How do you normally act when you are flirted with?

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I have no idea. I have no idea whether anyone's ever tried to flirt with me - if they did it was useless because I didn't notice. I have wondered a couple of times, but then been 100% certain that they weren't flirting with me anyway (said times were online, by friend who are already taken. And they're not that kind of people.)

Flirting quite honestly terrifies me. I have no idea what the girl intends by it and just about always prefer a "normal" conversation. So I just kind of let the girl do whatever (I'm too scared to say "no" to her) and pray that she'll leave me alone once she's had her fun. I never initiate flirtatious conversations. I can go up to a girl and just talk normally, but can't go up to her and display any kind of sexual side. This leaves me in a kind of odd position because I really do want some meaningful sexual contact with members of the opposite sex... but am in absolutely no position to obtain it, unless they are very direct about it (for example, if a girl says directly to me that she wants to do some kind of sexual thing... which has actually happened three times, believe it or not).

As of now, I'm just trying to be an "ice king" type because I doubt I could function all that well in a normal "relationship." I need to do a lot of work on my mind/psyche/neurology/whatever before I'll be ready for that.

I am like the above poster. Flirting terrifies me because I am always sure it is some cruel joke being played on me. If someone flirts with me, my first instinct is to go on the defensive. If I am unsure as to whether the flirting is genuine or not, I will not bother to try and figure it out and will simply try my best to avoid that person in the future, or if that is not a possibility I will just ignore it.

For better or worse I almost always see it, though what I do depends on the mode its expressed in.

Really attractive girl beaming at me - I usually just keep a straight face and effectively ignore it (though my nonverbals probably show I'm very aware of it and just trying to sheild myself). Being glowed at sucks because, well, there's nothing you can do with it, smiling back really doesn't seem to start a conversation, and if anything it's really not good for much of anything than feeling uncomfortable or like she's setting up my personality to be way more than what it is - I've had LOTS of irritations with that in the past. There's probably nothing you really can do usually but just not react and hold it down.

If she does subtle bits of the beam but actually talks to me - I'm totally down and I'll talk to her just as long as she's ok with keeping it straight and not getting giddy with things. Thankfully the latter doesn't happen to me, probably because in the last few years I've been able to drop that disney character cuteness girls like that used to latch on to.

If she gives me the evil staredown like she wants to drop me, not as bad as being beemed at but again, can't do much with that unless I have a conversation. At least on the bright side a girl who does that usually will.

If a girl does the whole brushing past me and "hey, hands off the merchandise" or does something cocky - see that a lot more rarely but that kind of banter I can at least play back at. Problem is they keep it up and while I'm good for a few witty responses they usually can fire that stuff off with lightning speed and by round three I'm already just about covering up like "Ahhhh!! ! Nooo!!" - guess being able to keep up with the pace of that is more of an NT thing.

If it's a girl who irritates me though, usually thats if they come off shady or I know they're a problem (usually that's the trouble more often than looks) I'll blatantly ignore and kinda send the message that I'm pissed they'd have the nerve to try.

Confused, I not been flirted by women many times in my life.

I agree, I get suspicious if a guy flirts with me. Because ususally guys rarely notice me, I think that the flirting is not sincere.

Nervous. Stuttering. Am clumsy. Once or twice I passed out. I lack confidence when it comes to flirting. Much less talking.

Last edited by whiteskunk on 27 Jul 2006, 2:25 am, edited 1 time in total.

If a girl is flirting with me, I will either flirt back or tell her that I'm not interested. It depends on my mood, really.

asuming that you can tell if someone is fluriting with you. the question should be is how do you know when someone is flirting with you

I've always been really bad at telling when someone is flirting with me, mostly it has to be pointed out to me. And i don't flirt, other then a few looks perhaps, but certainly not wiht conversation. If i like someone i talk to them, but proper talk not flirty stuff. I've never really understood it.
I really don't like men trying to flirt with me because i like girls and i kinda get offended, i had a guy flirt with me (at least i assumed that was what he was doing) in a gay club once, that really annoyed me!! Guys make me feel uncomfortable but girls are fine...only they have to be really blatant and come and talk to me because i wont go up and talk to them. I hardly ever iniate conversations with strangers , even good looking ones.
The thing i don't like about flirt is its insinceraty. If i like someone, i like someone, i'd just tell them not spend hours playing complicated games. I know that many people love to flirt but i just can't get my head around it.

I also can't take compliments, i don't get why people would make a personal comment about some one else (nice or derogatory) If someone compliments me i assume that their offering their honest oppinion ( which apparantly is not allways the case.)and i used to just laugh or something but i have since learnt to say thank you. Still don't like them though.

Wow... reading these made me realise im not the only one in this boat. In all honesty, I have no idea how to return affection, provided i pick up on it. Most of the time I dont realise until an hour later. Not the best experience

I'll add something:
If an average-looking or a not-so-attractive girl smiles at me and/or talks to me - I become very flattered and try flirting back with her; obviously, I do my best not to show desperation.

Basically, the higher she is on the attractiveness scale, the more likely I am to brush off her flirting as teasing, a mean joke, or her just being friendly. Depending on the circumstances and the vibe I get, I either give a hurtful comeback, a backhanded compliment, or a bunch of polite answers that clearly show my lack of interest. This caused me to make a mistake I still regret. A cute girl was flirting with me in a dance class for weeks, while I dismissed it all as her just being friendly to a fellow student. To be exact, she'd always get closer than the given dance required, and I guess that slipped right past me.

Something else, if you actually do tease her like that and do give her backhanded compliments its supposed to work wonders for attraction and the more attractive she is the more you're almost better off being blatantly rude about it (though in a funny way if possible). Sounds like you kinda are taking things about the best way you really can.

I freeze. Unless I know it's someone who isn't interested in me, such as a straight female friend or a gay guy, then I play along with the joke.
I find it kind of hard to tell when people are flirting with me though.

What's flirting? You are asking the wrong guy.

Seriously, the only time I recognised flirting was too late. I'm sure I missed the offer of a 3some once. My one and only chance - I am married now. My wife is the sister of a guy I liked. I didn't have to ask her out, she asked me.

She says she has seen women practically throw themselves at me. The only line I ever picked up on was "why don't you have me for lunch sometime".

I wish I had a "spotter". I used to have a couple of gay friends. Had I known about AS I would have asked them to "spot" for me - tell me when Im being hit on or flirted with.