How do you know if a guy likes you or wants to be friends?

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Alycat
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16 Nov 2013, 5:12 pm

octobertiger wrote:

Oh goody

Why didn't you say before?

Maybe he needs a bit more time - some men do.

Do you want this person as a facebook buddy?

If you don't, I'd talk for a little longer, then put the ball in his court, and ask him to text you if he can think of something he could suggest doing with you in 'real life' - and to text you a response. Then, leave it altogether...unless you think he's worth breaking a lot of rules for.

If that's all that is offered then yes. But I like him, so ideally no.
I'll leave it a bit and psych myself up to suggest hanging out.

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octobertiger
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16 Nov 2013, 5:14 pm

I hope it goes well for you. I've read some of your past posts and I think you deserve a lot of happiness. :thumleft:

Sometimes to make an omlette, one has got to break a few ovoid projectiles. :lol:

Last edited by octobertiger on 16 Nov 2013, 5:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

smudge
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16 Nov 2013, 5:16 pm

I completely get what you are talking about. However, I do not possess the knowledge to overcome these habits. If someone could teach me...bad memories are hard to forget.

I think my main problem is I'm just not subtle, and I don't know how to be. I appear forward and this frustrates me to no end. But anyway, I guess this is about Alycat, not me.

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Last edited by smudge on 16 Nov 2013, 5:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

octobertiger
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16 Nov 2013, 5:18 pm

Oh yeah...

Alycat wrote:

[ It could be more than that. Usually my bedtime is ten-ish but I've been staying online until about two to talk. I think it has been every day.

If you're doing this, then you ARE invested, to some degree. Stop it! Wean yourself off it. Let him miss your correspondence, then maybe if you lean back a bit...he'll advance, to fill the space. Maybe. Or maybe he just won't take the step. That's his loss.

octobertiger
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16 Nov 2013, 5:21 pm

smudge wrote:

You are in very good company, I assure you.

Bad memories do not mean anything at all...it is old feelings attached to them that are the problems.

And I assure you, some men appreciate women who are forward and brave.

It is about Alycat, but you are important too.

smudge
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16 Nov 2013, 5:32 pm

octobertiger wrote:

smudge wrote:

Thank you.

See, when you say such nice things it appears sincere. I wouldn't have the guts to say that to someone without appearing like a creep.

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Alycat
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16 Nov 2013, 5:38 pm

Smudge - I tend to be too forward too, and end up with guys who want an easy lay.
I don't want that though. I want to find a guy, settle down, get married, have kids etc.

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octobertiger
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16 Nov 2013, 5:44 pm

'appears'? Yet, you still question.

If I say how I feel, then it's none of my business what someone else thinks of me. The two don't go together. Saying how I feel doesn't gurantee that what I say will be taken in the most positive light - that means I am setting a condition, when it should be unconditional.

The fear of appearing like a creep - that is in you, first and foremost.

billiscool
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16 Nov 2013, 5:46 pm

aly,why don't you just go up to your male friend and kiss him.
that what my female friend did to me.she kissed me,right
on the lips.

smudge
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16 Nov 2013, 5:57 pm

octobertiger wrote:

Of course. I have to, I hope you don't take offence to that.

I realise it is in me, but since I appear too forward, to men *and* women, it's not a good idea for me to compliment too much.

Alycat, what happens to me is that a guy shows interest in me and gets confused and intrigued because I don't pick up on his interest, or I assume he just wants to be friends with me. Then he finds out I'm not interested and buggers off. Or, I show interest in a man and he buggers off.

Also, the rule of a guy staying over has always bloody confused me. The rule of a guy hanging out with a girl at all has always fried my brain. I can't deal with hidden meanings and causing men to go distant when I've no idea what I've done wrong.

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Alycat
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16 Nov 2013, 6:10 pm

billiscool wrote:

aly,why don't you just go up to your male friend and kiss him.
that what my female friend did to me.she kissed me,right
on the lips.

Don't tempt me - I think being smacked in the face might hurt

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billiscool
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16 Nov 2013, 6:22 pm

Alycat wrote:

billiscool wrote:

aly,why don't you just go up to your male friend and kiss him.
that what my female friend did to me.she kissed me,right
on the lips.

Don't tempt me - I think being smacked in the face might hurt

if that's too risky,next time you see your friend,ask him for a hug.
and give him a very tight hug,and put your head on
his chest. that what my female friend did to me.

Tequila
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16 Nov 2013, 6:24 pm

leafplant wrote:

OP is from the UK. Here, not taking into account other people's cultural differences makes you look like a dork.

Taking a person of the opposite sex that you aren't dating to the beach in the UK would seem odd no matter what time of year.

Tequila
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16 Nov 2013, 6:29 pm

smudge wrote:

But then, I'm probably just a bitter old 26 year old.

Can I be bitter too? Please please please?

I have plenty of Bitrex to go around!

Giftorcurse
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16 Nov 2013, 6:41 pm

When they stick a gun in your gut, and say:
"Get in my car, b***h. f**k time's here."

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Alycat
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17 Nov 2013, 3:24 am

Giftorcurse wrote:

When they stick a gun in your gut, and say:
"Get in my car, b***h. f**k time's here."

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If you don't believe in dragons it is curiously true, that the dragons you disparage choose to not believe in you.

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