I need a girlfriend and it's killing me!

Post Reply New Topic

I'm the same i'm 21 I want a girlfriend and always feel under pressure about it, I am picky and only go for a specific personality and looks with a girl, but I hate it when I get pressured by mates and they try and put me in with girls and I'm either not interested in or they purposely but me with girls who aren't all that good looking or don't have a personality I can connect with. Plus I am very shy, nervous and have a bit of low self esteem in large social gatherings.

Then they have a go at me for not trying and they start thinking I'm gay they don't know I have Aspergers and I don't think they'll understand thats why I act like I do and they try and want me to do something like grab a womans butt in a nightclub or try and "get off" with them I always feel uncomfortable cause I don't understand why that would get a womans attention I just think a slap on the face or a yell in your ear.

They've had gfs but haven't lasted long cause of the way they act so why should they go off on one with me for not having a gf

hmmm.

okay.


here's my take on it.

Relationships are, at least the very core of human evolution. make sense? good. writing about how desperate and lonely you are because of the fact that you don't happen to have a girlfriend, or boyfriend, is by all means, a waste of your time. While I understand that most of you are (try not to kill me at this wording) "inept" at social contact and other oddities that we borderliners can deal with, there are things that can be done to help with stuff like this. I would advise you to try and not think about it, and instead focus on making yourself into a better person. By doing this, not only do you become better, but at the same time you will find it easier to be more socially outgoing.

that's my take on it folks. I thought about writing more. But my ideas are slowly dripping away like sand in the water.

Gamester be preaching 'bout strengthening yo mind, so to speak!

Gamester be right, in my belief, you be focusin' yo soul on da wrong shiat, focus it on something mo positive

OK, I stop writing like a loser, I do think Gamester is right, try to not let it get you down. Much easier said then done, but the thing is, it can be done - so focus on it ('it' being anything but this (women/men troubles))

1. Loneliness sucks. I think that's part of the definition of the word. If not, Webster's needs to get on that.
2. If you are convinced that ending the feeling of loneliness is the best solution, you must give off the appearance of "desirability." Moping is not an action that is commonly linked with desirability.
3. Focusing on how much loneliness sucks will induce the moping effect.

Sure, feel free to rant about it, if you must. Do it here though. (Here being online, or in a journal, or...you get the idea.) Getting this sort of thing out is helpful, and can get your mind cleared of it so you can use your time away from here for better things.

4. Being in a relationship, though it can take care of the whole loneliness thing, does not guarantee a condition of not suck. It merely means that whatever condition you are in, loneliness may not be a factor. Relationship can still result in a condition that is, well, very much t3h suck. If your only goal in getting into a relationship is to take care of the loneliness issue, you should consider getting a pet. They help some. Isn't the same, I know, but again, gets your mind off the loneliness, makes the possibility of a relationship higher.

[bitter rant]And when that heartless b***h stomps all over you, you'll at least have the cat to go back to. He may not understand your words, but he will at least appreciate you, even if he does treat you like s**t. The b***h just treated you like s**t. [/bitter rant]

And if you don't have a pet cat, a pet dog will give you unconditional love.

I concur with your statements, I want a girlfriend badly as well, but I'm 25 and my chances of finding one are pretty much gone. If I even had 1 second of a chance it'd happened by now, so I must reside myself to being alone :-(