i just want to be loved

Page 3 of 3 [ 47 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3

Previous topic | Next topic

Ancalagon
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Dec 2007
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,302

11 Jul 2010, 1:48 pm

Pistonhead wrote:

It's a fact that kindness is for the weak, that's why dictatorships work at least until someone stronger comes along and kicks the dictator's country's ass. Might makes right.

Your theory contradicts itself. If might makes right, and someone mighty wants to be kind, then it is right to be kind.

Quote:

You think people are always being truly kind to you when your receive kindness from them? Are you ever sure that can't possibly have a motive behind it?

Kindness doesn't stop being kindness just because there might be a motive for being kind.

_________________
"A dead thing can go with the stream, but only a living thing can go against it." --G. K. Chesterton

Janissy
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 May 2009
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,450
Location: x

11 Jul 2010, 3:25 pm

Moog wrote:

I'd say flip it around, Toad; turn it into "I want to love". Instead of waiting to be loved, love yourself, and love others. They will love you back once you work out how to do that. Worked for me.

Yup.

Pistonhead
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 15 Jun 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,732
Location: Bradenton, Florida

11 Jul 2010, 3:28 pm

Ancalagon wrote:

Kindness doesn't stop being kindness just because there might be a motive for being kind.

Ancalagon wrote:

In any case, trying to placate someone who's about to kill you is not kindness.

Contradiction in aisle 3!

In addition someone does not become mighty by being kind so it is YOUR theory that contradicts itself.

_________________
"Some ideals are worth dying for"
==tOGoWPO==

Janissy
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 May 2009
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,450
Location: x

11 Jul 2010, 3:29 pm

Pistonhead wrote:

People will take advantage of you any chance they get. If you are nice to everyone you'll get f'ed over in the end. You'll likely end up being a lot of people's best friends if you act "lovingly". .

I see the first two sentences as being in direct oppostition to the third. On the one hand you say people will take advantage of you. On the other hand you say that they will be your best friends. Do you equate friendship with being effed over and being used?

Janissy
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 May 2009
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,450
Location: x

11 Jul 2010, 3:33 pm

Pistonhead wrote:

Obviously not everyone is only out there to gratify ONLY themselves but it's safer to assume that they are than to go out and love everyone and show compassion, positive feelings and all that other lame bullsh*t. It's just a known fact that nobody can mess with you if you play things the hard way so to speak, where as when you go easy on everyone you're going to lose something in the process. Sanity, money, time, etc. You name it, it will disappear. If you want to be wise about it you would start being a complete as*hole and gradually work your way down to being "nice enough". If you have to you would move on at the first sign of trouble. Granted this isn't entirely possible if you have a shred of decency in you.

If you always act towards people with the assumption that they are just waiting for a chance to screw you over, you actually increase the chances you will be screwed over. You make enemies, or at least people who don't care what happens to you, and then there is nobody to give you a helping hand when you need it. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you are mean to people, they will be mean right back and the ones who are tender hearted will simply avoid you and go give a helping hand to somebody else.

Pistonhead
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 15 Jun 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,732
Location: Bradenton, Florida

11 Jul 2010, 3:35 pm

Janissy wrote:

I see the first two sentences as being in direct opposition to the third. On the one hand you say people will take advantage of you. On the other hand you say that they will be your best friends. Do you equate friendship with being effed over and being used?

Yes, if you notice I said you will be THEIR best friend not your best friend. Nothing in direct opposition about it. Just goes to show that being a best friend and being someones b*tch can be the same thing.

_________________
"Some ideals are worth dying for"
==tOGoWPO==

Janissy
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 May 2009
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,450
Location: x

11 Jul 2010, 3:36 pm

Anyway...back to Toad. Read all of Moog's posts. I believe that he is right.

Pistonhead
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 15 Jun 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,732
Location: Bradenton, Florida

11 Jul 2010, 3:47 pm

Janissy wrote:

You make enemies, or at least people who don't care what happens to you, and then there is nobody to give you a helping hand when you need it.

Then you don't rely on anyone, as you never should anyways.

_________________
"Some ideals are worth dying for"
==tOGoWPO==

Ancalagon
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Dec 2007
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,302

11 Jul 2010, 4:25 pm

Pistonhead wrote:

Ancalagon wrote:

Kindness doesn't stop being kindness just because there might be a motive for being kind.

Ancalagon wrote:

In any case, trying to placate someone who's about to kill you is not kindness.

Contradiction in aisle 3!

The first was referring to mixed motives, i.e., I'll scratch your back in the hopes that you'll scratch mine.

Quote:

In addition someone does not become mighty by being kind so it is YOUR theory that contradicts itself.

Actually I said that kindness is unrelated to strength, not that it makes you strong.

_________________
"A dead thing can go with the stream, but only a living thing can go against it." --G. K. Chesterton

ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

11 Jul 2010, 6:53 pm

Guys, i didnt want this to turn into a huge flame fest... I just wanted to know why feeling loved is so impossible in this days world. The Golden Rule is something that many religious and philosophical figures ascribe to, so if I give as much of my love out to others as possible, I should at least get some of it back, right? But I'm not...

foreveryoung
Deinonychus

Joined: 27 Jun 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 398

11 Jul 2010, 7:56 pm

Toad, I'm not saying abandon all of your religious views, but they are quite naive. It's almost like you go to church and hang out at the church because you want to hide from the evil in the world. Well, I got news for you. Some, if not most of the people you know from church have their dark sides too. They fight with their spouses, they have crazy sex, they make fun of people.

I know you've chosen to hide from your dark side and take on the role of a choir boy...but that doesn't mean you're guaranteed the love of a woman. Ricky5 gave you some great advice that has nothing to do with getting an escort or sex.

In fact, it's probably easier to get sex than it is to get what you want...co-dependent type of love...a self-made prison of sorts...not an actual loving relationship. You want a woman to stand by you no matter what, for no reason other than that you're a human being. Being human and not having a criminal record doesn't entitle you to a significant other.

And Toad, I thought we already talked about this, that you weren't going to worry about women and dating until you graduated college and left the house?

You can continue to be this misunderstood wannabe choir boy living in a mean world, but it isn't going to get you what you want.

RICKY5
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Dec 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,201

11 Jul 2010, 9:15 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:

Toad,

Do not interpret us trying to help you as us flaming you. Truth be told, I actually like you quite a bit. You have great good qualities that need to be able to truly shine but they are buried under the self-loathing you have drowns out your good traits. Affection is not something you will get from being a good little boy. You have to go out and take it. Character modeling helps as well.

RICKY5
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Dec 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,201

11 Jul 2010, 9:36 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:

That wonderful fallen (if you believe in original
Sin) mudball known as earth doesn't give two craps about how good you are. Your only reward for doing good is in the afterlife. So you've got 50+ years until ass cancer or something just as hilarious strikes you down and you can enjoy the rewards of love in heaven. 50 years is a long assed time to mope nonstop. Have some joy in your life. I have comics, things that go bang, and ladies of the evening.

What do you have? Video gamer?

ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

11 Jul 2010, 11:49 pm

RICKY5 wrote:

Do not interpret us trying to help you as us flaming you. Truth be told, I actually like you quite a bit. You have great good qualities that need to be able to truly shine but they are buried under the self-loathing you have drowns out your good traits.

I wasn't talking about you. Yes, you do offer good advice, at least for the kind of thing you're looking for. But I'm not looking for a quick lay as you are. Nothing wrong with wanting that, but it's just not what i need at this point.

RICKY5
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Dec 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,201

12 Jul 2010, 4:52 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:

]
I wasn't talking about you. Yes, you do offer good advice, at least for the kind of thing you're looking for. But I'm not looking for a quick lay as you are. Nothing wrong with wanting that, but it's just not what i need at this point.

The advice I give you can be applied to what you are looking for. It is meant to help you get your foot in the door. People are superficial so you just need to be able to get past the superficiality so that others can enjoy your good traits.

Page 3 of 3 [ 47 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3

Jump to:

i just want to be loved Post Reply New Topic

i just want to be loved