Do you choose to walk alone?

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I find it quite easy to open my hear and surrender all my thoughts, feelings and insecurities to a member of the opposite sex. I just find it near impossible to find a single straight woman I can remotely connect with because most women seem to be only interested in what I consider to be a very shallow way of life. It has made me question whether or not I should continue pursuing a loving relationship, but both my libido and my strong desire to raise kids (at age 28 my biological clock is ticking quite loudly) still don't allow me to pursue a life as a loner for now. Also, I can't stand spending most of my spare time alone. It just gets boring quite easily and I miss the ability to share thoughts and emotions. Meeting friends on a weekly basis just isn't enough for me to satisfy that need.

Try drinking half a bottle and waking up with both a hangover and a poor memory of what happened the night before.

I find it easy to get other people to open up once they trust me. The key to having people open up to you is being open yourself, with the risk of getting hurt.



One issue is our lack of instinctive empathy and the other issue is our disconnection with the NT world. The NT world is quite shallow in my opinion and I really find it hard to talk about things NT people are actually interested in, especially when meeting someone new... which usually ends up with my annoying them with endless chatter about my interests or - in the case of an attractive woman - my total inability to get a conversation started. I'm getting better at the latter, but I still find it difficult to keep a conversation going without annoying the other person by either talking too long or too intensely about a topic they're only marginally interested in.

Yeah, I choose to be single, I've been single for 9 years (soon to be 10), being single the rest of my life is no big deal, if something happens it happens if it doesn't, well oh freaking well, there are a ton of pro's to being single for life.

I have never had a hangover in my life. I don't know why but some have said I've never drank enough, That can't be true though because I drink more than anyone I know other than a former alcoholic friend and a friend's brother is an alcoholic.

If you have a habit of drinking a lot of water with your liquor that could be it.

Well after I get drunk and have been drinking for several hours I will drink plenty of Gatorade before I go to sleep to prevent waking up with a charley horse.

I would find it very hard to open up. Actually, in many ways the hardest thing for me to open up is about my deepest thoughts regarding my special interests--I almost feel that the moment someone else understands them all, that is the moment I will lose myself. Though in fact it is unlikely that anyone COULD understand all of what is going on in my head, so that might be a moot point. Though it still adds one more to the multitude of reasons I am most drawn to women who are into things that are really different than I am--the most important being that I want someone to show me the things I can't see with my own "eyes" so to speak, to make me feel like I am less off in a corner of the world.

But anyway, I totally don't understand why a relationship has to involve surrendering all thoughts and feelings to another person. Many women unfortunately seem to only want to be sexual with those they could consider doing this with.

Anyway, I'm not old enough (who knows whether I ever will be) that my main motivation for seeking relationships is not to be alone. My reasons are 1), the physical intimacy, and 2), the thrill or "ride" of starting a relationship. That's why I have a feeling my first few might not last long--because I wouldn't want it any other way.

I agree with you on the first part about being alone being better than vain pursuits that got nowhere. And you're also right, women aren't going to make your life new and exciting. That's not what good relationships are about anyway...

But I think there's a difference between giving up the pursuits and giving up hope.

If you're relaxed and content being single, but let yourself be open to possibilities, if the opportunity does arise, you'll be a better partner, and you'll have a better relationship for it. Trust me, I'm not trying to wave a red flag and tell you to get back in the game and fight the good fight and all that. I'm just advising to be open and not give into despair, and it sounds like you're doing a good job of being content in your own skin, so kudos to you!

I am currently choosing to walk alone, even though I do not wish to, I feel it is imperative that I grow, and become more stable in my mind and in my surroundings, before I have a relationship with anyone. I do wish to have a relationship, plus I have found myself having more sexual urges than usual in recent months, but I realise that I cannot place this much emphasis into that part of my life because quite simply it will make things worse and mess up my psyche and desperation will seep its way into my life.

Giving up hope is another thing altogether, and should only really be considered if you have passed a certain point in your life that is far from now. It's always good to maintain balance, having a healthy balance is key to most things in life. So don't go chasing relationships, but don't shut yourself off from girls entirely.

Been there done that and like you I still haven't gotten anywhere with the opposite sex. Here's to hoping.

This is basically the conclusion I came to. Nothing worked. Nothing.

I have things much easier than most of you, I don't want a relationship, ever. That makes my life simple.

The thought of a romantic relationship disgusts me, I am far happier left to my own devices and always have been, even my best friend of 8 years knows not to invite me to a party because I wont go.