The REAL reason why you don't have a girlfriend/wife

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You can always ask for help from a friend, which is a wingman. To help you with this. Always ask for help.

Ummm... no. It is very relevant. Why is it? Because there's tons of males here who have the will to go out and look for a mate, who are als realistic in choice, Tec but they have absolutely no clue on how to read someone or to communicate desire. You're choosing to blanket statement all males for the same 8 guys that make all the threads here

I agree wholeheartedly, i sometimes think that we get alot of people bandwagon themselves with us.. along with the (asexual + other socially awkward) communities, not saying people aren't aspies (still hate that term) but its a pretty lame excuse "why don't nts like us", i think people on the whole prefer to blame a 3rd party than to actually put the effort in.

hold on there. There are alot of aspie men that actual do go out there, and do try to get dates but fail.
not all dateless men are the shy or nervous around women type. Not all are computer nerds, who sit on the computer all day complaining
on WP. and not all dateless men are only chase after supermodels.

People here are stuck on the shy and lazy type, but yet seem ignore guys like me and others, who do go out and put up in effort
to met the ladies, so please, don't think we don't ever try.

Keep trying bill, thats all you can do bro, eventually law of probability means you'll do well.
The post is more aimed at "oh im an aspie so im forever alone, so i wont bother" kinda people

I hate when people think, guys don't get date because they don't try.
that might be true for some, but not all of us are shy.
s**t, I can go up to any women and talk to them, so I am not shy.
or Am I lazy.

And why can't said guys read up on the subject and learn about it?

That's what they are bloody here for, not to hear someone insulting them like your first post did. Hell, in case you didn't notice most threads here are asking for advice or giving advice. Very little are truly complaining.

I'm talking about books and credible sources; not some stupid ass message board where most people bond by their misery.

I'm not here to insult, and if I am then I'm not as harsh as most people on here are on themselves.

[1] Not in my experience. I had moments in my life, when younger, with quite poor social skills. And this is not like you say.

O course, a very different thing is shifting between rejections and successes (as most of people). A rejection doesn't matter too much, but when you're doing wrong and you don't exactly what, every fail is the a confirmation of it. And the sense of impotence, the uncertainty about whether you can fix it, is something that hurts too much.

This popular 'positivism' seems to me like a philosophy about how to endure hunger thought up by somebody whose biggest experience with hunger is going to bed without dinner.

[2] I'm an aspie that has lived in a NT world without knowing about Aspergers for years. Everytime somebody said something about me -figuring out me in a NT way, of course-, he/she was wrong. So right now I really don't care about what people say, neither positive nor negative. I listen as politely as possible, but don't really pay much attention on. I can't answer your question in an constructive way with regard to debate.

[3] On the contrary, this is your business. If you're -for example- trying to get laid by a woman (or going out with her), how you come out of this comparison is something that falls on you.

Of course, one thing is to compare yourself when pursuing a specific goal, so you know which are your chances to score and where are your weaknesses, and another very different thing is to compare yourself just because.

Very interesting way of putting it. I feel I'm OK at accomplishing a scientific goal, as I can at least put everything in perspective.

Of course turning people into "scientific goals" makes you into a bit of a sociopath.

Says the person who has actually been in a relationship before. So much for your assumptions.

Januaryman, you are correct, I'm not a lesbian.




Thank you, Seven of Nine.

I don't think so. Sociopathy is about lack of empathy, not about analyzing coldly a situation.

Of couse, lacking of empathy involves cold analyzing, but cold analyzing doesn't involve necessarily lack of empathy.

In my opinion asperger and sociopathy have features that produce a similar look (so they're often mixed up), but that are very different in nature. Usually people with asperger are:

(1) Deadly honest => quite unpassionate and straightforward analyses.
(2) Lacking of social skills => unempathic appearance (I remark: appearance).

If you combine unpassionate analyses and unempathic appearance the outcome can look as sociopathic lack of empathy, but it is not.

Seven of Nine??

From Star Trek.

Just Google "Seven of Nine" and "is irrelevant" together and you'll see what I'm talking about.

I know her, from Voyager, that's why I've blushed she was.... my teen fantasy