Do Men with Asperger's Initiate Dates?

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As an aspie male, no, I do not initiate dates. I also don't go on any dates. I'm never in a position to meet or be around women. It seems I'd have to find that seemingly mythical place referred to only as "out there" in order to meet anyone.

I initiate almost all my dates that I go on. But it takes up a lot of energy to do so. I haven't been able to go on more than one date per girl usually.

I don't. I can't read the cues and at this point I lack the confidence, like I don't see any reason why any normal person would be attracted to a person like me and where my life is at. I can change some things, I trying so hard to get somewhat functional but in the end I doubt material means would change that much rather it's more just a convenient excuse.

Well thank's bud you're pretty rad your self I'm 28 btw. I know my advice probably seemed a little childish with the letter recommendation lol but sometimes depending on the individual you gotta use unconventional methods playing the dating game.

I just read your original post about this man and a few comments down and I'm short on time otherwise I'd read more. I wouldn't be so quick to give up as that first poster recommended. I think he's probably at a loss as to what to do next and riddled with fear of messing it up on top of it. By everything you said about how he's acting would lead me to believe he is very interested in you, especially the bit you said about your conversation after the one time you guys did meet up. Don't assume that the current circumstances will persist through out the entire future, and you will only see this guy once every few months...That is ridiculous.

I think this guy is just having a hard time expressing his feelings towards you and also struggling with picking up on yours. In my opinion he just needs a push and some reassurment that his efforts will not be counteractive end up just pushing you away. He's made it clear that he's got some fear around being shot down, already. I would imagine that he attributes some of his past efforts to "make moves" with getting turned down and is probably at the very least reluctant or maybe even deathly afraid to make any moves again....reassure him that he is safe to act and speak freely around you, reassure him that you really do find him interesting and appealing...I feel like he just needs you to say it, because I do not know why else he would drag his feet for so long.

I think all of his behavior speaks for its self and I think you know that but are just afraid to put it to the test...understandably too. You've invested a lot of emotion into what you guy have shared already, I'd be afraid to put that on the line too... but if you're scared chances are he's more scared...just telling ya how it looks to me. Personally if I were in his shoes then I the only reason I wouldn't have done more to move on with everything are either 1. fear of being shot down, 2. I don't share those feelings. If it were the latter, I wouldn't have shared my insecurities around relationships or bombard you with a million thank you's and I also wouldn't be struggling so much to spend some time with you....I know that sounds backwards but I often have the hardest time letting someone get to know me, that I have strong feelings for. If it were someone I knew I had intended on keeping in the friend zone..then meeting up for short bursts wouldn't feel like such a burden because I know less is expected of me.

So If I were you I would reassure him of everything I mentioned, be blunt about your feelings with him, and if need be just flat out ask him if he feels the same way. Tell him you need to see him more than once in a blue moon. Just tell him you need to know because it's only fair to you know if these feelings are worth the energy. He wont be offended, and I think that might finally get things in motion for you two, if the feelings are mutual. Does he know you're aware of him being an aspie? That's my biggest fear around dating is that once she finds out it'll be a lost cause....

I really hope that my experiences are reflecting his behavior correctly and I'm not just giving blind advice here....either way being bold with him couldn't possibly hurt matters unless you are content on having relationship over the phone for ever...

let your friends set you up with girls, make an effort to engage in an activity you enjoy that provides a venue for meeting girls who share your interests, etc.

I'm guessing you not want to date at this time. Because if you did, you'd do *something* to put yourself in the mythical "out there" - join an online dating site, let your friends set you up with girls, make an effort to engage in an activity you enjoy that provides a venue for meeting girls who share your interests, etc.

That's always strongly felt like cheating to me. Aren't you women repulsed if we join an activity for the specific purpose of meeting you? At least, it'd be the case if I did it, because I'd have no other excuse to engage in the activity, assuming I could afford it.

If they do it is very rare, most of my relationships the woman has asked me out and when I try I freeze and chicken out, I am very very shy when it comes to approaching women.I want to ask this Amazon out but I am too damn shy and afraid regardless of her flirting, playing with her hair, approaching me and asking me what is my name. My face turns very very red when I see her and when she looks my way and smiles I stay silent and look toward the ground. My heart beats fast and I get very very nervous and dont know what to do or say without making a fool out of myself. Gah I hate it when I get like this!! ! NTs have it much easier id say, why me?! I have never had a tall chick as tall as me hit on me before its usually really short ones, sure I dont mind but this one is much younger than me and I am not used to that and it freaks me out at times!