Should aspies hook up with other aspies?

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25 Feb 2010, 10:54 am

I have been in a relationship with one of each, and I did better with the Aspie girlfriend.

However, I need one who likes to travel, so if she is the type that thinks of a vacation as simply "no computer or video games for a week", then it wouldn't work.

Also, I eventually want to start a family, so if she doesn't want kids, or is asexual, then no go. This is difficult because I have heard that the vast majority of Aspies don't want kids.

In other words, I would need someone with very mild AS like me.

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deadeyexx
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25 Feb 2010, 11:31 am

I prefer NT girls. They make up for the qualities I lack. Opposites really do attract.

CaptainTrips222
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01 Mar 2010, 10:47 pm

hale_bopp wrote:

Electricbassguy wrote:

We shouldn't seek each other out, but we shouldn't avoid people because they are aspies either

probably the best advice here.

Why would you avoid somebody just because they're aspie? Did you ever have a totally bad experience with one? Are you an NT in disguise? (J/k)

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01 Mar 2010, 10:50 pm

RightGalaxy wrote:

aspies should date aspies until you find the aspie for you.
Go to what is considered "nerdy" group activities such as astronomers clubs, science get togethers, nature center activities, etc... AVOID bars, nightclubs, and "social" clubs - concentrate on clubs that have a common interest such as bird watching, etc... not places where there is constant lust, drugs, alcohol, gossip,backstabbing. If you have the nerve, get it around the office that you're looking to meet a "nice" guy or girl. You'd be surprised how many older individuals have lonely nieces or nephews that are shear knockouts in appearance but they are homebodies. Stay away from NT's . We just don't have the skills to be their mates, at least not for a lifetime. The only thing you'll get from an NT is insult added to injury, more mileage on your butt, and maybe even a child...who they won't support. They'll kill whatever esteem you have or you'll end up killing them in a aspie rage...some of us get like that. The other NT's are unmoved by NT insults because they are the same way.
NT's rob most of us out of our savings in exchange for the "promise" of love. Then their other NT mates rob them. Date people of like mind and character. Don't turn your nose up at other races, religions, or ethnicities...BUT they HAVE to be aspie. That quiet little mail bride from Korea will take advantage of you too "if she is NT". Foreign NT"S learn fast and will also "leave you in the dust."

I don't know. Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter seem to have something good going on. Also, we see the NT/AS combination right here on wrongplanet. It happens!

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01 Mar 2010, 11:13 pm

I prefer aspies more because I feel morre sexually attracted to them. For some reason my mind finds them cute. I find AS cuter in women though but I prefer men because I'm female. But I never limited myself to them.

Kilroy
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01 Mar 2010, 11:19 pm

I have not a shred of desire to be with another aspie
not one bit

CaptainTrips222
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01 Mar 2010, 11:35 pm

Kilroy wrote:

I have not a shred of desire to be with another aspie
not one bit

Damn. Bad experience or what?

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02 Mar 2010, 11:21 am

Cad wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

I tend to be unnatracted to aspergers males because I am not attacted to intense personalities.

I tend to enjoy being with laid back people as it does not increase my anxiety.

amen! I have male aspie friends, but the guy I've got my eye on is an NT which means he's much more relaxed about things, and I need someone with their head screwed on right and their feet firmly on the ground. If I dated an aspie i'd go maaadd

That's an over-generalisation. I'm an Aspie and quite laid back - in fact, I've even had people tell me I don't take things seriously enough! Actually, it's a common occurrence!

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02 Mar 2010, 12:13 pm

CaptainTrips222 wrote:

Kilroy wrote:

I have not a shred of desire to be with another aspie
not one bit

Damn. Bad experience or what?

not really I just feel absolutely no connection to them
I've been around NTs for so long I feel weird around people with AS and can't handle or understand them
I could be friends with one, perhaps
but never romantic sort, they usually come with a lot of issues, and I don't want to have to juggle mine and theirs
no thank you

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02 Mar 2010, 12:14 pm

Asp-Z wrote:

Cad wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

I tend to be unnatracted to aspergers males because I am not attacted to intense personalities.

I tend to enjoy being with laid back people as it does not increase my anxiety.

That's an over-generalisation. I'm an Aspie and quite laid back - in fact, I've even had people tell me I don't take things seriously enough! Actually, it's a common occurrence!

but you still have AS, so have certain things in you they don't like
can't please everyone-and not everyone wants to be with someone with AS, even an aspie

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02 Mar 2010, 12:16 pm

Kilroy wrote:

Asp-Z wrote:

Cad wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

I tend to be unnatracted to aspergers males because I am not attacted to intense personalities.

I tend to enjoy being with laid back people as it does not increase my anxiety.

That's an over-generalisation. I'm an Aspie and quite laid back - in fact, I've even had people tell me I don't take things seriously enough! Actually, it's a common occurrence!

but you still have AS, so have certain things in you they don't like
can't please everyone-and not everyone wants to be with someone with AS, even an aspie

Everyone has things in them others won't like, no one can be perfect.

Kilroy
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02 Mar 2010, 12:19 pm

true but as I said, some girls plain don't want to date a guy with AS
guys and girls with AS are quite different
I wouldn't want to date an AS guy, or an AS girl
because I don't like how they act in a lot of ways
friendship is different, because its not personal
if she has touch issues it doesn't matter, I wouldn't touch her anyways
things like that, which would effect a relationship-wouldn't effect a friendship

Asp-Z
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02 Mar 2010, 12:20 pm

Kilroy wrote:

Fair enough, we all have our preferences.

Kilroy
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02 Mar 2010, 12:22 pm

you'd be surprised how angry people get over mine lol

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02 Mar 2010, 12:43 pm

Asp-Z wrote:

Cad wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

I tend to be unnatracted to aspergers males because I am not attacted to intense personalities.

I tend to enjoy being with laid back people as it does not increase my anxiety.

That's an over-generalisation. I'm an Aspie and quite laid back - in fact, I've even had people tell me I don't take things seriously enough! Actually, it's a common occurrence!

Seconded.

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Kilroy
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02 Mar 2010, 12:45 pm

as I said, just because you think you are, or even if you are
some girls plain just dislike AS guys-trying to make them feel bad won't do anything

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