Being Creepy

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SoftwareEngineer
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06 May 2014, 1:50 am

Dan_Undiagnosed wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

On the subject of being called names, I'll bet just about every guy has had a girlfriend call him every name in the book. Things like creep, low life, filth, scum, dirt bag, and bastard always bring a warm glow to my heart, when yelled by a charming young lady. And, a few kicks in the shin are frosting on the cake.

I would quit her before she says the second name.

Yeah I don't think your girlfriend is supposed to call you names like that.

The particular babe who inspired that was my girlfriend many years ago. Back then, my theory was "Every good woman is part animal, and the great ones are all animal." At the time, no one knew I was autistic. But, she knew that I didn't respond enough to her tantrums, so she turned up the heat. I never got seriously hurt, but I did get a few bruises. She was a wild woman. If you've never had a girlfriend attack you, try this - when she is almost asleep, stick your tongue in her navel and wiggle it around like a worm. You too will be the recipient of insults and bruises. And, you'll feel like a real man.

The_Face_of_Boo
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06 May 2014, 2:15 am

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

Dan_Undiagnosed wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

I would quit her before she says the second name.

Yeah I don't think your girlfriend is supposed to call you names like that.

This is not the BDSM section.

SoftwareEngineer
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06 May 2014, 2:24 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

Dan_Undiagnosed wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

I would quit her before she says the second name.

Yeah I don't think your girlfriend is supposed to call you names like that.

This is not the BDSM section.

I know. And, I don't do things like that for kinky reasons. Stunts like that are included in the manly art of being cute. It's like putting a rubber snake in her purse or a giant plastic spider in the bathtub. They act like they hate it, but they love the attention.

Last edited by SoftwareEngineer on 06 May 2014, 2:38 am, edited 1 time in total.

The_Face_of_Boo
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06 May 2014, 2:25 am

Al725 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I had a voice conversation yesterday with a total creepy woman:
She told me how she met a Saudi businessman who proposed fetish sex to her, she saved the conversation and the pictures he sent and used them to blackmail him, she made him to pay all the college payments in advance. She also faked the role of prostitute with several men, she goes with him in the car followed by her bf, and just after the guy pays and before anything happens the bf strikes the room/car (playing the role of angry husband) and threatens the guy who would eventually run away in panic, then the couple share the cash.

Doesn't sound creepy to me. She sounds like a c**t. She'll get hers one day. Might end up stuffed in a garbage can. That would be a fitting end to her "vareer".

It was creepy because she was telling me all that and you would wonder if she would intend to blackmail you too if she gets her hands on something for you, hence why I blocked her.

Dan_Undiagnosed
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06 May 2014, 3:12 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Al725 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Doesn't sound creepy to me. She sounds like a c**t. She'll get hers one day. Might end up stuffed in a garbage can. That would be a fitting end to her "vareer".

It was creepy because she was telling me all that and you would wonder if she would intend to blackmail you too if she gets her hands on something for you, hence why I blocked her.

Oh this was online? Hell yeah block her haha. If it was in real life just back away slowly.

bleh12345
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06 May 2014, 3:58 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Al725 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Doesn't sound creepy to me. She sounds like a c**t. She'll get hers one day. Might end up stuffed in a garbage can. That would be a fitting end to her "vareer".

It was creepy because she was telling me all that and you would wonder if she would intend to blackmail you too if she gets her hands on something for you, hence why I blocked her.

Who the hell would tell you that? If you run a scam like that, why on earth would you tell people? o.O

The_Face_of_Boo
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06 May 2014, 4:20 am

bleh12345 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Al725 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Doesn't sound creepy to me. She sounds like a c**t. She'll get hers one day. Might end up stuffed in a garbage can. That would be a fitting end to her "vareer".

It was creepy because she was telling me all that and you would wonder if she would intend to blackmail you too if she gets her hands on something for you, hence why I blocked her.

Who the hell would tell you that? If you run a scam like that, why on earth would you tell people? o.O

The hell I know, her voice tone sounded genuine, I didn't want to venture in her creepy stories any longer so I told her goodnight and blocked afterward.

hale_bopp
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06 May 2014, 4:39 am

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

He isn't the problem here, it's me, no matter what angle it's looked at.

And I know I messed up.

Generally speaking, do you consider yourself the cause, or are you a catalyst? If you are truly the cause, then we might be able to say you are the problem. But, if something you did simply exposed his negative characteristic, then you were a catalyst, not a problem, so you are not at fault.

Think about this scenario - a group of workers with a latent prejudice all get along well and there are no problems. Then, a person who fits the demographic of the prejudice joins the group and subsequently there are lots of problems. Who is the cause? Who is the catalyst? Who is wrong? I'm offering that metaphor thinking you might be able to apply it to your situation. Remember, just because you are different is no reason for you to be saddled with guilt. Being different does not make you culpable for all of the effects of your differences. That has been very well established in the areas of race, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc. So, please consider extending to yourself the same courtesy you would extend to minorities. You give acceptance, you can also expect to receive the same.

I can safely say I was the cause.

As to what I said, it was something about "after a while of watching you" I know that sounds really creepy but it wasn't meant in a creepy or stalkerish way. I just tend to observe people a lot.

Trust me the way I worded it was way creepier than that I just don't remember how it was worded. I thought it would sound funny if anything but *cringe*

bleh12345
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06 May 2014, 4:54 am

hale_bopp wrote:

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

He isn't the problem here, it's me, no matter what angle it's looked at.

And I know I messed up.

I imagined myself saying that. I lol'ed. Honestly, my friends would think it was funny, but coworkers would be like

I probably would sound like Hannibal Lecter.

SabbraCadabra
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06 May 2014, 5:09 am

hale_bopp wrote:

Trust me the way I worded it was way creepier than that I just don't remember how it was worded. I thought it would sound funny if anything but *cringe*

"I've been gazing upon you intently for several hours, unblinking, memorizing every feature, and I've ... *heavy breathing* ... made an observation about your habits that I'd like to share."

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The_Face_of_Boo
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06 May 2014, 5:34 am

I see it as an overeaction, don't see it that creepy or scary, it was obviously a joke no matter the tone.

What's most likely is, hale_bopp, that your coworkers already see you as creepy, fueled by earlier rumors or your difference, and that joke just triggered this general view they already have toward you.

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06 May 2014, 10:45 am

hale_bopp wrote:

As to what I said, it was something about "after a while of watching you" I know that sounds really creepy but it wasn't meant in a creepy or stalkerish way. I just tend to observe people a lot.

Trust me the way I worded it was way creepier than that I just don't remember how it was worded. I thought it would sound funny if anything but *cringe*

Many autistics have either an avoidant gaze or direct-eye gaze. Are you comfortable with someone looking directly into your eyes? And, do you tend to look directly into people's eyes? I'm wondering if that is a factor in his reaction.

I have the direct-eye gaze. And, I've had some trouble with people who feel I'm creepy trying to justify their feeling. Those people attempt to project their feeling onto others. So, even if you did something a bit open to interpretation, you are not responsible for his interpretation.

Also, if you are the sort of autistic who is very right-sided, you will normally observe and analyze things. I'm that way, which helped a lot in software engineering. I observe people for several reasons, including the natural right-sided tendency to observe, group dynamics have a great affect on any situation, and I've learned through hard experience that I must know what is going on around me.

Patrick64
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06 May 2014, 5:27 pm

When I said hi to a girl, she looked at me weird like i'm creepy. I'm not that desperate.

Wafflemarine
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07 May 2014, 8:31 am

Well we have all said those thing the hardest part you are dealing with now Haley is beating yourself up over it and obsessing over it for no reason.

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CynicalWaffle
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19 May 2014, 11:20 am

Don't worry about it. THAT guy is the creep. Like people even have an idea what creepy is these days. In a world where serial killers can get dates, I wouldn't trust the word of anybody who calls me a creep.

Though it does seem to stick more if used on a man.

hale_bopp
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19 May 2014, 7:00 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

What's most likely is, hale_bopp, that your coworkers already see you as creepy

I doubt that.

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