Dying alone

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Me too.

This is something I mentioned to others several posts ago.

And yes. This is my one and only fear. But I accept what fate has or will have for me. But in one sense. We are never alone as long as we have friends that care.

It used to be my fear. But now I lowered my standards so much, I'm practically scraping rock bottom. This worked out fairly well, and as a result, I've been on a dates as recently as a few months ago. So now that I only go for girls who aren't likely to find someone better than me, I'm absolutely sure that I'll find someone to grow old with.

Don't get me wrong; despite the seemingly dominating attitude, it's nothing like it, and I intend to treat my future girlfriend very well. I know there's a minimum level of quality most people expect in relationships, and I'm planning to give well above that. The point is that I have a lot to give; lowering my standards helps me find a recipient.

I've just lowered my expectations of society, the whole dating scene's a joke pretty much. Its funny how I'm always getting flirted with, even just went through McDonalds and had the cashier bolt upright and watched her pupils go wompwomp - pfff, doesn't mean s--- because you realize that as a guy looks go only as far as them realizing your not joe typical, not a frat boy, not a fighter, not mister excitement, having an atypical personality no matter if that's in a good way or not is pretty much the coupe de gras on everything. F--- it, I don't think I really want someone comming in and judging every last little thing about me in my own sanctuary that would be my private time. If I ever meet someone who's enough like me to be as interesting as one of my best guy friends but everything else in tact too then that might be one thing but from what I'm seeing the line-up or personality traits and preferences I'd need in someone like that are next to if not impossible.

Even if you're in a deep and loving relationship, there's no guarantee that you'll be the first to die. And if you are, is it really fair to WANT that, i.e. to expect the one you love to help you through your death and then face his or hers on their own?

On the plus side, if all of your friends are on Wrong Planet, don't forget to post an "I am dying" message and then you'll have lots of friendly support

I worry about it every day.

Still, whether its you shouldering living by yourself after they pass or them I take it that the whole 'dying alone' concept means not having a really strong bond, a solid relationship, someone at least something like a soulmate or at least on the more practical realistic non-storybook ways at all from the age your thinking about it on out until you die. Yeah, if you lived your entire life without having that I'd imagine you'd feel hardened enough, absorbed the pain over years, and not really care as much when you got there. Then again I think if you did have a solid companion in life who stayed with you till you died you had someone else carrying your energies, your resonance, holding the mirror image of you - the you that's on the other end that you can't see but what other peopel feel, much more strongly than anyone else did, someone who grew with you, knew you as a young adult, felt what you felt, grew up with you, grew old with you, this world is s--- but that kind of thing is just priceless. Even if they did die before you did you would be feeling a level of depression from it but the odds of you outliving them by much more than a year or two usually aren't that high if they die when your in your 70s or 80's, that and even if they did die younger it gives you one major bonus - rather than having to live years trying to erase fears of death and teach yourself to just chill with it you'd actually have something to look foreward to because you'd be left with that feeling that someone would be waiting for you on the other side. Yeah, it might all just be tricks of a primate mind but regardless true or untrue its one of those things that actually gives you peace and makes you feel like your life had some serious meaning, love, etc. - if nothing else I think that's just a better way to go out.

Vinzer, you absolutely slay me.

bwah ha! oh, you guys...

Sounds like that's just how it is where you live. Are you sure you're in the right place?

LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

I don't view "dying alone" as simply not having somebody. If I were with somebody and there was no emotional bond, that would be worse than not having anyone.

I am testing the water socially with a few people, both Aspies and NTs, until I meet a woman who I am confident is "the one".

Tim

As long as I have a pulse or live in a county that lets women have freedom to persue their own happiness? Probably not. I wouldn't say its all women, just that it seems to be an unavoidable majority who live, breath, eat, and sleep popular-everything and they tend to shop for guys on how general-purpose or how adherant to the norms their personalities are. That's not the only only obstruction of course but its one of the biggest even before it comes to the PDD and presence issues just because - there's nothing to overlook when you can't get any satisfaction out of talking to someone in the first place and you even moreso know its the same way from their side and every other guy is much closer to just being instinctively on-point with em. Again, not casting judgement or trying to say my way is better, just saying it puts pretty much anyone who's a free thinker or largely self-made person (aka. probably outsider to begin with and driven to be a free-thinker b by their own intrinsic emotional needs) in a really akward position with or without AS. Really seems like if you don't fit some stereotypical archetype and pick up all kinds of personality traits that don't even make sense or are neither here nor there just to 'wear the whole hat' of a particular group or crowd or look right for what you are then your in a bind unless your really that silky-smooth extrovert who can sell it all regardless.

Beautiful post, techstepgenr8tion

“For certain is death for the born
And certain is birth for the dead;
Therefore over the inevitable
Thou shouldst not grieve.”

- Bhagavad Gita

Straight from the domepiece