Older women?

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I don´t see atractive women of a certain age that much so when I find one that is appealing I can´t help but to look at her and this come become some sort of attraction.

As it has been mentioned before by other users older women are more matter therefore they are likelier to know what they want and the fact that it´s not like you are dating a teenager that might break up with you the following day takes a lot of the pressure of making the relationship smoother.

I wouldn´t mind saying a few famous women of a certain age that I considered appealing however a certain age indicating when are women older would be helpfull since there´s no need to offend any other user.

Yeah I saw devastating as meaning devastatingly beautiful, too. I've also heard people use it this way. I couldn't help looking it up in the OED - it wasn't in common use until the 19th century and it simply means to lay waste. So, you could say that a woman's beauty is such that it lays waste to a man's reason or something like that - so the use of devastating here would seem acceptable.

I agree, big difference between 'being cute' and being in a relationship with another individual. My relationships have not been long,
but I do not have a set 'hold down' period. Maybe I don't understand that whole concept. To me, it doesn't matter if the relationship was 6 months or 3 years,
as long as I can look back on it and say 'ok, wasn't great all the time, was awesome at times and I learnt something.' I also have not been in a lot of 'relationships' (relationships are user defined.. know what I mean?) and I tend to put a lot of time in between them when I do.
Not so much into quantity as I am into quality. People can not understand and in some I think they just cannot except that I will go into periods of
'entering my nunnery' as some have termed it in the past..

This concept that people enter a relationship with an automatic belief almost that 'this is the one' we will be together forever..
I think is not reasonable. If it was, then why would people that got married, get divorce?
It might last forever as well..
I don't go into a relationship, with any expectations, except.. the very basic

In one relationship, we said.. our forever and a day..
my forever and your forever may be different.
But enjoy it and don't also have the belief like some, why bother it is just going to crash and burn..




Yes.. like fire




People have almost always said they have had a hard time understanding me, BUT they seem offended when I say that I do not understand them either.
So if I am unsure of how something is worded and what the person was trying to say, I ask.
But it also developed in me this love for etymology and meanings.

happymusic, I am glad another looked it up. When I read it, I was like umm.. ok he must be meaning this as how many think the word is used.
But I had to ask and then when I realised he had thought that, and couldn't see it meaning the other terms close to it, I thought I should point out the way it actually is used.

Not so much as a lesson in grammar/word definitions.. but I tried to do it lightly and funny..
For one simple reason really.. grammar and spelling Nazis seem to think they are omnipotent
and because some women might not see the humour in it like I did and they may have seen it as insulting.

I also like how you said seemed to work with what he was saying.. because, in a way it did. But with his own response back, it showed it was not how he meant it, because he thought it was like ravishing, which means 'extremely beautiful/attractive' first and 'entrancing' secondary.
Which adds to the whole confusion of the original word devastating.

But, it also adds to the confusion/frustration, for me at least and I think others as well, when someone says
"I think that woman is ravishing beautiful"
Because I hear " I think that woman is extremely beautiful beautiful"

Just like others have been confused, when we have been at a lecture and the guy speaking is amazing with his words and what he is saying, (yet many see
first only how he looks ( Which he may be a sweaty, balding and old guy )) and I say afterwards that I found him to be ravishing.
I found what he was saying and how he said it entrancing.. I was captivated by his words.


Gahh.. I could go on and on like this..
BUT it does show one thing interesting to me..
It really is no wonder that so many people have issues with conversations and understanding others, when you take some things into consideration.

1) How many individuals are actually using words correcting?
2) How many words since people in the older age bracket have had there meanings 'changed' since we learnt them?
3) When a guy says he likes your shoes, he really means he likes you.. This one will always confuse me now.. so I will not use it to gauge that
4) Hardly anyone says what they mean, and find it rude when others do..

No wonder people have so many issues and yet Aspies are in the wrong for speaking bluntly and to the point.
yea that makes a LOT of sense..

From a female's point of view without the love involved, I get along better with women who are older. It just seems a lot of young girls (not all) come off catty and more focused on their image than the person next to them. I'll never forget the time I got to know this girl and her friends. There was a lot of drama and backstabing. I never knew what to expect. I was always afraid they'd say something about me and to my horror they did. I remember a couple of girls telling me what this person or that person was saying, I never really felt like confronting them about it. I was also not well off like many of them but whenever they needed money and I had it, I was always pleased to lend it to them. Well I never got my money back. It quickly detiorated from there. They'd get together without inviting me and some other girls. It was like how this thread describes men alphas and betas. I don't know if I could define this so-called friendship due to gender or classisim. It seems like the girls who were really well off were "popular" among their clique. Anyway it was hard to handle especially whenever I didn't feel like talking on the phone or chitterchatting.

I'm not saying all young girls are like this and yes there are older women that can be catty. However I think you as you get older, your hormones start to stabilize thus mellowing you out. But yeah many of the females I get along with tend to be much older than say 20. It's funny but with guys I'm fine with most of them regardless of age.

just to add another statistic in the mix..

27/m that has always been with older women - my life partner is 9 years older.

Ohh that would be really helpful, but I think it is individual. And older and attractive/attraction can be really complex for some.

Why I say that, is because some do not even seem to think in terms of 'older' at all or any age really.
Like one of my exes, didn't even think to tell his parents about my age. But they had a huge issue with it when they ended up meeting me.
We had spoken on the telephone many times after I moved in with him and it was never brought up by any of us. But when he and I showed up to visit them, after travelling about 4,000km or 2,500 miles and having stress from a bunch of other stupid things that happened along the way, they LOST it. Well truthfully, his mother lost it more, the father just followed the wife.

My ex, did not even think of me as 'older' then him and was offended, horrified and embarrassed over his parents behaviour. He also was able to make matters even worse, when he pointed out the age difference between his parents. Which was in fact a couple years more then ours. But the difference was, I was the oldest in our relationship. That seemed to be one of the biggest issues the mother had and she would not see to reason.

So, how much older (I would add younger, but from personal experience there really is point where someone can be TO YOUNG) someone is than another is not the point. The whole point, is that they are attracted to each other and forget about 'societies' standards of what is acceptable. You may find some some at 30 to old, you may find someone at 50 just perfect for you.

I am a person that is more attracted to grey matter then the bag of skin that holds it. And for me, some people are just to old or to young.
To old to try anything new or different, to young to enjoy other things. Does that make sense?

Like, I can be very attracted to how a person speaks and their knowledge of a subject matter. If they have passion about that subject and it shows in how they speak about it and we are in a heavy discussion of the matter it can be intoxicating for me. There could very well be a very strong attraction for me, but that does not mean I would be so attracted I would consider a 'relationship' with the individual, other then friendship. Partly because that may be the only thing we have in common. One thing is not enough for me to go further then the friendship or acquaintance as I tend to call most people.
Also, for me, most individuals that can do that, seem to be much older and would not have the other interest I have.

I like video games as well, but not just ones where I play, maybe win, maybe loose. Sonic is not enough for me and two player games can be ok, but sometimes not so much. Give me a game where I can be pulled into the 'story line' and characters then I am in heaven, I loved dotHack and FF. Or give me a strategy game of depth, awesome.. anyone remember Nobunaga's Ambition when it first came out? (dating myself again)

Then there is music. And I listen to almost everything and I know it drives many people crazy because of that. If a person listens to something different can introduce me to a new band or style and describe why they like/love it and what the music means to them.. well again, I may be hooked.

If I can find someone that has those kind of traits and likes.. I am in Utopia. But it limits the possibilities of eligible individuals.. and age seems to be a big part of that.

So yes a away to gauge age in the sense of older, would be awesome.

Ohh MissConstrue You may have just said the most brilliant thing ever when it comes to women and the age differences between them
Not the age, but how they act.

It is so simple and plain to see.. how has nobody ever said this before, or made the connection?

There must be others that have said this.. this must have been checked by the medical profession it had to be. It is just so obvious when you said it that way and with the whole context.
Damn it.. I have appointments today, or I would start googling..

Does anyone know if they have tested that between NT and women of the spectrum? and then compared it to males?

I really would love to know. Someone must have it is just so, logical. Maybe umm damn I can't think of the researchers name and I don't want to have to say his cousins name but I am sure you all know who I mean.

You are absolutely right. Age difference issues vary from person to person, there are those who don´t see the age gap as a problem(ie the ex you mention) and those who have a hard time dealing with age difference before even thinking about going out with someone from the opposite sex(I would probably fall on this category if I met a older person I was attracted to).

I have also had trouble with relatives when bringing females home(it´s come to a point where I have spent the last 3 years refusing to bring anyone from the opposite sex home).


I completely agree when you point out that age difference problems are in most cases due to what is acceptable to other people eyes.


I am usually attracted to confidence on the other people, everyone has their own standards and standards vary form one person to another.
Also, for me, most individuals that can do that, seem to be much older and would not have the other interest I have.


I´m also not into typical video games. I have had a ps3 ince it was launched in my country(my parents wanted to buy it as a gift even though I´m not much of a gamer) and the only game I have been into has been green day rockband.

My friends do the hooking over a song and it´s annoying as hell, I play a song I listen to from time to time once and then all of a sudden they decide to put it on their phones and I have to listen to the same song 2-3 times a day if I´m lucky.
My friends hate the music I play on the car and they have to put up with it most of the time. Today it has been hilarious,I put something by paramore I think and one of them started saying you might ass well put music in japanese, I pulled over put some j-rock and continued driving, minutes afterwards he started complaining about how he was joking, I said I wasn´t going to pull over again and my friends had to listen to over 10 girls dead monster songs.



Your last statement defines what I´m looking for on a relationship, if someone accepts me as I am and somehow appreciates it who cares about age.

I've been attracted to a lot of women 10-15 years older than me.

I remember a quote from "Stuart" in "Spin City":

My age range is 20 to 25.

Maybe it could be true, that people with age difference issues
have quote-unquote "problems."

Thinking about it, the important thing to note is that most of the world's beautiful people aren't aged 18-20. Trying to select a mate based on specific traits dealing with age, hair color, height, symmetry and weight is really a puerile pursuit. It ignores the factors that really determine whether a person is good-looking, such as how someone moves and how they're put together. Also, finding someone physically attractive has a lot to do with appreciating his or her genes (although actually, doesn't a person's genetic integrity decrease with age? Oh well). It also fails to address brain power and personality.

Sorry it's taken so long to respond. Haven't checked this site in a few days.

Yeah, that usage isn't that uncommon. As you noticed, this use of "devastating" is more along the lines of "her beauty was so intense that it overwhelmed/devastated all who came in contact with it," which makes this a matter of hyperbole. Hence there isn't a need for a distinct entry in the dictionary to allow for that use of the word (its meaning isn't actually changing).



It sounds to me like you're simply unfamiliar with this use of the word "devastating," but it is an established fact. Maybe it's not as common a synecdoche where you live. Actually, since according to your profile you're considering whether or not you might have Asperger's Syndrome, that kind of literal interpretation might be expected!

Here's a classy example of someone else using it this way (read the caption):
[img][800:638]http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_sgFWN-0a5eQ/TDafR1sT2pI/AAAAAAAAAUA/rL_lua8VJzE/s1600/mstrange3.jpg[/img]

Anyway "devastating beauty" is not meant to be taken literally (usually!) nor is a "devastating angle" actually destructive. Glad to be of help.

A note about my comment about devastating and ravishing: it should have been clear that no one is saying they're literally synonyms. It was unclear exactly what Surya had misunderstood, so it seemed like it would be helpful to imply that in this context the word "devastating" could be replaced with the word "ravishing."

Older women aged 40 - 60 can still be attractive, and seem like more fun then silly young ones who like playing head games.

Nonsense. His use was perfectly valid from a metaphorical sense. The beauty "devastates" the viewer with its sheer power. It's just one step up from "overwhelming".

Also, I don't see how you can possibly argue that his use of "devastating" could be taken to mean "devastatED" or "destroyed", that's ludicrous. It's an entirely different tense.

When I switched schools in America when I was like 14, I had to do a lot of social work because I was a troubled teen - fights with my mom's ex-husband, some drugs, etc. At the public school I went to, the social worker was really hot. She was in her late 20's and so my type: little, skinny, blond, etc. I don't consider myself bad looking, and I get compliments and stares a lot from girls, I have dark eyes and dark hair but light skin so very Jewish looking, and people like to hear my slight accent which is Russian/Slavic. Maybe she thought I was attractive, maybe not. But it was like every little thing I did, she would get mad at me, and it was stuff that didn't even matter, like she was trying to micromanage me. And then about a year ago I had to go to some conference and she was there, she just stared at me from across the room the entire time and we didn't speak, so I made conversation with other people.

But before that, I went to a therapeutic school for other kids who had family and drug problems and I was the youngest kid there. I made really good friends with this one girl who was 18 or so, she really understood me and she was really pretty. Then there was this other girl, who was 17, and I think she was really attracted to me, every time I would talk she would stare at me and always wanted to help me, sit by me, etc. I was so clueless back then

The whole time I was growing up I had crushes on girls who were at least 17 or 18, I can't stand immature girls, the Taylor Swift wannabe type. I need someone more mature than that, and that might mean I'll be with girls in their mid-late 20's until I am that age myself.

Does anyone know what to do with the social worker? Should I Facebook her or something and ask if she wants to get coffee or something? Because I've been thinking about this a lot lately, she really is my type...

In america women are bred and raised like cattle. You are important if you are young, hot and submissive. Any woman over 26 is old and they start to wrinkle, get fat, have babies,start talking like men, get the short haircuts like men, ewwww.