What would be a good Christmas gift for a pre-teen girl?

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In situations where an adult injects extraneous sexual topics into a discussion by a 14 year old, yes.

If you have a 14 year old, would you like strangers to approach them and start talking to them about sexual matters?

The kid was asking a simple question that had nothing to do with sex. Introducing questions of having sex with 10 to 12 year old girls would have been in extraordinarily poor judgement if the comments had been made by someone he knew. That they were made by someone who I assume is a complete stranger to him is absolutely inexcusable.

when preteens are dating, it is a natural concern that sex will be involved. hence people's worries in the thread, and also why sex education is offered in schools. nobody is encouraging him to run off and have sex - they are making sure that any activities are legal and acceptable. and if they are not legal and acceptable, they are satisfying themselves that this isn't the aim of the OP.

it isn't typical for 14 year olds to date 10 to 12 year olds, so people will understandably have questions about that, and will want to discuss legality. if you are uncomfortable with the conversation, i'd suggest that you take yourself to another thread.

now once again, please allow the thread to go back on topic (gifts and preteen/youth dating). thank you.

I remember being a 14-year-old boy... yes... hormones are definitely raging by that point but I highly recommend avoiding their use until one's brain catches up with their glands!

Some suggested items would be good for a FRIEND - someone you already know at least fairly well (you know each other's names and talk beyond classes. (I forget, she's younger so not in your class.) If she's not already a friend, any gift would be seen as creepy and weird... it would be inappropriate and I'd avoid doing it.

At this point in your life, that 1-3 years of age difference is HUGE, not just in life experience but even the development of the body itself. Don't kid yourself, it's the kind of thing that could mess her head up for life! DO NOT go beyond friendship unless she's within ~1 year of age... at least until you're in high school or so.

I wasn't trying to comment on the moral virtuousness of his relationship one way or the other. I was simply stating that even if it's alleged that they had anything sexual happen, he could be deeply screwed. The allegation doesn't even have to be from your girlfriend or her family, it could simply be rumors started by people, say in school. Those rumors get to anyone in authority, there's a high chance of some legal matter occurring, maybe not jail at your age (though there are plenty of 14 year olds in jail for sex offenses.) And if you got a "case" to happen, it'd be tough, as you'd be at an age where sexuality is more common (your age is age of consent in much of the world,) and she'd be at an age where it's not supposed to be common at all.

As far as insinuating sexuality, when I was in middle school, people were having sex. I don't think it's a good thing, but it was happening. And as I said before, it doesn't matter what is actually happening, you simply have to be accused, and once you are accused, you lose.

I did see the example of a 15 year old girl and a 13 year old guy listed here. What you must understand is the law is applied differently, and public opinion differs. You see this in the instances of the teachers that get in trouble for having sex with students. Legally it does work out pretty similar for most, but guys that get in trouble for it people think of as monsters, and girls that get in trouble for it, people go "AWW, WHEN I WAS HIS AGE, I WANTED TO SCREW THOSE HOT TEACHERS, YEAH!" It's because the male is the stronger sex biologically, and an older women wouldn't be seen as taking advantage of a younger guy, as the guy is considered strong enough to make his own decisions, but girls are seen as weak, because they biologically are weaker than men.

Sorry for the can of worms I opened.

It was indeed 14 way back when but they changed it to 16.

But there is the "close in age" exception.

Just so you all know, I gave her the gifts today. I got her a pillow with a bunch of hearts on it and a t-shirt with a racoon in a lot of different outfits. She liked it and said thank you, Merry Christmas, and even gave me a hug :3. Some of you can go away, really far away, with some of the crap you said. Have a Merry Christmas.