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Messaging on a dating site: what to say in the intro?

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Major_G
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16 Feb 2011, 7:17 pm

Quartz11 wrote:
Yeah, I'm having little luck with this still.

It's getting disappointing, but I press onward anyway.

I was on OK Cupid for about 4 years before I ever got a date. That was about 2 years ago and I haven't had any luck since.



Dilbert
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16 Feb 2011, 8:24 pm

Say hi, compliment the profile, and ask a question about something in the profile (clarification, more details etc...). A question is the key. It shows you are interested and you've read the profile, and it is more likely to get you an answer.

Don't message people that are much more beautiful, or people with fit bodies (if you aren't) and wonder why you aren't getting replies. Almost everyone looks at the pictures first.



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16 Feb 2011, 9:00 pm

yeah, I stick to making comments based on something I saw in the profile. And never mentioned anything about appearances.



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17 Feb 2011, 2:40 am

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/onlin ... t-message/
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/the-b ... rst-dates/


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Quartz11
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18 Feb 2011, 12:42 pm

Alright. So one gal recently I got a reply to my first message. Nothing to the second.

Damn. Back to the drawing board...



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18 Feb 2011, 2:01 pm

I got no reply to my message on Aspie Affection and no reply to my Ok cupid message. Not sure i feel like putting myself out there again. At least i can summarise the first one didnt reject me because i'm an aspie. I think my okcupid profile probably needs a total overhall with a new pic and the pretense of being a normal happy go lucky successful guy added to it. It's not gonna take them long to find out the truth though so why bother?



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18 Feb 2011, 4:41 pm

Quartz11 wrote:
Alright. So one gal recently I got a reply to my first message. Nothing to the second.

Damn. Back to the drawing board...

No! Try again. Send another message to show you are serious. Be funny. If she's a geek try: I can has reply??? Or whatever.

Dating isn't like Wile E Coyote: trying once and if it fails giving up. You need to be persistent. Show the woman she's really wanted for who she is, and not wanted because she happens to have a vagina.



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18 Feb 2011, 4:45 pm

Dilbert wrote:
Quartz11 wrote:
Alright. So one gal recently I got a reply to my first message. Nothing to the second.

Damn. Back to the drawing board...

No! Try again. Send another message to show you are serious. Be funny. If she's a geek try: I can has reply??? Or whatever.

Dating isn't like Wile E Coyote: trying once and if it fails giving up. You need to be persistent. Show the woman she's really wanted for who she is, and not wanted because she happens to have a vagina.


I would like to add that he should wait a few days before sending the second reply. You don't want to seem pushy.



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18 Feb 2011, 5:34 pm

Dilbert wrote:
Quartz11 wrote:
Alright. So one gal recently I got a reply to my first message. Nothing to the second.

Damn. Back to the drawing board...

No! Try again. Send another message to show you are serious. Be funny. If she's a geek try: I can has reply??? Or whatever.

Dating isn't like Wile E Coyote: trying once and if it fails giving up. You need to be persistent. Show the woman she's really wanted for who she is, and not wanted because she happens to have a vagina.


I think you've got the wrong idea about Mr coyote there friend. That does give me an idea for a business though. AspieCorp- We build products to help aspies get laid!



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18 Feb 2011, 5:44 pm

Jono wrote:
I would like to add that he should wait a few days before sending the second reply. You don't want to seem pushy.


Yes. Three days is just about perfect.

jamieboy wrote:
I think you've got the wrong idea about Mr coyote there friend. That does give me an idea for a business though. AspieCorp- We build products to help aspies get laid!


...What? :?



jamieboy
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18 Feb 2011, 5:46 pm

It was an attempt at humour. :oops:



Dilbert
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18 Feb 2011, 8:35 pm

Yeah I know. But I didn't get it. :P



Quartz11
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19 Feb 2011, 8:09 pm

Dilbert wrote:
Quartz11 wrote:
Alright. So one gal recently I got a reply to my first message. Nothing to the second.

Damn. Back to the drawing board...

No! Try again. Send another message to show you are serious. Be funny. If she's a geek try: I can has reply??? Or whatever.

Dating isn't like Wile E Coyote: trying once and if it fails giving up. You need to be persistent. Show the woman she's really wanted for who she is, and not wanted because she happens to have a vagina.


I figure if she ain't interested, she ain't interested.

That and she is a Christian. I answered a few questions there which make me openly antagonistic towards Christians, which 99% of the time I am. I figure if there was a good Christian girl who was liberal enough, wasn't a b***h about it, and didn't mind me remaining agnostic/deist then good. Turns out, she just wants another Christian. Good luck finding that in Massachusetts.