Aspie Friend/bf is being dishonest

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Communication, I had hoped would improve.
I cannot deny, he is always asking me now if I am 'happy' and if I am alright, and how I am feeling. To him, everyone should always be 'happy' and I take things too seriously in life.
And because of how he reacted before, I tend to not answer at all when he asks, or to just say I am fine or that I don't know how I am feeling.

So now, I don't tend to say if there is a problem, even when he asks what's wrong.
Because I do not want to risk the same reaction as before. Lol. It is ironic really. You got to laugh.

To me, I tend to see lying in very black terms... I find it hard to be able to see a lie every being for a positive reason.
To me, a lie is always told to deceive, to manipulate or to upset, which is why this is so difficult to me.

I have not really told him that checking my weight just makes me feel more secure right now, as I have been doing it for weeks now, and he did not bring it up or seem bothered.
I did tell him last night though that I have dropped 2 ibs in 2 days and that it would upset me if I put it back on again and he didn't understand why.
I don't see why it would bother him if I lose weight or check my weight. I am not underweight, I am just at the lower end for my height.
He is always saying how everyone has their own paths to go down and their own lives to live, and it would contradict that if he was bothered about my losing weight.

If there's one thing my father taught me it's "You are allowed to lie, but you're not allowed to have me find out." These are stupid lies. He is the only one who could realistically touch your stuff.

The fact that he put back the nicotine inhaler may indicate that he realises that losing stuff upsets you. If you make this clear when these situations occur, you might have some success in removing that behaviour. That, or he is a twat, like Tequila said.

I hadn't thought about it like that, but yes. Gives even more weight to my thoughts that this guy is being a twat.

He knows you need stuff like that. You don't need empathy for this, just a little compassion.

If he is an aspie, shouldn't he understand what a meltdown feels like and looks like? If he is responsible for those things going missing, tell him to cut it out! It makes you upset

I would but I can't outright accuse him if I didn't see him take it, can I?
Last time, I ask if he was hiding them from me because he thought I was addicted to them, and he asked why he would do something like that and said he doesn't do things like this.

It was blatantly obvious tonight though when he called me back in when I was hunting for it, because it wasn't there before, and I hadnt told him I was looking for it.
So yes, he is either being a twat, things it is fun to hide things, like a little kid might, or thinks he will somehow stop me from using them if he hides them often enough...which wont happen because I always have spares around the place.
Maybe I should hide his tobacco next time he comes round and see how he takes to it since that is a genuinely unhealthy thing to do.

Once you stoop to his level, you lose the higher ground.

Tricky tricky. Well we have established he lies to you and he has done it before. You don't need to yell at him, you need to talk to him and get to the root of the problem before it gets worse

I have never yelled at him, don't think I could either. In fact, I often just let things slip by to avoid any problems.
I dont really know how to broach the topic with him, without making him defensive, which I am sure will be a reaction if I outright ask him why he did these things.
I might just keep a distance for a day and not answer the door when he comes round until I decide what to say.

Grae; you know what you know. He did what he did and lied about it.

Everyone has done something they've lied about. When I'm confronted with something I've done and lied about; I come completely clean and admit it and apologise. But not everyone is like this.

Showing some liars proof that they lied gets you nowhere. Is this how you know your 52 year old man to be? You wrote;

Can you accept that he does creepy no-boundry things from time to time, which he will lie about? Accept him as he is?

I think your choices are accept him as he is or not.

I don't know if I can accept these behaviours from him, no, because if he can lie about these little things, then surely, he could lie about all kinds of other things as well, including more serious things.

I think the main issue I am having is, if he cares enough to sort out the stinky sewage problem I was having, why doesn't he care enough to not cause me upset by messing with my inhalators and my weight tickets and disrespect me by lying about it and feigning ignorance ?

I can be quite paranoid by nature, so when someone lies to me, it sets off all sorts of suspicians about their motivations and whether they are doing it just to play mind games with me or somesuch.

He has often told me that if he didn't like me, he would simply not come round anymore or talk to me, but my logic says, if he likes me then why does he sometimes do things that surely any intelligent person would realise are wrong?

For a man who goes on and on about cheating spouses, the state of the world, how bad murders are and how people are ripped off in life, he really does disappoint me with his own behaviour at times like this.

I shall most likely say something to him about the weight tickets and my nicotine to make it clear that it upsets me when my things are hidden, moved or damaged. If it continues to happen, I shall have to be more direct and tell him that he is not welcome anymore unless he stops the behaviours.

I find it absurd that someone of his age should be so immature.

Good, you are taking direct action. That is what is needed

This is information you should not have left out as doing so has misrepresented the situation and caused you to initially get replies that are not optimal for addressing the situation.

If not directly and if not passively, exactly how would you like him to confront you when he has an issue with something you're doing?

When I said he used to be direct to a point he upset me, he would not tell me what the problem was or what was concerning him, but rather call me such things as a 'psychopath' , 'selfish b***h' and 'psychotic', leaving me having no idea what the real issue was, and obviously very hurt. Often he would come out with these things at a time when I was trying to tell him of something he had done that was upsetting, which made it even more confusing, and then later on would sometimes indicate what was behind his reaction.

He has never simply told me he has an issue with something I am doing or have said to him.
He just does not seem to do that sort of communication.

That is not being direct, that is being verbally abusive.

Isn't this the guy who said those things and then said "oh, don't mind me, ignore things I say like that" and continued saying them even when the OP said that they were hurtful and he later went into a rage?

The guy's 'testing' you to see how much crap you'll put up with. Don't play his game.