Why do a lot of couples look like they're related?

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I guess it's because a lot of people of the same race/nationality often end up together.

Not me, I have a few Asian exes and for some reason am attracted to mainly non-europeans, probably because they are gentler and quieter than white guys and I'm fairly dark as well although mostly 'European.'

I don't know why... I've seen a few couples who definitely look alike.

But my boyfriend and I don't look similar at all - he's tall with dark hair, with Italian heritage, whereas I'm short and blond.

The idea we have in our heads as "most attractive" is often a loose average of the people we see. (This is why composite faces of lots of images come out to look pretty.
We see our families (and ourselves) an awful lot which probably skews the "average" in our heads.

I'm Asian, but I'm not attracted to Asian men at all. They all seem like distant relatives to me.

But I've noticed that when I see men who I think are attractive, I wish I were them.

well, i don't know about other couples, but i definitely DON'T like looking like my partner. i broke up with someone once because i felt like we were eerily similar, not unlike a brother and sister. so it felt too strange, like looking in a mirror.

my boyfriend is mixed race - white and black caribbean, and i am very pale white. he is also about 8 inches taller than me and he has a very masculine body shape while my body shape is very feminine. plus he's nicer than me! but that part isn't appearance.

back when i was married, my husband and i looked very dissimilar, even after 20 years together.

username: Cafeaulait

(i admit, i did wonder about your username).

This reminds me of the episode of Family Guy where Chris is dating a girl who looks like Lois.

i found an interesting article about this:

http://www.nytimes.com/1987/08/11/scien ... all&src=pm

here is an article that looked at similarity between couples, but the authors believed the phenomenon may be a result of assortative mating (we tend to date people of equal levels of attractiveness, which makes us look similar):

http://www.psyc.nott.ac.uk/research/vis ... ak1999.pdf

I haven't dated anyone of a similar cultural background as me. Right now I am dating an Asian guy. I guess I am attracted to the gentle nature of Asian men in general. I can't imagine what it would be like dating someone of a similar background as me. I don't know, I think there is a kind of exoticism of dating someone very different than you. But some people may drift towards familiarity instead.

Not like I have a wealth of dating experience or anything, but yes I do tend to be attracted to my own race more. With about 97% of my country being white, its only natural for me to associate white people with familiarity, plus having my optioned narrowed if I preferred another ethnicity! Although I don't think the nature of a person is defined by race, I think that's more to do with the environment you have been brought up in and are currently living in. I mean, Scottish people are stereotyped as being miserable and unhealthy, and neither apply to me.

I can see that being an issue with interracial dating. Though I have grown up in a cultural melting pot of a city. I guess interracial dating seems more natural to me since my city has such a diverse population. Sometimes I forget that other places may be less diverse.

I looked it up, and 50% of the population of my city consists of visible minorities. Never knew that before!

Remember the movie ' back to the future', where young marty jnr was being nursed and tended by his mother from the past, who was his age during that scene?

he knew she was his mum, but she didnt know he was her son

and she was really juicing all over him like a rash


oooooh icky area of conversation TMI

I've noticed this phenomena as well. I believe it's an extension of species determination for the purpose of procreating. Embedded in the genetic coding of most visually oriented creatures is a simple command, "FIND LIKE".

There is a species of bird in New Zealand called the Kakapo, which which seems to lack this command. It was driven to near extinction by Europeans and non-native species, and efforts to rebuild populations through a breeding program have struggled due to the fact that the birds seem to find the human researchers more sexually attractive than other birds of the same species.

I think personalities factor into it. People tend to find long-term partners who's personality complements their own. Personality plays a part in the way people dress. The way they interact together can also affect others perceptions on how they look.

They could be all going Jerry Lee Lewis (rock n roll star) on us and marrying their cousins