19 Mar 2011, 10:01 am
19 Mar 2011, 10:13 am
@the two above me
19 Mar 2011, 10:55 am
The_Face_of_Boo
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19 Mar 2011, 11:21 am
19 Mar 2011, 11:36 am
CanadianRose wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
It's time for those of you out there that blame others for your own problems to man up and accept this. I know it's hard to do that, but that's what distinguishes the men from the boys (or the women from the girls, whichever your case may be).
The fact that you are taking ownership of your life is good.
I am a 40 year old woman. I met my boyfriend (now husband) when I was 31. I was quite luckless at love for the most part before then. It wasn't "mens" fault. If I was putting myself into situations where the men around me didn't find me attractive - I needed to either change myself or change my situations. Over the years, I probably did a little of both. I changed my social situation. I was going to a very conservative church at the time and, frankly, the men THERE were a shallow lot. These men were not representative of all men - it was just a shallow social mix. I left this church and started socializing in other places (clubs, hobbies, etc). I found the men in these places more easy going and less shallow.
I also worked on myself. I started being more positive. I looked on the bright side of life. I spent more time sharing with people about good things that I noticed and stopped complaining so much. I took an active interest in people around me. I would speak to people about their interests and share positive things about my own. I kept negative and judgmental comments to myself. I started being a more interesting and engaging person to be around.
I don't understand why people are so obsessed with relationships, but neurotypicals like to make a fuss about their built-in need to socialize, and I guess many aspies are the same. I'm single and looking, but not single and unhappy.
If you absolutely must be in a romantic relationship to be happy, you have a much better chance of finding someone if you loosen up a little. You're less likely to start talking about your father issues on the first date. You won't start a conversation by saying you haven't had a girlfriend in years. You won't talk endlessly about your problems. You won't start having doubts when she tells you her biological father died at the age of 50 (bad genes
). You won't give up when you learn that the death was alcohol-induced.
I'm not joking. Recently, someone sent me a message that went something like this: "Hello! I haven't had a girlfriend in a really long time." We talked for a while, he said the same thing again, and I said "I haven't been in a long-term relationship either. I've met some people here, but nothing's lasted long". Then he just said "I'm not into things that don't last". He spoke like he was looking for a one-night stand, but apparently not... (I wasn't either, BTW.) Another guy said he had just been rejected by a woman and it was eating him up inside. He'd say something and if I didn't reply within seconds, it was "Oh, you couldn't care less, right?"
I blogged about dating once. I can almost see a part two coming up
19 Mar 2011, 1:18 pm
chinatown wrote:
I don't understand why people are so obsessed with relationships, but neurotypicals like to make a fuss about their built-in need to socialize, and I guess many aspies are the same. I'm single and looking, but not single and unhappy.
AS doesn't exclude those affected from the social needs of other humans. It just screws with one's ability to socialize and obtain the social needs. As much as we'd all love to ignore that fact here, it is very much present...
Quote:
If you absolutely must be in a romantic relationship to be happy, you have a much better chance of finding someone if you loosen up a little. You're less likely to start talking about your father issues on the first date. You won't start a conversation by saying you haven't had a girlfriend in years. You won't talk endlessly about your problems. You won't start having doubts when she tells you her biological father died at the age of 50 (bad genes ). You won't give up when you learn that the death was alcohol-induced.
I'm not joking. Recently, someone sent me a message that went something like this: "Hello! I haven't had a girlfriend in a really long time." We talked for a while, he said the same thing again, and I said "I haven't been in a long-term relationship either. I've met some people here, but nothing's lasted long". Then he just said "I'm not into things that don't last". He spoke like he was looking for a one-night stand, but apparently not... (I wasn't either, BTW.) Another guy said he had just been rejected by a woman and it was eating him up inside. He'd say something and if I didn't reply within seconds, it was "Oh, you couldn't care less, right?"
I blogged about dating once. I can almost see a part two coming up
). You won't give up when you learn that the death was alcohol-induced.I'm not joking. Recently, someone sent me a message that went something like this: "Hello! I haven't had a girlfriend in a really long time." We talked for a while, he said the same thing again, and I said "I haven't been in a long-term relationship either. I've met some people here, but nothing's lasted long". Then he just said "I'm not into things that don't last". He spoke like he was looking for a one-night stand, but apparently not... (I wasn't either, BTW.) Another guy said he had just been rejected by a woman and it was eating him up inside. He'd say something and if I didn't reply within seconds, it was "Oh, you couldn't care less, right?"
I blogged about dating once. I can almost see a part two coming up
If you think all that is bad, you haven't seen what some of the guys here say... they refuse to believe that they're the problem and would rather blame women.
19 Mar 2011, 1:19 pm
but didn't you know..
19 Mar 2011, 1:50 pm
19 Mar 2011, 2:14 pm
The_Face_of_Boo
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19 Mar 2011, 2:41 pm
emlion wrote:
but didn't you know..
[img]http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2010/6/3/129200472230986472.png[/img
[img]http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2010/6/3/129200472230986472.png[/img
They needed a math equation to figure out the obvious?
19 Mar 2011, 2:42 pm
well there's always someone out there who wants the 'proof'.
there is it.
we're evil. 
The_Face_of_Boo
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19 Mar 2011, 2:43 pm
but in nature, the root of all evil is the testosterone.
19 Mar 2011, 8:14 pm
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
but in nature, the root of all evil is the testosterone.
and testosterone is the root of all sexual desire... I'm pretty sure most people, gender aside, are unwilling to give THAT up.
19 Mar 2011, 8:21 pm
draelynn wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
but in nature, the root of all evil is the testosterone.
and testosterone is the root of all sexual desire... I'm pretty sure most people, gender aside, are unwilling to give THAT up.
I'm perfectly willing to give THAT up
19 Mar 2011, 8:23 pm
Peko wrote:
draelynn wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
but in nature, the root of all evil is the testosterone.
and testosterone is the root of all sexual desire... I'm pretty sure most people, gender aside, are unwilling to give THAT up.
I'm perfectly willing to give THAT up
That's why I was careful to not say ALL...
techstepgenr8tion
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19 Mar 2011, 8:37 pm
