What Does Being "In Love" Feel Like For An Aspie?

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I never been in love. I had one boyfriend when I was 21, I’m 48 now. I remember my ex-boyfriend told me he loves me, I said it back to him not knowing what love is. We were together for four months, we mutual broke up after a public fight. It’s hard telling my family I love them, I can say the word love in a greeting card, I used to say I love you to my nephew, but only to him for some reason. I don’t think I told my mom I love her, I finally told her I love her after she got cancer I cannot express other things like excitement very well.

I don't know, but I'd like to feel what it's like someday.

--Aspies who want friends or a spouse only when it's convenient for them. They want to do what they want (hobbies, etc.) and then miraculously have a person "there" when they want--

One way to show you love someone, apparently, is to be willing to give up an afternoon with your hobbies and spend time with them without hesitation.

The idea that Aspie's 'can't read people' really translates more, in relationships, to: we have what looks like a lack of empathy. I feel love deeply, but I often find myself neglecting those I love simply because I don't understand what they might need in order to FEEL loved by me. What does that look like? Does someone have a manual that lists out factors like "You should make contact at least once every two weeks, or face-to-face contact x often?"

For many NTs it seems that things like this define what it is to love someone. How often you initiate contact: "If you loved me, you'd ask me how I am feeling." But here I am -NOT- thinking, "Oh nuts, I haven't asked her how she's feeling in days..." but it isn't for lack of deep love. Just how to show it.