How many girls on wrongplanet say aspie's are their type?

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hale_bopp
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17 Feb 2011, 2:38 am

MrDiamondMind wrote:
sunshower wrote:
MrDiamondMind wrote:
sunshower wrote:
As hale_bopp said; personality, not neurology, is what's important.

Of course, much of personality depends on neurology.


I disagree. Neurology is one (of many) factors that influence personality, but personality doesn't "depend" on neurology.

I said much, not all, of personality depends on neurology. In neurological conditions such as AS, personality is very noticeably dependent on the condition.


It depends. If you're talking about someone being "intense" or "laid back" maybe. But the majority of the personality has nothing to do with what the person has.

For example: Loves animals, is kind and respects people, nothing to do with neurology.



Laz
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17 Feb 2011, 3:49 am

A personality will not truly develop without the prescence of stimulation. Without stimulation the mind will fail to thrive. You should spend time working with some of the orphanage children of eastern europe. Most were born with no genetic conditions or health problems and they are entirely dependent and disabled young adults with no significant development beyond early infancy. This was due in part to them being left alone with only basic health needs provided for, no stimulation, no play and you as a consequence have adult bodies with infantile brains that have little or no significant brain development.

Without environmental factors or stimuli your not going to have any personality because you won't have a fully developed brain to begin with.


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aussiebloke
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19 Feb 2011, 7:26 pm

raisedbyignorance wrote:
Aspie AND NT guys both have a tendency to treat me in the same manner...always constantly teasing me, insulting me, or making jokes that makes me more uncomfortable.


Really so why do you put up with it? why not stay alone isolate yourself, stick to your pets I know I am very liked by them :)

Anyway answer to the op if women like irritating or pitiful men yes an aspie male would be right up your ally...


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Chronos
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20 Feb 2011, 4:41 am

Of all the people I have met in real life, on the spectrum, they have all had very different personalities from one another as well as differences in the way and degree their spectrum traits manifested.

And not all men with AS have the relationship problems of many of the men on this forum.



TallulahPip
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20 Feb 2011, 9:59 am

Although their personalities were very different, out of my three most important relationships, 2 have been diagnosed with AS. The third is likely just undiagnosed. I would have to say that aspies are my type. I am very attracted to the stereotypical aspie traits. Not to objectify or generalize at all...there's so much more to it. But the underlying AS is there.



mangos
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20 Feb 2011, 11:11 am

I don't consciously go out looking for guys with AS per se, but my dad clearly had raging and undiagnosed AS :lol: so I think AS traits at least feel somewhat comfortable and familiar to me. Probably at least half of my serious boyfriends were somewhere on the AS spectrum (usually mild though, except for one person). I probably end up with a lot of AS-type boyfriends because I value intelligence and critical thinking in a partner, and I also tend to think that "engineer types" are cute. I also don't have too many expectations in terms of wanting my boyfriend to be a social butterfly--I really don't care if he's shy or acts a little odd in public or wants to spend Saturday night sitting at home reading, so I guess that attracts them to me too.



TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB
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20 Feb 2011, 4:49 pm

mangos wrote:
I don't consciously go out looking for guys with AS per se, but my dad clearly had raging and undiagnosed AS :lol: so I think AS traits at least feel somewhat comfortable and familiar to me. Probably at least half of my serious boyfriends were somewhere on the AS spectrum (usually mild though, except for one person). I probably end up with a lot of AS-type boyfriends because I value intelligence and critical thinking in a partner, and I also tend to think that "engineer types" are cute. I also don't have too many expectations in terms of wanting my boyfriend to be a social butterfly--I really don't care if he's shy or acts a little odd in public or wants to spend Saturday night sitting at home reading, so I guess that attracts them to me too.

wow where do i find girls like you where i'm from? :D



TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB
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20 Feb 2011, 4:51 pm

TallulahPip wrote:
Although their personalities were very different, out of my three most important relationships, 2 have been diagnosed with AS. The third is likely just undiagnosed. I would have to say that aspies are my type. I am very attracted to the stereotypical aspie traits. Not to objectify or generalize at all...there's so much more to it. But the underlying AS is there.

i always thought girls were only attracted to neurotypical traits.
its nice to here there is someone who goes for stereotypical aspies traits =]



TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB
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20 Feb 2011, 4:54 pm

Chronos wrote:
Of all the people I have met in real life, on the spectrum, they have all had very different personalities from one another as well as differences in the way and degree their spectrum traits manifested.

And not all men with AS have the relationship problems of many of the men on this forum.

is an AS mans relationship problems be due to his AS or his personality?



MrDiamondMind
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20 Feb 2011, 5:58 pm

Chronos wrote:
Of all the people I have met in real life, on the spectrum, they have all had very different personalities from one another as well as differences in the way and degree their spectrum traits manifested.

And not all men with AS have the relationship problems of many of the men on this forum.

Well, yes, I would expect them to be different. Even very different. Neurotypicals also vary wildly in personality from one another. But aspergian variances in personality can be classified as aspergian ones, and neurotypical variances as neurotypical ones.



HopeGrows
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20 Feb 2011, 8:43 pm

TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB wrote:
Chronos wrote:
Of all the people I have met in real life, on the spectrum, they have all had very different personalities from one another as well as differences in the way and degree their spectrum traits manifested.

And not all men with AS have the relationship problems of many of the men on this forum.

is an AS mans relationship problems be due to his AS or his personality?


Well, I guess that's the $1M question, isn't it? And the answer is: yes. :?

Some Aspie traits can make relationships more difficult, but there are so many other factors involved I'm not sure how one would compartmentalize it down to a choice between AS or personality. When trying to figure out why an Aspie has relationship issues, you'd have to consider AS, co-morbid conditions, character, morality, values, attitude, coping skills.....the list is endless. I'm friends with Aspies that I hold in very high esteem: awesome people with outstanding character and amazing attitudes. I think many of them are good mates or would make good mates. My dating experiences with Aspies hasn't been nearly as positive, but I think AS played a very minor role in the demise of those relationships. I had some inaccurate, preconceived notions about AS (based on reputable sources, mind you), and accepted some behaviors that I never would have from an NT partner. (I dated one Aspie who blamed his refusal to talk on the phone on AS....he even told me he didn't have a phone. I later found out that it really would have been awkward for him to talk on the phone - particularly if his wife overheard the conversation. He was actually still living with her when he started dating me. Ouch.)

IMO, there's no easy formula here. You have to consider each person in his/her totality, and go from there. It's worth noting that the Aspies I've known who are good partner material have all been willing to work on themselves and their own relationship skills. IMO, that effort produces a lot more success than whining or beating one's head against a brick wall. :shrug:


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FunnyFairytale
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04 Mar 2011, 2:47 pm

Yessssss,

one more here.



zen_mistress
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04 Mar 2011, 2:58 pm

For me, yes I have dated 4 men on the spectrum. 3 were excellent boyfriends, and one I had some real problems relating to and it ended badly.

I guess I have an advantage with dating aspie men as I understand them and I give them a lot of leeway as I know how important things are like routines and their interests.

However, if they dont extend the courtesy towards me that I want and make some effort towards me, then there is no point in dating them. I have needs too, and whether they are taking me for granted because their brain is not designed to look after my needs, or whether they just dont want to, it doesnt really matter, because there is still an issue:

there is no point in me making all this effort, and if the guy I am with is finding me too high maintenance, well it is time we both went looking for other people, as my needs arent being met, and he is feeling too many demands on him. It just doesnt work when two people have different ideas about what a relationship should be.


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Lene
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04 Mar 2011, 4:53 pm

'Aspies' aren't my type. If I was single and a person who I liked and got along with happened to have AS (and it wasn't their go-to excuse for every issue in the relationship), then sure, why not?



bewarethebob
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04 Mar 2011, 7:36 pm

TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB wrote:
If your a girl and always seem to go for an aspie for your boyfriend then write a reply below.


i am a boy that likes aspie gals :}