Can women and men can be friends interviews..?

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Would it not be a little strange for a woman to say to a man "hey, I noticed you've been hanging around me a lot, so you must be into me, well sorry, I don't want to have sex with you or date you. I guess we can't be friends. See ya."? I'm certainly not going to be so presumptuous...what if it was just a friendship, bam, I've just ruined it unnecessarily.


Sorry to hear that that is your experience. Mine is quite different, and yes I certainly can go back to being friends after sex. Sometimes I even forget that we had sex cos it was so long ago and we are solid friends, the sex was a fun activity that we decided to do one time (or more!), but it doesn't mean it changes the friendship. Maybe strengthens it, as we become even closer due to extra intimacy.

Sex isn't as serious for everyone as it is for some.

Why stop having sex? I'll give an example. I have a male friend. He's really good looking, and fun to hang out with, but we would never work as a couple, as we are too different in our interests/where we want to go in life/etc. But there was sexual chemistry, so we had sex a few times. That was fun. Didn't change anything (other than increasing our happiness). Why did we stop? Well, it wasn't a planned thing anyway, it just occasionally happened. Technically I suppose we stopped because we both got partners, but perhaps we never would have done it again anyway. Who knows.

There are some guys that honestly don't want anything more out of the deal, but the majority do, even though they may not admit this to you, or themselves, for that matter. Trust me, I'm a guy, and I know how other guys think. I see this all the time.

It's what the guy with glasses said in the video:

https://youtu.be/T_lh5fR4DMA?t=32

The female friends of the "girl of interest" introduced to the guy may become his friends too without any initial interest from either sides, but those usually don't develop deeply .

If a man and woman who weren't childhood friends, and spend a lot of time together like "best friends" - then yeah, most probably the guy is interested and shy while the woman being naive or pretending she doesn't know it.

I mean look at all these girls in the video, they were all in denial at first "yeah! we are just friends!" then when cornered they realized they were in denial, every one of them, deep down they were aware that their close friend guys want them.

And you know what? I believe they like the idea, those girls don't want to sound unattractive and undesirable after all.

^^ This.

This times 1000

I used to think like that, but I eventually realized that if you wait for someone else to be interested in you, you are limiting yourself. Sometimes the person may be interested in you, but not act on it, and it takes one person to make the first move. The benefit of you making the first move is that you pick what you like/want and the other person may be even flattered by it.

Nothing in this conversation has answered the question of why so many people think it is impossible to be friends with anybody of a certain gender just because you can POTENTIALLY be romantically or sexually attracted to someone of that gender. Why does being attracted to women, for instance, mean that you will inevitably feel that way about every one who you could develop a friendship with? Like I said, I have a feeling that only straight people have this problem, and it has nothing to do with the reality of how attraction works and everything to do with what straight men and women are taught to expect from one another.

I don't know why you can't be friends even if you feel that way about them.

They didn't change their stance that they are just friends though. The fact that one of them wouldn't mind getting physical with the other if offered doesn't change the current status of "just friends".

I think the question is seen differently by different people. I hear "can men and women be just friends" and my answer is "yes, it happens all the time". Others seem to hear "can heterosexual, single men and women be friends without one of them being fine with physical intimacy at some point if it was on the table" and my answer is "sometimes, but in a lot of cases probably not".

That's true, I could have said "to the point of making friendship awkward and unsatisfying", but the point still stands, even moreso with the addition of those criteria. Like I said in an earlier reply, that's been a rare situation in my experience, and yet these people are mistrustful of friendships with an entire gender because of it.

If one of them has some attraction to the other and willing to jump into relationship with her if given the chance then it's not a mutual "just friends" scenario; I am emphasizing on the word just.

If they are really going that far with the "just friend" definition then who cares? It's no big deal at all if single hetero men and women are rarely just friends...they have friendships that they enjoy, so that's great. What does it matter if they would agree to sex? What has that to do with the friendship they have while they are not having sex?

It's really not even worth discussing when framed like that...

I don't know why such a friendship should be any more awkward or unsatisfying than a friendship with someone you're not romantically or sexually attracted to, including someone of the same sex if you're heterosexual. In all these cases, if you want another kind of relationship, you have to find it elsewhere.

I've never understood, either, what's so important about being just friends, emphasizing just. However, it seems to matter a lot to most women.