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Misslizard
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05 Jun 2013, 8:18 am

What's good or bad depends on someone's perspective,so it does not matter.


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marshall
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05 Jun 2013, 9:52 am

MXH wrote:
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But really, by your response it does sound like talking from the heart. So I'm sure you know the feeling


More like I just find insecure hypocrisy annoying. If the anti-whining crowd was exclusively comprised of people who are 100% happy and satisfied with themselves and have never ever complained about anything in their life ever, I wouldn't find it quite so annoying. It's just that I've seen it happen over and over again on this site where a person frequently chimes in on threads bashing "complainers", and then I later I witness a massive steaming dump of self-pity over in the Haven or L&D from the same person. :shrug: I could list some names but I won't.



appletheclown
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05 Jun 2013, 10:13 am

marshall wrote:
MXH wrote:
Image
But really, by your response it does sound like talking from the heart. So I'm sure you know the feeling


More like I just find insecure hypocrisy annoying. If the anti-whining crowd was exclusively comprised of people who are 100% happy and satisfied with themselves and have never ever complained about anything in their life ever, I wouldn't find it quite so annoying. It's just that I've seen it happen over and over again on this site where a person frequently chimes in on threads bashing "complainers", and then I later I witness a massive steaming dump of self-pity over in the Haven or L&D from the same person. :shrug: I could list some names but I won't.


Why can't we just call it being bored instead of whining?

The most effective anti-whining is encouragement, not discouragement. You also have to acknowledge the people who give up cold turkey yet still complain, God only knows why. But people who at least try are usually looking for actual help, so there is no point in telling them to stop whining, as they are at least wanting to make an effort.


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MXH
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05 Jun 2013, 10:33 am

marshall wrote:
MXH wrote:
Image
But really, by your response it does sound like talking from the heart. So I'm sure you know the feeling


More like I just find insecure hypocrisy annoying. If the anti-whining crowd was exclusively comprised of people who are 100% happy and satisfied with themselves and have never ever complained about anything in their life ever, I wouldn't find it quite so annoying. It's just that I've seen it happen over and over again on this site where a person frequently chimes in on threads bashing "complainers", and then I later I witness a massive steaming dump of self-pity over in the Haven or L&D from the same person. :shrug: I could list some names but I won't.


See this is the thing, you don't have to have your life perfect to appreciate not having to go through the effort of trying to help smene out only to hear more excuses and bitching. Ive not said ban all whinng, but that those who do it every single post of theirs (I can name 5 off the top of my head) yet when one tries to help them they attack you because they are so engulfed in their self pity induced victimized mind.



marshall
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05 Jun 2013, 11:31 am

MXH wrote:
marshall wrote:
MXH wrote:
Image
But really, by your response it does sound like talking from the heart. So I'm sure you know the feeling


More like I just find insecure hypocrisy annoying. If the anti-whining crowd was exclusively comprised of people who are 100% happy and satisfied with themselves and have never ever complained about anything in their life ever, I wouldn't find it quite so annoying. It's just that I've seen it happen over and over again on this site where a person frequently chimes in on threads bashing "complainers", and then I later I witness a massive steaming dump of self-pity over in the Haven or L&D from the same person. :shrug: I could list some names but I won't.


See this is the thing, you don't have to have your life perfect to appreciate not having to go through the effort of trying to help smene out only to hear more excuses and bitching. Ive not said ban all whinng, but that those who do it every single post of theirs (I can name 5 off the top of my head) yet when one tries to help them they attack you because they are so engulfed in their self pity induced victimized mind.


Well, I just try to be nice until there's nothing left for me to say and then I just ignore them. I'll get on people when their ranting includes extreme black-and-white thinking that makes no sense, blatant misogyny, and/or gratuitous NT bashing. Just plain self-pity isn't worth bashing over. It's the internet and I can choose to back off if it gets to be too much for me.



MXH
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05 Jun 2013, 12:37 pm

All I know is it gets in the way of people who will actually use that help, thus why I want them gone.



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05 Jun 2013, 1:04 pm

I honestly have no idea what my qualities are xD.


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Ann2011
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05 Jun 2013, 2:41 pm

PsychoSarah wrote:
On this thread, I would like people to list their good qualities and their bad qualities.


I'm loyal, short-tempered, anxious, open to other points of view, like learning, have self-destructive tendencies, am reliable.



spongy
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05 Jun 2013, 2:57 pm

The person Im "closest" to right now described me as a star last night, with plenty of issues but a star nonetheless.
Good:
1- I can listen to most people
2- I can make almost everyone smile
3- I have developed an educated opinion on most topics that are "in"(helps with the small talk, you memorize random lines and you sound smart).
4 - I m not that bad looking.
5- I have my own way of transport and my parents dont ask many questions so my schedule is pretty flexible right now
6- If Im in my comfort zone I feel comfortable with the people surrounding me and so on and I make a point to meet people at my comfort zone once a week
7- Most people enjoy talking to me if Im on my comfort zone
Bad:
- Once I m outside my comfort zone 2, 3, 6 dissapear and you are left with someone that is balding at 22, who has a tendency to mix clothing styles more than he should(I like it but most people dont) and who doesnt speak that much.
- There arent that many age appropiate girls in my comfort zone right now so I m working on expanding it.



PsychoSarah
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05 Jun 2013, 6:29 pm

I do complain. A lot. But not about my lack of getting dates. I am well aware that is my fault. People ask me out and I say no. The fact that I mention that I haven't been in a relationship isn't a complaint, but rather a weak attempt to make some of the people on here feel better.



OliveOilMom
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05 Jun 2013, 6:39 pm

spongy wrote:
The person Im "closest" to right now described me as a star last night, with plenty of issues but a star nonetheless.
Good:
1- I can listen to most people
2- I can make almost everyone smile
3- I have developed an educated opinion on most topics that are "in"(helps with the small talk, you memorize random lines and you sound smart).
4 - I m not that bad looking.
5- I have my own way of transport and my parents dont ask many questions so my schedule is pretty flexible right now
6- If Im in my comfort zone I feel comfortable with the people surrounding me and so on and I make a point to meet people at my comfort zone once a week
7- Most people enjoy talking to me if Im on my comfort zone
Bad:
- Once I m outside my comfort zone 2, 3, 6 dissapear and you are left with someone that is balding at 22, who has a tendency to mix clothing styles more than he should(I like it but most people dont) and who doesnt speak that much.
- There arent that many age appropiate girls in my comfort zone right now so I m working on expanding it.


You are actually one of the most caring people I know. For real. You should add that to your list, because it's true.


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cberg
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05 Jun 2013, 7:15 pm

Yes, what you mentioned is entirely on us as individuals, but does that really mean we shouldn't be discussing the implications?


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PsychoSarah
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05 Jun 2013, 7:19 pm

cberg wrote:
Yes, what you mentioned is entirely on us as individuals, but does that really mean we shouldn't be discussing the implications?


List your stuff.



supguysfriedchicken
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06 Jun 2013, 3:08 am

Bad Qualities: I won't waste anyone's time with that. Let's just say there are a lot.

Good Qualities: 404 Not Found.


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meems
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Ann2011
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08 Jun 2013, 7:12 pm

meems wrote:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=sonder

Sonder (3rd definition)
The realization that everyone around you has a life outside of yours, complete with their own thoughts, feelings, and emotions. You could potentially be just a passing figure on the street to them.

This has always scared me . . . not sure why. But I didn't know there was a word for it!