Facial Expression

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it is hard to learn facial expressions when you dont know what they are supposed to look like and its even harder to be constantly aware of them. i cant tell you if you look sad in this picture or not, your labial angles are pretty low there which could suggest "not happy" but could also be a completely relaxed and neutral state in my eyes, but i cant read facial expressions so you should really ask someone who naturally understands them.

my suggestion would be to just smile a bit when you are feeling neutral and looking at someone, something like smile exercise picture 2, just to the degree where its still pretty comfortable with mouth closed, and increase it in case you really appreciate something. try that and check with someone who can tell you if it reflects what you want to express or not. i wish there were "happy or not" instead of "hot or not" votingsites on the internet providing such input for the common frownie.

i think i am capable of smiling naturally in case something is really fascinating or funny to me and i try to smile as some quiet friendly "hi" when i meet someone, but it is hard to recreate that in a social context. my reactiontime equals (toaster)² anyway and until i made it from my current thoughts to reality and figured out that 1 i know the person in front of me, 2 the person is looking at me, 3 the person is smiling, 4 i want to smile too and 5 thought about something funny, i usually already spent a few seconds blankly staring at someone. latency increases dramatically when i have to think of something to say as well and a girl i knew used to imitate the windows welcome sound prior to my replies. meh.

facial expressions other than smiles are way too complicated for me and i dont know much about emotions in voices. if you are quite musical listening to other people a lot and adapting the most common intonations can be very helpful, or a rhetoric course maybe. but it seems that despite their initial confusion people can adapt to a 24/7 pokerface when they got used to it and once you smile now and then and assure them you are ok they are perfectly fine with that. kindness and avoiding misunderstandings is probably much more important.

I constalty get mistaken for being either tired or angry...

Half the time i probably am tired... but not angry... people dont see me when im angry... i go and hide

Just give her some time. Those NT superpowers will kick in soon.

As for acting, I don't recommend it for personal relationships. It's ok to act in front of your co-workers or your boss, or any other form of formal/work or education related situation. But with your friends, family and your partner, you want to be yourself.

Because you can only act for a while and your mask will break at one point and they will see the real you and then it could become a problem.

Plus, you want the person to like for who you are and not because you pretended you're something that you're not.

I'm all for learning social cues and coming mechanisms, but it's one thing to learn how to talk to a girl or compliment her and another one to hide who you really are for days and months by mimicking an actor from a movie.

I've found something that may help us guys with poor facial expressions.

Sexy Facial Expressions Part 1

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nx2KqC_YaM8[/youtube]

That's interesting, because you seem like a very fun, cheerful guy here on WP.

That's exactly my point: he probably is a very fun, cheerful guy - it just doesn't show up on his face in a way that NTs can understand...

Yes, I know. That's often problem for Aspies. But I guess all it takes for people to get to know us, right?

Right?

That's certainly what I hope, I just worry that people are reluctant to get to that point because they are so put-off by their misinterpretation of our facial expressions...

Some people will be put-off by it, true. But there will always be those who are ready to learn more about an Aspie and who wouldn't mind his "unusual" facial expressions.

I know it's difficult for an Aspie to socialize, but it does help if you spend more time with well meaning NTs.

I've definitely got that base covered right now.

I know and I'm happy for you. But I was talking about Dingo and the other Aspie guys (and girls!) in general.

As for you, I don't think you should worry about your facial expression at all.

I know, I just never can resist an opportunity to say it... /LimerantFool

How hard a facial expression can be?

Here, some lessons:

Amused
http://i1118.photobucket.com/albums/k61 ... b1bc85.jpg


Not amused

http://i1118.photobucket.com/albums/k61 ... c80799.jpg

Gawd damn, I suck.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 22 Nov 2011, 10:41 am, edited 1 time in total.

Is that you?

The facial expressions were good. I don't see anything wrong about them.

But I must say I'm a bit tormented by Wolfheart video.

Wolfheart's advice is silly.

The guy has sexy facial expressions because he's exceptionally handsome himself.

And his facial expressions can't be emulated, they're part of him.

Why people often refer to celebs in everything? they're exceptions too.

The funny thing you say this, because the reason I was tormented by the video wasn't that the guy was hot... But because I don't think his facial expressions suit him at all.

On the other hand, I do think mimicking other people can be helpful, to a degree. If you're not good at mimicking real people, try actors. I know movies aren't real life but for some reason it's easier for me to follow social interactions in movies than in real life.

And I do agree attractive men usually get a pass where less attractive ones don't, but I don't think that's the issue here.