with a bench under a willow tree" You recognized something important to her and took time to find it, stop, and share it, and said to her you desire to share it together - and, importantly, you DO desire to share it with her.
Then "make an appointment" to go there together, giving her something to expect, to look forward to. Pack a lunch, or just snacks, go sit on the bench under the willow tree with her, share your snacks, and enjoy "being" with each other.

Then again, there's also times she likes me to grab her and say "You're coming with me, wench!" :twisted: :lol:


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